All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.
Welcome to NSFW Sunday!
Zara Mirkin and Maya Toledano/Lonely Label via refinery29
+ Tits and Sass has two excerpts from Coming Out Like A Porn Star, edited by Jiz Lee. In their contribution, Milcah Halili Orbacedo writes:
“That day, the clenched hand was a thing of beauty, something that gave me joy. Mz’s fist in me made me feel like a beloved queen. I left my drunken and dazed state to cast my eyes down on my pussy. I remember most the shock I felt when I witnessed Mz’s black-gloved hand gliding effortlessly in and out of my own body. I felt like I was inside of a lucid dream.
Never had I ever I been pussy punched before. The production crew lubed me up well, but it wasn’t just that. I was extremely wet. No matter what Mz did, even if she humiliated me and cattle prodded me, it aroused me because she stayed within my limits, and I felt heard and held. The element of consent made me open with such a force I could take anything in and alchemize it into a positive and pleasurable experience.”
Mimi by photographer Ilya Fleet via thelingerieaddict.tumblr
+ Jara Kyrs, a trans sex worker with a strategic business plan, was profiled in Buzzfeed:
“Krys, who’s Latina herself, feels that there’s a fundamental problem with the sex work narrative. ‘There’s a huge stigma associated with being a sex worker,’ she says. ‘It puts the blame on the women who become sex workers and not on the system that forced them into sex work, which makes it impossible to affect any real change.’ Krys believes that sex workers shouldn’t be categorically pitied, nor should sex work be seen as a disgraceful way to earn a living. Her candor defies preconceptions about the underground nature of the sex industry. She’s talked about her work in several Philly news outlets and on social media, where she lists her profession as ‘transgender model and entertainer.'”
+ There are tumblrs out there that aren’t for porn?
+ This pre-electrosex checklist includes removing piercings and jewelry, double-checking your equipment, reviewing safe targets and more.
via altblackgirls
+ Vulvas get “blue balls” too.
+ Here’s the sex diary of a 23-year-old bisexual babysitter in Harlem.
via models of color
+ Sexual peaks do not exist: “The main problem with sexual peaks—and it’s kind of a big one—is that they don’t actually exist. There’s no biologically encoded sell-by date on anyone’s genitalia and no specific age at which nature dictates hot sex is no longer for you.”
+ People in happy long-term relationships are really good at talking and sex:
“Quick, dim the lights: A large-scale study of sexual satisfaction and overall happiness in long-term couples found that the happiest couples do two things better than you: fuck and talk (about fucking). They also do lots of different sex moves, including oral, and give each other orgasms. And when these things are standard in the relationship, people report greater happiness over the long haul, even after getting totally used to each other.”
via femmethings
+ It is hard to date as a transfeminine girl between bodies:
“I found myself a little resentful of an easy world of types and labels – twinks and bears, tops and bottoms – which gay men inherit and for which there are no trans equivalents. I, being the wonderfully liberated non-binary trans femme I am, realise there’s probably more fluidity in some gay men’s sexuality than they realise. But is it for me to prepare and rehearse a recital of my own complex history to break down such walls in people I have yet to meet?”
+ At the Rumpus, an essay about the very complicated nature of consensual non-consent in BDSM, vanilla play, and writing:
“BDSM, like writing, can be so self-serious. By letting go of my formal commitment to both, I found ways to release my expectations, and as a result, let them back into my life in healthier and more fulfilling ways. When I stopped worrying about whether or not my newly vanilla sex life was doing a disservice to my essential self, I rediscovered the most essential element of BDSM—play. Without the ritual and formality of dungeons, props, and contracts, my partner and I began to learn how to play together, in a way that is totally unique to us. And when I wasn’t laser-focused on writing as a lifestyle, I suddenly found that I could write freely again.”
Denise Bidot and Precious Lee via beyond the curve
+ From the Autostraddle Lesbian Sex Archives: you are not a piece of shit and it’s okay to leave someone who treats you like you are:
“This is something you might want to read if you need the courage to leave someone that occasionally treats you like a piece of shit. This person is great. They are smart and sexy and funny and when they’re not being an asshole, they are the exact opposite of an asshole. They are kind and loving when they’re not being mean and withholding. They are everything you’ve ever wanted in a partner plus a bunch of stuff you don’t. They are the person you’ve heard other people talk about but didn’t believe they existed. You didn’t think a person like that could happen to you and then they did. And they were intoxicating. You drank them up even though they only gave you sips. You weren’t cocky enough to believe you were different than everyone else but you were silly enough to believe they were different with you.”
Also, here are some lesbian sex scenes in pools for you.
Jayde Pierce via womenofcolor
all i ever want is to read the “writing while deviant” series on the rumpus… but it never loads.
the long-term relationships and sexual peaks articles were pretty interesting to me, although they’re both pretty heteronormative/monoga-centric.
Personally, I’d take the porn tumblrs over many of the really nasty non-porn tumblrs I’ve seen. :p
*Is* ‘blue vulva’ the same? I’ve never had testicles so no idea, but the way ‘blue balls’ is described sounds much more uncomfortable/painful than anything I’ve experienced. (OBVIOUSLY this needs to be on the next survey.)
I think the discomfort of ‘blue balls’ may be overstated bc cis dudes are trying to pressure their partners into having sex and/or bc they have been conditioned to think they must always get what they want right now. I have never had testicles either though, maybe we just don’t understand…
Hi, I’m trans, I’ve got testicles (what a way to introduce myself into a conversation!) and in my experience, blue balls are basically a myth. Or, at least the way men want you to think blue balls feels is a myth. Slight discomfort, sure, but it’s not like it’s not something men can’t just take care of themselves anyway.
I can’t compare since I’ve never had testicles, but I have occasionally gotten very sharp pains in my vulva due to this phenomenon. I’m sure it’s different for everyone.
There are tumblrs out there that aren’t for porn but I swear it’s they all become porn or have something erotic eventually.
Fangirls y’all, fangirls.
What has been seen cannot be unseen.
“I, being the wonderfully liberated non-binary trans femme I am, realise there’s probably more fluidity in some gay men’s sexuality than they realise. But is it for me to prepare and rehearse a recital of my own complex history to break down such walls in people I have yet to meet?”
This quote gives me hives. No, it’s not for you, and not simply because of time involved as the quote finishes out in the article. Presuming the level of sexual fluidity of ANYONE other than yourself and attempting to weasel your way past or “break down” their stated sexual boundaries is incredibly sleazy, full stop.