The Comment Awards Are Sometimes a Grumpy Loaf

A small, brown and white dog peeking over their laptop screen, with a caption that says "Hey did you see that comment?!"

It’s Friday! And what better way to spend this glorious day than talking about our pets’ amazing nicknames?! For the record, lately my pup Cyrus has been Sugarsnap, Sweet Potato, Muffin and Wiggles (when his tail is going)!

My dog Cyrus, who is small and brown and very cute

This week on Greasebats, Scout and Andy talked growth, or… lack thereof.

IMPORTANT: Which Gay Cartoon Character Are You?

Aegor reviewed We Too: Essays on Sex Work and Survival, a vitally important new anthology.

So I guess Ilene Chaiken is an executive producer of the newest Law & Order spinoff? This is the funniest thing to happen all week.

Michelle! Tea! For! Autostraddle!!!!!

Did you need a Vapid Fluff timeline of Demi Lovato’s pansexuality today? Thought so!

This is SO exciting: Welcome Our New Culture Editor, Shelli Nicole!

Brb, gonna cosplay a gay divorcée.

And then there were your comments!


On Autostraddle March Madness: Canon vs. Fanon – Sweet 16:

The Super Swan Corp Queen Award to Kristana:

Kristana posted the meme where Pam from the Office says "theyre the same picture," and it's the OUAT couple and Lena/Supergirl

On Grease Bats: Growth:

The Devil’s Due Award to :)

Love Andy’s shirt! 😈

On 38 Literary Books With Great Lesbian Sex Inside Them:

The An Education, I Guess, Award to Sally, Riese, and Snaelle:

Hang on, wasn’t that passage from My Education (a book I hold a personal grievance with) nominated for a bad sex award?!

It’s the book equivalent of a fast food truck you stumble across at 2am?

On Foolish Child #93: Asexuality:

The Laughing in the Key Of Ace Award to Rosehips and Kris:

Has there ever been something so relatable on this site??? Now I am laughing in the key of ace, but I get what you’re talking about.

On Smoochy Wow-Wow and 71 Other Names We Use for Our Pets in Private:

The Grumpy Loaf Award to Anna:

My family had a cat who’s real name was Katie, which devolved into Katie B, and ultimately Bumble Bee Tuna. Eventually it turned into my sisters and I all calling each other bumbles. We currently have a cat named Stella who also goes by: – Miss Bum (the newest addition to the mix) – Speed Kitten – Stelly Belly – Grumble Muffin – Cinnamon or Grumpy Loaf (dependent on the mood) theres probably hundreds more.

And the Life, the Universe, and Everything Award to Rachel:

feeling really seen by 1 and 62 in that i also tend not to use names for my pets so much as interrogate them (“why are you so tiny? how did you get so small? don’t you want to be big? i can’t even see you without a microscope. are you allowed to be that tiny?”)

On 15 Robes for Gay Divorcées:

The Life of Style Award to Katrina:

I think Robes No. 7 & 9 best suit my style, though I’ve always loved a dramatic lounging robe (foreshadowing?!). Since becoming a gay divorcée I’ve also leaned heavily into glittery accessories, collecting houseplants, and crying while reading Maggie Nelson in the bathtub.


Before you go! It takes funding to keep this publication by and for queer women and trans people of all genders running every day. And A+ members keep the majority of our site free for everyone. Still, 99.9% of our readers are not members. A+ membership starts at just $4/month. If you're able to, will you join A+ and keep Autostraddle here and working for everyone?

Queer Girl is your number one fan. She's a fat feminist from California who doodles hearts in the corners of her Gay Agenda. She's working on a children's book, she's on Twitter, and she thinks you should drink more water! She also wants to make you laugh.

queer has written 239 articles for us.

5 Comments

  1. Cyrus😍😍😍

    So I woke up from a dream where Riese was asking a filled auditorium about her first zine to find I’m sharing an award with her and Sally for something we said a few years ago.

    So…thank you for the timelift out of the pandemic, Riese.

Contribute to the conversation...

Yay! You've decided to leave a comment. That's fantastic. Please keep in mind that comments are moderated by the guidelines laid out in our comment policy. Let's have a personal and meaningful conversation and thanks for stopping by!