“I have a relationship to myself first. If that relationship isn’t solid and healthy I’m not good with anyone.”
How a 23-year-old bisexual polyamorous nonbinary femme xicanx in two very loving relationships does poly.
“There are people who, when I say I have a chronic illness and try to talk about it, will be like ‘Well, you’re just an adult now.’ I mean, yes, but also, this is real. It does keep me at home a lot. I do have a weakened immune system. I’m not making this up.”
How a a 28-year-old white genderfluid bisexual in recovery from an eating disorder/anxiety/depression does polyamory.
Here’s how a 28-year-old Arab-American queer demisexual cis woman living in the urban Midwest does ethical non-monogamy.
“We met on the first day of high school. I was drawn to her for some reason. She was reading; that might have been it. She had glasses; that could have been it, too.”
“Boats have also been incredibly healing for me and have really helped me create better relationships in all parts of my life. They make me work harder to maintain my friendships, be better at communication, and generally just better at existing around all different kinds of people.”
How a a 28-year-old Chicana pansexual cis woman living in the Midwest, working in the sex industry, and in a long-term queer platonic relationship does poly.
How a newly-into-ladies 32-year-old multiracial cis queer lady in a big blue city in the deep red American South does poly.
“I view polyamory as a structure that’s helpful in me decolonizing my love life and the way I view relationships. Having complete ownership of everything within the borders of my skin, and doing what I desire with it and with whom, is an incredible “fuck you” to the systems of oppression I seek to dismantle (and a fun one!).”
Here’s how a 32-year-old Japanese American queer polyamorous Southern Californian does polyamory within functional monogamy.
We thrive on these everyday tiny moments where we both get to be reminded of our agreed-upon power differential.
“Family and friends tend to recognize her and her boyfriend and pretend that I don’t exist, mostly because they have been together longer and queer relationships are not respected or recognized.”
Here’s how a 23-year-old native and Jewish queer trans woman with Cerebral Palsy living in Baltimore and dating a few people does poly.
“I’ve written them a letter about feeling like I’m getting the short end of the stick, but I’m afraid that it comes off as a break-up letter and I don’t want to break up with them. I really just want to be happy with them.”
“Love in partnership as colonized/racialized bodies is courageously undressing the walls we have built to survive and showing others the chaos that war has left behind.”
“Being queer, Asian-American, femme, and gray ace — this is my identity and I get to choose what that means to me.”
I have to be willing to reveal the messy, intimate parts of my life to have this authority exchange really work 24/7. Otherwise, it just isn’t sustainable.
Here’s how a 33-year-old queer, polyamorous, white, trans woman living in Chicago who’s married and has a long-term girlfriend does poly.
Be the daddy you want to see in the world.