JoJo Siwa and Her Girlfriend Kylie Want To Tell You Absolutely Everything About Their Courtship

In this 90-minute video recording of JoJo Siwa’s mother’s apparent podcast “Success With Jess,” we find our bubbly protagonist, erstwhile reality star and current entrepreneur / movie star / recording artist / hairbow enthusiast JoJo Siwa, exploding with happiness on the sofa with her girlfriend, Kylie, who keeps a hoodied arm slung around JoJo for the parts of the interview in which they are not simply clutching each other’s hands or staring at one another with undying, eternal, long-lasting devotion.

Why, one may ask, did I witness (“watch” is probably generous, as I multi-task fairly aggressively) a 90-minute video of JoJo Siwa and Kylie being interviewed by JoJo’s Mom about their relationship and how Kylie became JoJo’s girlfriend? In order to do so, my eyes were forced to endure a morally suspect number of motivational signs, often coated in glitter, adorning the tightly-packed gallery wall of the podcast room.

JoJo Siwa and Kylie in her mother's office doing an interview

I truly don’t know, but y’all it was really fucking cute! It’s rare to experience this level of personal disclosure about a lesbian relationship from anybody, let alone a famous person, let alone a young famous person, let alone a famous person with a popular line of children’s apparel at Wal-Mart. Like many of you I had no idea that JoJo Siwa existed until she came out earlier this year, at which time I learned that she not only existed, but was perhaps the most well-known Gen Z personality to ever come out as queer. Since then, she’s been incredibly open about all of it, undoubtedly inspiring many of her fans to live their own truths.

I invite you, too, to experience the blissful all-in joy radiated by two teenagers who have never had their hearts broken and sleep in a bedroom made out of actual candy. They have no filter, you see. They want to tell us the story of every moment of their courtship — meeting, crushing, their internal journeys with their own sexualities, Kylie allegedly being a “player” before JoJo came bopping into her life, Face-Timing, butterflies, kissing, holding hands, teasing, all of it. There is a particularly touching story that begins with “So, we were on the Rock and Roll Rollercoaster—” There are moments when the overprotective elder dyke in me wants to say “okay slow down” but then I change my mind every time, recline into my Wayfair couch, and simply smile at the screen and say, “bless their hearts.”

In this video, we learn that JoJo calls Kylie “love bug” and Kylie calls JoJo “pretty girl.” There is a small section devoted to their employment of baby talk that I could not endure, but I’m confident others will find it endearing and relatable. We learn that Kylie, who lives in the Florida Keys, has switched to home-schooling for her senior year of high school in order to spend more time with JoJo. Apparently Kylie came to JoJo’s in May for a two-week visit and did not leave until I don’t know, last week? Listen.

The confidence with which they dispense relationship advice! The steadfast adoration in their starry-eyed gazes! The eagerness with which they actively want to be alive and have in fact never found the world to be more full of awe and wonder than it is at this very moment! “I didn’t realize til the end but I was smiling the whole time,” wrote one YouTube commenter. Honestly, somehow, same?

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Riese is the 39-year-old Co-Founder and CEO of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, blogger, fictionist, copywriter, video-maker and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and then headed West. Her work has appeared in nine books including "The Bigger the Better The Tighter The Sweater: 21 Funny Women on Beauty, Body Image & Other Hazards Of Being Female," magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 2885 articles for us.

12 Comments

  1. Once again Reese, thank you for your service. I could not watch more than 3 minutes in a row but I did jump through it and yes, they are adorable and I am glad that they and their starry-eyed energy exists in the world.

    I also hope they turn off the cameras when their (almost certain to be inevitable) breakup comes and that they stay close and end up standing up in each other’s weddings when they are (much) older but still a little starry-eyed.

  2. Truly folks there is nothing worse when you’re young and in love than to have crotchety old people tell you it’s not going to work out. They may or may not figure that out! But coming to the internet’s #1 queer website and finding endless predictions of the dissolution of your beautiful love affair would be a bummer^100.

  3. Once in a blue moon,
    Childhood sweethearts go on to be lifelong partners.
    I’m just going to pray to whatever power in the universe, that this will be true for them.
    And if it’s not, hope their friendship endures.
    And if it doesn’t, hope they learn and grow from this to be better people and better partners.

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