Playlist: I’ve Got A Crush On Your Dumb Face

You guys. I have a crush. It’s a big one, but I can’t help it! She’s such a dreamboat, I don’t know how I’m expected to function normally, I mean honestly. This is not my natural state of being; usually I find a way to move forward one way or another, but this situation is a little extraordinary. I am so over the moon, it’s disgusting. I feel like this stock image of a girl in the rain with a gross green smoothie looking DONE WITH EVERYTHING.


GPOY, I quit

Is it hopeless? Pretty much definitely! But we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into hopeless limerence.

Anyway, here are some songs about crushes with some songs about banging thrown in because songs about banging are the spice of life. Also please talk about your crush (or your favorite crush song) in the comments. Let’s all hold each other platonically until we can get our romantic lives sorted out.

I’ve Got A Crush On Your Dumb Face

Stream it here!

I Think I Love You – The Partridge Family
One Thing – One Direction
The Purple Bottle – Animal Collective
She’s The One – Shonen Knife
I Want You To Want Me – Letters To Cleo
A Little Less Conversation – Elvis Presley
Be My Baby – The Ronettes
I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend (featuring Angel Deradoorian) – Angel Deradoorian & Discovery
Can You Tell – Ra Ra Riot
Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa – Vampire Weekend
Little Bit – Lykke Li
Drunk In Love – Angel Haze
I Don’t Wanna Dance On My Own (Whitney Houston vs. Robyn) – Chambaland
Drove Me Wild – Tegan & Sara
Giving Me Away – Betty Who
Cassette Tape – Katie Costello
I Wanna Hold Your Hand – The Beatles
The Waiting – Angel Olsen
Crush – 3G’s
Sittin’ Up In My Room – Brandy
Diggin’ On You – TLC
Crush – Mandy Moore
There She Goes – Sixpence None The Richer
Crush on You, or “Good Morning!” an Ode to Steve – Super Desserts

I’ve Got A Crush On Your Dumb Face from Autostraddle on 8tracks Radio.

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Intern Grace

Grace Ellis has been writing and making hack-job graphics for Autostraddle since 2011 and is a co-creator and co-writer of the comic book series Lumberjanes. She is mostly an intern in name only. (Mostly.) She lives in Columbus, Ohio because why anything. Also, she wants to write the Black Widow movie and feels like if she just keeps telling people, eventually she will be allowed to do it. She has a Twitter and a Tumblr, both of which are pretty above average.

Grace has written 89 articles for us.


  1. Yeah I’m crushing hard on a girl for the first time since a bad breakup. I’m terrified to make a move for fear of getting hurt or fear of it going right.. either way I’m crushing hard… and she is right back.

  2. Ohhh, Crush by Mandy Moore…. used to listen to that one on repeat in middle school.

  3. I found out today that I do in fact still have a crush on someone who I’ve been crushing on on and off (but mostly on) for 3.5 years :P Not to mention I’ve had a habit of developing ridiculous unrequited crushes. Basically: this playlist is perfect for me, thank you!

    • OH I’ve just remembered – my ultimate crush song is My Junk from Spring Awakening; I remember listening to it on repeat in the midst of a crush attack and texting my friend about how it made me feel (I was 17, ok).
      Also She’s A Rebel by Green Day, because I really thought it described my crush at the time (although time has revealed that she isn’t that similar to the girl in the song after all). I went through a ridiculous period during the school holidays when I would listen to it on repeat and feel angsty about not having seen her for such a long time.

  4. i have a crush on this girl that i keep seeing drinking green smoothies on rainy days. who is she? why is she so committed to nutrition? what if i gave her a hot chocolate?

  5. I have a crush on this super hot lesbian bartender and also my friend and also my ex and also this cute girl I’ve been chatting with on okc I HAVE A PROBLEM HELP

    In other news I also now have a crush on Intern Grace for including The Purple Bottle in this playlist.

    I vote for adding “I Wanna Be Yours” by the Arctic Monkeys, because even though it sounds a little melancholy, one of the lines is “If you like your coffee hot
    Let me be your coffee pot” and I love it.

  6. yesss “can you tell” = crush song of my life

    the discovery cover, “can you discover” = also really great

    DID I record a lovelorn acoustic cover of my own, one lonely, crush-saturated night, in the winter of my twentieth year?

    could be

    oh baby baby baby baaaaaabe

  7. You already have Tegan and Sara on there, but Closer is a great crush song.

    Also I have a giant crush and I may or may not talk about how much I love cheesecake and babies around her and have no way of stopping myself. But she likes me back and is not shy to tell me and so that just further fuels the let’s eat cheesecake and go to cute coffee shops together banter.

  8. Closer is a great crush song.

    I have a massive crush on two ladies of the same name and both crush-situations have gotten to the point of mindless awkward babbling whenever we speak. I cannot get it together to save my life.

  9. What perfect timing! Intern Grace, how did you know I’m going on a first date with this very cute girl from okcupid this afternoon and have been distractedly-nervous all day?!

  10. Good crush songs- just about thwhing by Prince (I Wanna Be Your Lover, Kiss, If I was Your Girlfriend, etc.). I am also partial to “Sunshowers” by Dr Buzzard’s Original Savannah Band. I keep daydreaming about singing that to this ladyhuman… oooph. Today at one point I found myself walking down a crowded hallway muttering “WHY is she so
    beautiful?” at the heavens.
    I am however, juggling torches at this point (I’m coming to terms with my poly tendencies for the first time). I also, for the record, have a crush on pimento cheese.

  11. omigoodness…. lol I’m having the ‘i cannot function normally’ issue at this very moment. We were crushing on each other for months then we started actually dating a couple days ago. And I cannot stop thinking about her. I keep trying to refrain from texting her…. I may have to leave my cell in another room….

  12. I’ve been crushing on this one girl for months and I’ve fallen on my face trying to impress her so that shows how well all of this is going (on the plus side, the few people who know are super supportive and keep trying to play me up to her as someone super fantastic (even though i’m not) so yayy people!)and she’s really cute and kinda shy and pretty much a smart ass and has a pretty smile and knows about all my junk and treats me good still and i don’t know that makes me feel less monster and she’s marvelous just yep

    (For my crush song, well I hear “I’m Just Your Problem” by Marceline when I see her cause angst is where I live apparently and also The Engine Driver by the Decemberists sometimes cause reasons)

  13. How is “I’ve just seen a face” by the Beatles not on this list?

  14. This is so perfect! You & I by Ingrid Michaelson is probably the cutest and fluffiest crush song there is.
    I am also ridiculously in crush. She just makes me smile and feel so sunny & like myself when I’m with her. So it breaks my heart a little whenever she talks about guys she likes. Sigh…

  15. This playlist is exactly what I needed today!

    I have a ridiculous obsessive crush on this amazing drop dead gorgeous girl and *fingers crossed* it might be mutual. But pretty much she is all that occupies my thoughts at the moment.

  16. CRUSH CRUSH CRUSH by Paramore. I dedicate this playlist to the girls I have a crush on.

  17. OH MY GOD GRACE. My big stupid crush literally just played “The Purple Bottle” a few days ago. I mean, mostly it was because we were talking about how a lot of dildos are purple, but ALSO ALSO it must be fate.

  18. found out last night that my crush since last october is a goooooooood kisser. love this thread and all the comments are adorable. AS wins 5ever.

  19. I’ve got a crush and it is kind of bad. we haven’t hung out outside of work yet but I’m working on it and fingers crossed it’s mutual!
    My favorite crush songs are First Person and Last Person by Jenny Owen Youngs. I can sort of play the former on ukulele terribly.

  20. So timely! How did you know??!

    And yes, Closer by Tegan and Sara is a good crush song.

  21. how did you know autostraddle, how did you know.
    also, if your crush is in more of the hopelessly unrequited situation, id recommend listening to no ones gonna love you by band of horses and crying

  22. This comment recognizes and applauds the shameless Great Gatsby reference! It happens to the best of us.

  23. All together, what has been my everyday for a while now. I’m watching true blood but it’s not really helping. Too good!

  24. I couldn’t even get through the whole playlist…. YOU PUT ONE DIRECTION ON HERE I LOVE YOU FOREVER. I need to finish reading this list because clearly you’re excellent with songs.

    Now I have to get back to my gross green smoothie. And my newfound crush on Grace.

  25. I’ve got a crush on a cute Mod girl I met on Tumblr and she’s got a crush on me too… but she lives so far away in the middle of nowhere it seems destined to never happen. ): Such is life. I’d like to dedicate “Shelter Song” to her because it’s both one of my current favorite songs and probably the most pretentious crush song ever written. Seriously, the lyrics include the line “I wrote a song for thee”.


  26. I’ve been crushing on this one girl for what seems like the longest crush ever. I don’t know if I get more nervous when she’s around me or when I’m around her, but whatever, obviously nothing will happen because I’m just so awkward and weird. Plus I have trouble reading her or she’s messing with me.

    And now there is this new crush, met her once about a month a go and have recently seen her around a lot these days. I don’t know if she remembers me but I do remember her and would love to engage in a convo with her someday.

    Thanks for this post. Needed this little venting sesh. Plus its amazing how many songs can suddenly remind you of a crush. This then leads to overthinking and all kinds of crazy emotions. Oh feelings, why must you be so difficult to understand?

  27. Ooh this so applies to me right now! I have this horrible crush that is doomed to never be on my friend and it’s both the best and the worst at the same time. Sometimes I want to wrap her up in a soft blanket and cuddle the shit out of her and other times I want to… well more than cuddle. As Ariel’s sister would say “she’s got it bad.” Uug, crushes. So many feels.

  28. Crush! TUNE.

    Thank you, this is amazing! Will stream it while I work :D

    I wooed my now-girlfriend with mixtapes (as you do) which gradually got more and more obvious, culminating in one pretty much like this. It had Low Self Control by Mirah and you know what she *STILL* didn’t get it.

    I mean!!!!

  29. Grace, girl, I FEEL YOU. And I needed this today. I’m currently crushing HARD on this woman who is literally 5 kinds of unavailable. Namely:
    – she’s straight
    – she’s married
    – she and her husband are moving to another country in a month
    – she’s ten years older than me
    – I was introduced to her by my professor/boss because they went to high school together, and she and I were in a play together.

    May I humbly suggest some additions to you crushed out playlist?

    – Accidentally in Love, by the Counting Crows. It’ll make you feel upbeat and cheery about your unrequited love!
    – If you’re feeling more melancholic, I’d recommend Someone Like You from the Jekyll & Hyde: The Musical soundtrack. Sounds weird, I know, but trust me on this one.
    – And of course, a musical staple for unrequited crushes – I’m Not That Girl from Wicked.

    • SO MANY THINGS to say to this….

      See I thought all five of those things meant something at one point in time…

      Until I started seeing someone who was “straight”, married, moving away (at that time 1 year from when we met), was 9 years older than me, and played on my derby team as a regular alternate.

      The affair went on until she moved. And somewhat a little after that…. I am totally a horrible person. And probably not too helpful in your quest to get over said person.

  30. Question for the group! Any tips on falling for a superior at work? It’s not enough to be brave and to say something because we have professional work rules to follow. Even if I think she is totally crushing back it would be harder for her due to these professional rules.
    Any tips would be so helpful!

    Song wise: give me a reason by pink or I choose you by sarah barrieles.

  31. My playlist, although I’m between crushes:

    • Loneliness is Worse by Veruca Salt

    • Professional Outsiders by The Ropes

    • Undenied by Portishead

    • Destroy Everything You Touch by Ladytron

    • Lover by Cross My Heart Hope To Die

    • #1 Crush by Garbage

    • Crack the Liars Smile by Drain STH

    • Fast as You Can by Fiona Apple

    I just listened to these songs, in this order,
    and I can say to you loves, this is how I feel.

  32. I actually super needed this playlist right now. I’m crushing really ridiculously hard on a girl with marvelous eyebrows, and really marvelous everything, I mean she is so attractive I can’t even handle it, and she quoted Dickens at me. We’re trapped in the flux between not actually dating, but we’re not “just friends” either, but I don’t know if she even feels the way for me that I do about her, and it’s causing me confusion and creating the need to eat chocolate and sob while listening to buckets of angsty queer music. But this playlist helped.

  33. I clutched my heart when “Little Bit” came on. Ugh.

    I’m in a complicated probably-mutual-crush-situation. Which you’d think would be good, but for a person with romantic anxiety no.

  34. Ugh ugh ugh.

    My first real crush/first super weird romantic friend came in to town with no notice the other night. She asked to hang out so I took her to a few cool places downtown to grab a drink. I worked early the next day so I drove her back to her dad’s house a little after ten.

    She asked if we could split a cigarette before she went inside and I said sure.

    Then she told me she wanted to kiss me and asked if it was okay.

    Then we kissed for a while.

    Then she asked if we could hook up.

    Two and half hours later, we were saying goodbye in the back of my mini van (I know you guys, I drive my moms old mini van).

    Now she’s back in California and my brain and heart are spinning and high school me can’t believe it at all.


    this is so extremely relevant to my life oh my god
    i have a stupid crush on my new friend that i also am really invested in staying friends with
    because shes adorable and funny and we have a ton of crap in common and she’s also into girls
    but alas i am about to leave for college and this crush is doomed because i get way too attached to friends to risk losing them over crushes

  36. Everywhere – Fleetwood Mac

    Sugar Rush – A*Teens

    Everything You Do – M2M

    Kiss You- One Direction

    Crush – Mandy Moore —- MY FOREVER FAVORITE CRUSH SONG <3

    I crush like a teenager.

    Also I have this ridiculous crush on this girl on the other side of the world I've never met and might not even meet. It's driving me nuts!!! I am just hoping the crush goddesses will make our paths cross.

  37. Appropriate playlist – just moved to a new city and contemplating what I know is a crush-in-development. But first I have to figure out how to talk to her.. sigh

  38. OMG, yes at the Mandy Moore Crush song. I had almost forgotten about it… those were the days!

  39. Nat, what is this Welcome to Night Vale you speak of? Is this some sort of Canadian shit you were trying to explain to me at camp? :) I’ll look it up!

  40. i love this website but i normally don’t have much to say except for the music posts. i had to bother the Autostraddle tech support to help me retrieve my old username (forgot it, but my old netscape email add was deactivated too) just so i can log in to comment here.

    someone above mentioned Accidentally in Love. yes. perfect song. i actually sung it at karaoke in 2011 with my ex a few weeks before we got together.

    right now i have an insane crush on someone and this is a very opportune post. i actually saw this when it was posted, but it took a few weeks to get my password, and procrastination a few more days to finally post something.

    someone above also mentioned No One’s Ever Gonna Love You by Band of Horses. i did play that on my phone to my crush, but i don’t think she got the message. haha.

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