Take This Survey About Fighting In Your Lesbian Relationship

There’s lots of data out there about what heterosexual couples fight about, but there’s not a whole lot out there about what queer couples fight about. THAT CHANGES TODAY. We wanna know more about the role fighting, bickering and squabbling plays in your relationship — how often you fight, what you fight about, the whole she-bang.

So, if you’re a woman of any sexual orientation in a relationship with another woman-identified person of any sexual orientation and you have 10-15 minutes to tell us a little bit about your life, we promise it’ll result in some very cool articles!

Here’s the Link!

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

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The Editors

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  1. I love these things, I wish I could spend my whole life filling in surveys about the specific quirks of my own gay existence

  2. surveys, next to nothing known about us. a fantastic way to passive aggressively tell a community that they don’t matter. Good job autostraddle for putting this together!! and good job audience for taking the time to fill this out!

  3. Who decided that a relationship where a woman of any sexual orientation in a relationship with another woman-identified person of any sexual orientation equaled a “lesbian couple”? I somehow missed that memo. I’d never use that language to describe my relationship.

    • I would guess that it’s the SEO in the headline thing! And that the longer description wouldn’t fit up there. WOASOIARWAWIPOASO as an abbreviation probably wouldn’t have gotten the point across any better than “lesbian”. I predict the results article may also use simplified language in the headline but be explicitly inclusive in the body.

      • If SEO is so important, why is it only used some of the time and on things like surveys where I would imagine Autostraddle would want as many people to be inclined to taking it as possible and not on other things? Also, I would love a response from someone from Autostraddle about this as well as other readers. :)

    • In on the former surveys there was a dislaimer that the name of the survey is for headline purposes. I can understand this is survey context.

      However, there was a discussion in connection with one previous article about using the phrase “lesbian relationship” to mean all relationships between two women. The staff really wasn’t great about it, essentially just saying, “but that is what the word MEANS, relationship between two women!” even after several non-lesbian women in relationships with women, including me, had lenghtly explained their problems with the term. It was really disheartening and made me very angry. (Unfortunately I couldn’t find the discussion now, it was cut short by admins, or at least for me the “Reply to this comment”-button disappeared after a point.)

      However! I am a great believer in Autostraddles ability to grow and better itself, and trust that if the discussion were to be had today, the staff would not comment this way. This is also why I stayed an A+-member even after this. Hope that the discussion continues.

      (To make things clear, my issue is with the erasing and belittling staff comments in the earlier discussion, not this specific headline.)

  4. Why is this survey closed to nonbinary people?

    (This isn’t an accusation, I trust you have a good reason)

  5. Oh fuck, I did the survey before reading the description – I’m woman-identified but my partner is non-binary trans so… sorry for throwing a wrench in your survey gears I guess.

  6. This is a toughie because I mentally categorize “discussions starting with a disagreement where we either agree to disagree or find a workable solution” as “discussions.” (Are those fights?) By my definition I hardly ever fight – that’s when no solution or agree-to-disagree is reached, or if voices get raised.

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