Kristen Stewart Kicks Ass, Looks Gay as Hell in the First “Charlie’s Angels” Trailer

The trailer for the new Charlie’s Angels just landed and I’m more convinced than ever that Kristen Stewart is going to be gay as all hell in it. First of all, why are you dropping it the very day World Pride starts, on the 50th anniversary of Stonewall, if that’s not true? Second of all, her hair. Third of all, her swagger. Fourth of all, the way she says to another woman, “How did that feel, because it looks like it felt really good.” Fifth of all, the trailer kicks right off with Janelle Monae’s “Make Me Feel,” the gayest song ever recorded. Sixth of all, half of all gay women over the age of 30 are gay because of Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle, so the only place to go from there is maintext. Seventh of all, it’s 2019 and it’d be bananas to have three women on-screen together without one of them being queer. Eighth of all, I want what I want.I REST MY CASE.

See you in the theater in November, ya queers.

Heather Hogan is an Autostraddle managing editor who lives in New York City with her partner, Stacy, and their cackle of rescued pets. She's a member of the Television Critics Association, the Gay and Lesbian Entertainment Critics Association, and a Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer critic. You can also find her on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

Heather has written 882 articles for us.

26 Comments

  1. While they show Jane (Ella Balinska) getting a love interest in the nerdy guy, they don’t show Sabina (Kristen Stewart) or Elena (Naomi Scott) getting one. I hope that they are each others. That would also bode well for Trimberly if they ever get that “Power Rangers” sequel off of the ground.

  2. Preteen me in 2000: Drew Barrymore in Charlie’s Angels *heart eyes*

    20-something me in 2019: Kristen Stewart in Charlie’s Angels *heart eyes*

    We’ve come full circle

  3. Omfggg I had no idea this movie was being made!! 2000 & 2003 Charlie’s angels were def some of my faves growing up and one of the first times I remember lusting after women! Wow I can’t wait to watch this!

  4. I owe my preteen awakenings to Wonder Woman and the OG Angels. Nostalgia wasn’t enough for me to really enjoy the early 2k’s reboot, but this one looks like it might have the right mix of camp and kickassery to be worth the watch.

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