Today, October 21st, is International Fisting Day!
via blushingfemme.tumblr.com
Jiz Lee and Courtney Trouble started International Fisting Day last year after their film, Live Sex Show, was banned and censored for featuring a fisting scene between Lee and Nina Hartley. Lee explains:
“Fisting Day began not only a celebration, but a call for awareness – this sex act is banned and censored in most forms of adult entertainment, and that fear is reflected outside of the sex industry as well.
We believe that sex-positive education, exposure, information, and discussion is an easy cure for this fist-phobia!
That’s why Fisting Day exists, as a day set aside to aid in the debunking of the myth that fisting is inherently painful, obscene, or wrong. Many people enjoy fisting for many reasons, which is why we invite bloggers, writers, photographers, film-makers, adult performers, pornographers, and lovers of sex to participate in this day-long love of fisting by publishing something you’ve made, by saying what you think, for sharing your fisting stories, for trying it out with your partner (or yourself!), for writing a research paper, posting an interview on YouTube or QueerPornTube, or hosting a sex education event in your city on this fantastic subject.”
via modelsofcolor.tumblr.com
So, what is fisting? Fisting is when one partner inserts their entire hand into another partner’s vagina. Done correctly, it feels really good. So how do you do it correctly?
Words by Ali.
First Time Fisting: A Love Story
By Gabby
After sex one night, she said, “I want you to fist me.” “You want me to what you?” I’d just started to almost enjoy the act of eating pussy and wasn’t sure if I could handle any other queer sex acts. For fuck’s sake, I’d just turned 18 and hadn’t even officially come out yet. She was supposed to be the innocent one. The reason I received my first toaster from the National Board of Lesbians was now asking me to fuck her with my fist. Fists. Fists are what I’d ball up while walking on the block listening to DMX daring someone to start something. Fists are what I used to punch my dorm walls because I was too hot tempered and young to know how to properly deal with my anger. How was I supposed to put one inside of the first person to ever tell me that they loved me?
“Maybe” was my final answer. I hoped she’d just drop it. That week between classes and crowded lunches in a cramped dining hall, girlfriend did her research. She found articles on lube, trust techniques and other ways to please your partner. She brought me books with titles like “101 Lesbian Sex Acts.” She kissed me until I ran out of dry underwear and reasons to say no. I still wasn’t sold on fisting but I knew that pleasing her physically helped me show her that I loved her because sometimes I didn’t have the right words to say it. Also, bringing her to orgasm turned me on beyond anything else I’d ever known. My “maybe” turned into an “ok, baby, whatever you need.”
We started on a Monday night, naked, breathless, armed with information and me adding more fingers upon request. Lubing digits upon re-entry and whispering concerns of comfort and questions of continued consent. “Are you ok?” “Does this hurt?” and “Should I keep going?” slipped into our vocabulary. Technically, neither of us were virgins but this felt more like my first time than my actual first time. This felt way more connected and honest. By Thursday, I was wrist deep, my open palm exploring the insides of my girl-woman. Still no balled fist, still on the edge of what she needed, but now I was fully on board. The week of trying built up a level of physical trust that we’d never experienced. Also, holy shit it felt amazing to be that deep inside of her, to find her g-spot and feel it pulse.
Saturday night, we went for it. We started with an hour or so of vaginal warm up because that’s just common courtesy. You can’t just pop a fist at the pussy. You’ve got to get it ready, especially if you’re a beginner. So so so, all of the glorious foreplay on all of the glorious body parts, then my fingers, then my hand and we stayed there in our safe place for a moment. “Keep going,” she said, and so with shaking hands, I lubed up my fist, looked her in the eyes and slowly made my way in. I was so scared and didn’t want to hurt her. But in that moment, we both realized that yes, sex sometimes involves a little pain and a lot of patience. My fist hurt her but she told me not to stop. Deep breaths, gentle movements, more lube and soon we had a serious rhythm going. I was finally fisting her and she came alive under me. Everything stopped around us. I don’t remember anything but this blurred, sweaty feeling of hot disorienting blissful fucking. We weren’t little girls anymore. We were fist-fucking, baby-dyke warriors without fear and sin vergüenza.
Resources
- If you haven’t already, search for fisting on the Kink Academy website. Just do it.
- Porn, especially queer porn (cough The CrashPad Series), is a good resource. Not sure whether you’re into fisting? Not sure what to do with your extra hand when it isn’t holding a bottle of lube? Not convinced gloves are sexy? Porn can help you with that. (If you’re not into video, smut is also great.)
- Related to International Fisting Day, in an interview with She Bop, Jiz Lee talks about fisting myths, tips, lubes and their favourite experiences.
- Also, tonight at 6 p.m. PST a Fisting 101 for All Genders workshop with Tobi Hill-Meyer is live streaming from Queer Porn TV.
- For a workshop you can watch any time, check out Jessica Luxury and Majestic Legay’s Fisting 101 (with subtitles).
- Hand In The Bush: The Fine Art Of Vaginal Fisting, by Deborah Addington, is an extensively illustrated guide. Sex educator Laura Anne Stuart also has two guides, one on the basic mechanics of vaginal or anal fisting and one on safety, at the Express Milwaukee.
via sapphoria.tumblr.com
“I forget how we started fooling around, but I remember with incredible clarity the way her gloved fingers felt inside me. She fingered me hard, and it felt amazing, and I, of course, started begging for more. She slid another finger inside me, and asked if I wanted more. I indicated that I did, and I felt myself stretch as she pushed her thumb into me. There was a little pain, as her hand twisted inside me, trying to work its way all the way in, but it hurt far less than I expected […] I seriously hope I never forget her looking up at me and telling me that her whole hand was inside me. It was a moment of intense connection, her looking into my eyes and telling me I was, in fact, being fisted for the first time.” —Absynthe Cocktail
via deviantfemme.tumblr.com
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Am I the only lesbo not into the idea of fisting? Jesusmaryjoseph bhaggg
Interesting article, but I feel the same way you do. Yee-ouch!
Still, whatever BFGs your demons, I guess. ^_^
bfgs?
BFG is the most powerful weapon in the game Doom, and it is an acronym for “Big Freaking Gun.” And you can use it to blast demons! So, my comment was supposed to be a variation of “Whatever floats your boat.” I’ve been playing Doom 3 the past week ^_^
*raises hand shyly*
*blushes*
Careful where you raise that hand!! jk =P
Jeeez! If it was possible for me to blush a darker shade of red! LMAO!!! :x
The hand is really a powerful tool yes? Haha!
You’re definitely not the only one. I think everyone has a list of things they don’t like or won’t do for one reason or another and those things might change or they might not. I have a few things on my list of “don’t likes” that I find most everyone likes and things I love that a lot of people don’t like. Everyone is different physically, emotionally, etc. It’s all good. You do you :)
It’s not the pain thing(a little bit of that can be fun)…it’s just the idea of someone’s fist inside of me. It just sounds so unsexy. Thinking about it makes me feel queezy haha. I’m a big weirdo.
Totally not a weirdo. Promise :) I used to feel the same way about fisting, too. My tastes just changed. Everyone is different, grrl. That’s something to celebrate!
I feel the same exact way. Just imagining the scenario is a serious turn-off for me.
No, I don’t like any form of penetration so this just sounds like the worst for me. The only time I ever expect to stretch that much is when a baby’s head is exiting.
Definitely not, I don’t find the idea of a fist being inside me sexy at all. I didn’t even know that many people were into it until a friend bought me a book of lesbian erotica…
Amen! Besides, I am a big femme top in a relationship with a petite butch who’s just ceased being stone butch. Even if I didn’t have gigantic hands, she’d toss me out of the bedroom if I so much as mentioned it. :P
Don’t sprain your wrist while doing this, please.
Thank you for the AMAZING diagram! I love it!
This one time I was fisting my girlfriend…
Oh A-Camp. :D
You’re welcome :)
I am super into that infographic!
And the fact that this is a Day, which I had entirely forgotten about until I saw this post!
The infographic is tops.
This day is my birthday. Now if someone wants to know how to remember my birthday, I can just say ‘easy, it’s international fisting day’. Result.
vergüenza. good name for a band.
adding to my vocab
were you guys even ready for this infographic. i know i wasn’t.
NOPE!
Doesn’t mean it’s not one of the best ones ever, though!
That infographic is fantastic. Thanks for helping take some of the fear out of fisting!
Being a smut writer, I have explored fisting in my stories. But never have I wanted to try it as much as I do now. Damn.
I’m still unsure how I feel about fisting, but I’m glad to have this information for the future!
Ali, you are the Queen of Sex-Info. That graph was so good!
Also also also, anything Gabby writes is fantastic, so there’s that. I’m just wondering why Ali never wrote about her first time fisting…HMMMM.
you are by far the sweetest. always. all of the hearts. thank you.
Ahem, may I direct your attention to:
http://madeofwords.com/2012/09/23/that-fisting-story-comes-back-the-a-camp-sex-panel/
and the original, written version:
http://toywithme.com/stories/so-i-was-fisting-my-girlfriend/
GABBY, holy shit – way to take an act I’m not all that keen on and turn it into a really hot/well-written mini-essay.
I’m a big fan of the phrase “Olympic Level Penetration.” Seems like the proverb of a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step makes sense here. :)
Let me tell you something about fisting… It’s awesome.
I can only agree. It took me a while to get to it, but I’m never going back.
(this!)
Gabby, I was listening to this song while reading your story and cried a little bit, it was so beautiful.
Thank you for that.
she’s not exaggerating, i can confirm this happened!
then i read it and got equally emotional.
that is super intense fisting music.
I was fantasizing about fisting (as a giver, and to a girl) before I even realized I was bi. But back then I buried that deep inside my mind because I found it so shocking – and damn I still’ve watched no porn about it!
Slowly unearthing stuff…
Did this with my gf last year, it was pretty special (I received), ended up a bit teary afterwards because it was so intense. It’s an amazing to feel.so connected to someone. We’ve done it once since, for usit one for special occasions.
Did anybody else text a cute girl and tell her it was International Fisting Day? Anybody? Just me?
OMG I totally just texted the cutest girl ever and told her that we missed International Fisting Day!
:)
Wait…I never got that text.?.?
I must of sent it to your old number (bah-zinga!)
In the words of PSY…
Heyyy sexy lady!
http://gangnamstyle.co.cc/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/tumblr_m7qrx2jahw1qmyz5no2_500.gif
And there were no fucks given that day.
No.
Oh God, no.
Literally never.
I KNOW, RIGHT?
I just really, really love Sundays.
I’m glad we’re good enough friends that I don’t have to worry about revealing too much about my personal life and scarring you via the interwebz.
Haha, what even is TMI anymore? <3
gabby’s story was soo sweet aww. thank you
also
http://thesexpositivephotoproject.blogspot.com/2011/10/international-fisting-day.html?zx=de6fa24a80ce9357
jiz lee you guys
I legitimately teared up at the last line in Gabby’s story. Only on Autostraddle would a story about fisting make me cry big, blubbery, happy tears.
Now we need an infographic that details the levels of penetration with fisting at the top since it’s olympic level (possibly with gold/silver/bronze medals for various fisting techniques)
Love, love this idea. This could get really intricate. I wish I had Photoshop or Illustrator on hand!
Fisting is so wonderful. I have been the receiver and unfortunately my girlfriend is unable to take it. She is great at giving it though. We have a wonderful connection and we trust each other immensely. It’s awesome! I’m so glad I found this post.
Does anybody know if its safe to fist a post-op trans woman?
http://www.the519.org/My%20Files/Trans%20Resources/Sex%20Work/1510_519_transwomen.pdf
Page 17. Basically, no. Sorry.
Bummerrrrr.
I’ll just cross that little fantasy out slowly and with a heavy sigh…
This article is so beautiful. It gives me hope that one day I’ll be able to enjoy (female) penetration.
Never been on the receiving end, but fisting’s pretty fun to top imho.
Can’t believe how turned on I got from reading Gabby’s story… Kudos!
yay. hi5. get it.
Wow well all I can say is another good idea to change the columbus day holiday
This is my first “Autostraddle is being psychic” moment. I knew fisting day was some time around nowish, but the actual timing of this could not have been more perfect. My girlfriend and I are no where near ready for Olympic sex acts, but we are training pretty diligently. That infograph is everything I needed/wanted it to be.
And Gabby….sweet baby lesbian jesus.
Fisting is The Best.
That infographic is The Best.
Autostraddle is The Best.
The End.
I think this would work well as a promotional poster for International Fisting Day, given a few minor adjustments:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/4/40/TOGETHER_WE_CAN_DO_IT_-_KEEP_%60EM_FIRING_-_NARA_-_515856.jpg/170px-TOGETHER_WE_CAN_DO_IT_-_KEEP_%60EM_FIRING_-_NARA_-_515856.jpg
although the feeling doesn’t really match at all, I still think that the only possible soundtrack to this is Florence + The Machine . . . ‘A Kiss with a Fist’ anyone?
I’ve never ..erm… completed the act of fisting (as receiver) but I’ve gotten rather close with my ex.
I have to say I rather enjoyed it… and probably would have if we hadn’t broken up before getting the chance.
I’m so turned on
Fisting my girlfriend must be like the sexiest thing I’ve ever done. Never even thought of it before, but this one time when we were having sex while stoned I just noticed that four fingers weren’t enough thus she was craving for more and I carefully tried inserting my thumb, she started moaning like hell and I asked her if it hurt but she just sobbed “NO”, and yeah so I put my whole fist inside her. It was insanely sexy, not kidding, I was so horny at the moment, she was so beautiful and so wet (we didnt use any lubes). This was just this one time, guess it was easier when we were high back then, easier to relax and stuff. But I’d love to do it again someday. I’m not sure if she could do that to me just like that, I’m a lot more tighter than she is, but I’d like to try.
I am an Indian, 44. Started anal stretching since Nov.’13 and by Feb’143 I was able to get fisted. I started with various household objects and used coconut oil. Initially my circumference was only 6″ but by 2 months it grew into 7.5″. When I try slightly bigger object, it was pain mixed with extreme pleasure. I I always play with both nipples at the same time. After few days that object gets easy for me. That way by now I am able to insert wooden dildo of circumference 9″! So I guess, with silicon dildos(not available, all sex toys banned here) I can go upto 9.5″!
When I feel like, I start with some favourite porn, relax my hole….use oil, directly insert smaller(8.5″). After some play, I swithc to 9″ but that takes 30 min to succeed. Immediately the pressure causes 1/2 a spoonful of sperm to ooze out which I always swallow. The vigorous dildo fucking makes the rest of the sperm to ooze out & I passionately drink it completely.
My goal is to get double fisted someday with a suitable horny partner!
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