Jim Douglas Can Suck It. Also, Rachel & Dolly Are Supreme Beings

Hello everybody! It’s a super Funday here on Autostraddle. We published Hi! I’m Crystal from Australia yesterday and in just a few hours our photoblogger Robin will make her big Autostraddle debut. If you are jonesing for a fix however do not fret or call Ken Seely just yet. I have lots of douchebags to tell you about, and also some fun stuff.71274855

1. Today in Extreme EPIC DOUCHEBAGGERY: Gov. Jim Douglas, R-Vermont, says he will veto the same-sex marriage bill if it passes the Legislature … He said he made the announcement to stop speculation and to focus attention on economy.”

I’m not entirely fucking sure how VETOING a f*cking BILL THAT PROMOTES EQUAL RIGHTS FOR ALL HUMAN BEINGS takes MORE FOCUS than just DOING NOTHING and letting the bill PASS. You know? Just saying. ZOMG.

(@wcax vermont)

1a. Today in Significant Douchebaggery: key senator leaning against reviving civil unions bill in Hawaii. Without Democratic State Sen. Brian Taniguchi’s support, it’s unlikely the bill will be revived, and Taniguchi says the Governor would veto the bill anyhow.

A fabulous snippet from Bishop Carl E. Harris, one of dozens of opponents of civil unions who gathered at the Capital yesterday, in response to comparisons being made between civil unions and the civil rights movement:

“Can what is termed as ‘hate crimes’ by the gay community, really due to an outcry against their alternative lifestyle, be compared to being water-hosed down, burned, homes burned, beaten, lynched, merely for being born the wrong color? Former homosexual? It’s been done, and that’s possible. Former black? Never. It’s not possible.”

There you go! Though I agree that it’s not a fair comparison, I think he lost me at “former homosexual? It’s been done, and that’s possible.” (@the honolulu advertiser)

1c. Today in Considerable Douchebaggery:
The New York City Department of Youth and Community Development has failed to consider $253,718 in funding for Sylvia’s Place, a project of MCCNY Homeless Youth Services, thus jeopardizing the welfare of over 1,000 homeless and runaway LGBTQ youth in the coming year who would rely on Sylvia’s Place services. (@queers united)

There is only one way to fix this problem as I see it:push it

2. I don’t know about you, but I need a cocktail. Let’s have one with the Best Lesbian of All Time Rachel Maddow on “Late Night with Jimmy Fallon”:

3. Lesbians: they know how to move your shit. Read all about it – “Stuff Lesbians Like: Efficiency I agree. (@grace the spot)

4. Dear Kelly Clarkson et al., here’s an example of how to brush off lesbian rumors with conviction, therefore leaving your credibility and amazingness intact (in response to accusations that Parton and her BFF are more than friends):

“We’re absolutely, totally honest, open, and comfortable with each other … we’ve been accused of being lovers. We do love each other, but we’ve never been like that.” (Dolly Parton)

Vintage 2006 Dolly Parton, in response to the hate mail she received for being a gay icon:  “Some people are blind or ignorant, and you can’t be that prejudiced and hateful and go through this world and still be happy. It’s all right to be who you are.” (@pinknews uk)

5. ABC News’s “What Would You Do?” asks “What would you do if you witnessed a gay bashing in the making?”: ABC News Tests Tolerance, With Surprising Results. (@the advocate)

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Riese is the 41-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3203 articles for us.


  1. I was just about to email you the link about the stupid fucking Vermont situation. Beat me to the punch. PUN FULLY INTENDED.

  2. the ‘what would you do’ clip was GREAT. loved the one guy, “i’d rather have 12 of you than 4 of him”. i mean, i don’t know where he’s getting his figures, but i appreciate the sentiment.
    thank you for buffering the douchebaggery w/ Rachel and liquor. i almost wish the douchebaggery posts had special graphics or a fancy banner. like what keith olberman does with his ‘worst person’ segment? it could be a drawing of a douchebag, w/ a picture of Jim Douglas’s head superimposed on the top, w/ little arms and legs…
    i’ve given this some thought.

  3. i fully loved the ‘What would you do’ clip. and i kinda think Rachel had been drinking before making that drink. she was spilling stuff all over the place. thats my goal in life…to be on national tv while drunk. it seems exciting.

    • i think my goal in life is to be in a haviland & riese vlog while sober? Actually wait I have done a few sober. I was somewhat drunk during the first episode of Lezberado. I wonder if that counts as national television.

  4. Um okay Alex and I just had to pause the WWYD tape … can we talk about how the into voiceover said that the reason for the same sex marriage debate heating up was because of SEAN PENN’S MOVING PERFORMANCE IN THE MOVIE MILK? That was so silly! We were totally cool about not having equal rights but after Sean Penn’s moving performance, we’ve TAKEN TO THE STREETS! Suddenly we looked one another in the eye and thought … omg, I want rights, Sean Penn was soooo good.

    Anyhow the rest of that was really impressive. I was surprised. Go Jersey!

  5. *douchebags make me sad/angry
    *maddow makes me smile
    *hate country music but LOVE dolly (srsly, she’s adorable)
    *WWYD tape: confusing but surprising…like riese (and alex), i dont recall only deciding to want equal rights after seeing sean penn in milk. and even though ppl stood up to the “harasser”, for some, it wasn’t b/c of what he was saying but the fact that he was being annoying about it. oh and the guy that went from being “disgusted” to “i don’t care” changed cause he didnt wanna be embarrassed on tv, plain and simple. but the others were awesome…but i could only think this b/c it’s currently 6:30am (EDT) and i’ve been up since 4am with only 4hrs of sleep…

  6. I appreciate the douchebag segments.
    A lot of people just want to focus on positive things and talk about who’s got our back. In some ways it’s more important to know who’s ready to stab us in it.

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