When Lesbians Attack! Stuffed Wolf Stolen From Dinah Shore Party Has Been Returned

This weekend at Girlbar‘s White Party, Samantha Ronson DJ’ed followed by a performance by Kelis, who you know as the lady that sang Milkshake. Kelis inexplicably required a stuffed wolf on display during her performance. Here’s a wide shot of the stuffed wolf howling while Samantha Ronson DJ’ed:

Here’s our friend, Courtney Jackson, who found herself in pre-show proximity to the wolf. Courtney did what any woman would do in this kind of situation — PHOTOSHOOT!

Following Kelis’s performance, things did not go exactly according to plan. From My Desert Dot Com:

Palm Springs police are asking residents for help in tracking down a stolen stuffed wolf.

The wolf — which police said was worth more than $10,000 — went missing after a Friday night musical performance at Hotel Zoso, 150 S. Indian Canyon Drive.

“It was stuffed by a taxidermist (and) it was one of several props that were on stage during a concert,” said Officer Melissa Desmarais, a Palm Springs police spokeswoman. “When the performance was done, they noticed that this one was missing.”

Hotel Zoso played host to Girl Bar Dinah Shore Week’s Pure White party Friday night, which included performances by DJ Samantha Ronson and R&B singer Kelis.

Phil Lobel, publicist for the Girl Bar event, said two stuffed wolves, posed in a howling position, were on stage for Kelis’ performance, which began around 1 a.m.

Clearly when we heard of this we were really disappointed that we hadn’t thought to steal the wolf, although Riese has a lot of feelings about dead animals and likely would’ve thrown up on the whole situation, just like the Paradiso Girls wanted. Whomever did steal the wolf eventually got scared of getting caught, and dropped the wolf off at the k9 Country Club, therefore restoring peace in Dinah Shore.

The End! Oh also, here’s a reminder for you of how Kelis feels about PETA.

A contract between the gay community and our straight neighbors: “Growing up gay can be a very isolating experience, where one is always worried about his safety or her being found out at any moment. To find a place full of people like you with a sense of history and community is a great thing. After all, the only thing that unites many gay men and lesbians is the place where they live.” (@gawker)

Martina Navratilova, the tennis star using a lack of gay marriage laws to get a favorable divorce from her ex, talks to Larry King about having breast cancer. She has an “aggressive form of ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS), considered the earliest form of breast cancer.” She says she has a “great chance” of making a full recovery. (@advocate)

“A study of 2,500 gay and bisexual men claims that almost three-quarters of them would refuse an advance in medicine that could change their sexuality to heterosexual. … Whilst 26% of those surveyed admitted that they would take a ‘straight pill’, if such existed, almost three times as many men (74%) had no desire to alter their sexual preference.” The survey was conducted by ManCentral.com, a dating website and probably a decent place to find guys who really, really like being gay. (@pinkpill)

The Advocate’s annual 40 Under 40 has been released, and some of our faves made the cut: Shannon Wentworth (Sweet), comedian Gloria Bigelow (CherryBomb), and Jillian Michaels. It’s nice to see Jillian has evolved from coming out bi in Ladies’ Home Journal to clarifying some confusion about her girlfriend to being honored in The Advocate. (@advocate)

A new California case concerns the point at which permissible teenage taunts become actionable threats, when Internet goofs by schoolkids became places for judicial intervention. The primary question for the California courts was whether R.R.’s comments were “true threats,” falling outside the ambit of the First Amendment, or instead were harmless bits of immature jocularity, protected as free speech.

That’s probably the right call. For one thing, a threatening homophobic comment really isn’t any less threatening because it appears amongst inane homophobic comments. And though no one wants a censored Internet, surely we can live with a rule that allows us to deploy the full range of vulgarisms short of calling for someone’s violent death. Homophobes can be First Amendment champions; the guardians of free speech are often odious. But the online equivalent of tossing a burning cross on someone’s lawn is not exactly the type of speech that implicates core First Amendment values.


Jon Stewart, muppets, lesbian bondage fiascos, and stupid Republicans. What else could we ask for? “The lesbian bondage fiasco. If that is not the name of a new indie band by tomorrow, I will be disappointed.”

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Mon – Thurs 11p / 10c
Michael Steele Plays the Race Card
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Tea Party

An interesting account of a woman going to a business seminar: “Men are like waffles, women are like spaghetti”: My day at a business seminar for women:

“I’d been holding out hope that the seminar would acknowledge the particular challenges that women face dealing with institutionalized gender discrimination in the workplace, empowering us with strategies to address issues that hamper our success. If they were truly acknowledging the particular challenges that women face thanks to structural inequality (the glass ceiling, unequal pay, harassment, etc.) that’d be one thing. But this was not that – and without that foundation, the gender-specific approach merely segregates and reinforces tired stereotypes.”


Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!


Riese is the 41-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3228 articles for us.


  1. Ha, how did they sneak an entire wolf out of the place where the concert was on, it’s not like stealing a sign you can hide in your jacket! (not that we’d be doing that ever,what!)

    Also, if such a straight pill existed, no way would I take it, I love being gay, so much more fun then being hetero, and I dont imagine im in the minority when I say that?!

  2. why did we not steal the wolf? really? i mean granted i was lost in the desert/at ke$ha or something


    Lesbian Bondage Fiasco > Angela & The Chase ???

    lots of math in this comment. lots of math.

  4. I am with Lou- I maybe would’ve been tempted when first coming out/freaking out, but now I wouldn’t dream of taking the pill. Some things would be easier, but I love being gay, gay things and the diversity it brings to the world to have gays. But to be fair, I haven’t had it as hard as probably 25% or more of gays have.

    Also, I hate pills. I’m so glad I don’t need birth control. That’s like lesbian side bonus #1 in my book.

    That wolf thing is hilarious, especially the photos. Too bad they didn’t get more creative about returning it like putting a silver dollar sign necklace on it and leaving it in front of the Hollywood sign.

    Also, I think it’s return probably brought peace rather than piece. ;)

    • That’s true, maybe the people here who wouldnt take the pill are just lucky and are able to live the gay life easily. Although when I first came out life wasnt quite so fun…but I still wouldnt have taken it, (if such a thing existed) who wants to be part of the dull and predictable majority when you can be a member of the fabulously diverse minority!

      Also, they so could have gotten way more milage from that wolf thing, and took photos of it all over the place and sent them to the Dinah Facebook page or something, would have been great! I’ll bet Samantha Ronson stole it-> she saw it during her dj set, liked the look of it and thought it’d look nice above her fire place, true story.

    • Even when I first came out, I don’t think I would have gone for a straight pill… but I am blessed with super-supportive parents and a stubborn streak a mile wide.

  5. That whole gay/straight pill thing makes me sad. Why would anyone want to change such a fundamental part of who they are? I feel so lucky to live where I do and have the support I have so that I don’t have to feel like that. For me, being a gay woman has never been a disadvantage. If anything, its just way more fun, like being a red head ;).. and that I get from a bottle, not a pill.

  6. Yeah i would not take the straight pill either. Unless everyone else did, and i was like the only gay person left. Then that would just suck.

    • i want to have a problem with how willingly you’d follow others into heterosexuality, but damn, you’re right. being the only gay girl would be BALLS. if the heteropocalypse ever happens, can you and i make a pact? let’s be the two hold outs, yeah? DEAL??

    • I remember watching this at 3am on Logo, maybe? I don’t think the acting was all the great, but I was pleasantly surprised overall given how low-budget it seemed.

      • Yeah, I definitely saw it on Logo at some ungodly hour. I used to watch Logo obsessively. Then, after I watched everything…there were just repeats. And more repeats. Over and over and over.

        • i really enjoyed the Real Momentum Documentaries. One night they magically showed an Undressed marathon and I just about died.

  7. Also in gay neighborhoods its never really a lesbian neighborhood its always men. Do lesbian areas actually exist?

    • It’s not a neighborhood, but Northampton, MA is nicknamed “lesbianville” – that’s pretty neighborhood-y. I’ve never been.

      • i lived there last summer and while it’s pretty common to see gay girls walking around town, there’s a shocking lack of community. no lgbt center, for example, and the only gay bar in town is definitely male-dominated :/

        can autostraddle discuss why there’s all the “lgbt” resources/businesses/media/etc are really all about gay men? why are there only 2.5 lesbian specific bars in all of new york city ? these things confuse me. a lot.

        • Can someone explain to me why when I saw my first pride parade, at the Out Games in Montreal four years ago, 98% of the people marching were gay men?

          Are lesbians to blame? Is it that we’re just not getting involved, or are we being intentionally excluded?

          So off topic.

          • this topic is very relevant to my/our interests!

            it could be that lesbians just have less money to spend and can’t buy or donate or otherwise support lesbian organizations… since women still make 75 cents on every dollar a man makes, aren’t well-represented as ceos, etc.

            but even when i was going to the lgbt center in nyc last year, to a -free- social group targeted at 20-somethings, i was often almost the only girl around. do we just not want to socialize with other lesbians? are we all antisocial cat ladies by the age of 20?

          • I think the same thing can be said about lesbians all over the world from what I can tell. Apparently Dublin has the highest number of gay people per capita in the world (I know that’s hard to believe!) and the vast majority of nights are gay male dominated. There are a huge amount of lesbians here and i’ll see a load of them tonight at the lesbian night and occasionaly at a certain bar but for the rest of the month they seem to go into hibernation. Perhaps lesbians in general are just less likely to go out on the gay scene than gay men maybe, that seems to be the case here. Also, when lesbians pair off they seem to disappear off the face of the earth into their own little world which wrecks my head, perhaps it’s a combination of those two things amongst others of course!

          • i was at that parade! and you know something, i think it was my first pride parade too :)

            i agree with what’s already been said here; women tend to have less disposable income, and the “lesbian scene” isn’t as heavily based on clubbing and bathhouses and manhunt-type dating sites. i’ve lived in two gay-friendly cities as a gay adult woman – Montreal and now New York – and in both cities the lesbian scene is more underground. we can’t seem to keep a club open to save our lives. and gay girls don’t go out! we go out what, one night per weekend, maybe? usually it’s a special event or a roller derby or an anarchist cabaret or some other bullshit that gets the women out of their cat-infested lovenests for a night. and i don’t think it’s because we’re lazy or antisocial (well i’m sure that’s part of it) i think it’s because we’re PRACTICAL.

          • ALSO our neighbourhoods are segregated. again, i only know Montreal and New York, but in both cities the “gay village” is totally male-dominated, and the lesbians congregate quietly elsewhere (Chelsea vs. Park Slope / Village vs. Mile End/Plateau). and i’m not sure it’s intentional; i think it comes down to wanting to live in a cute neighbourhood with cheaper rent and more lesbians.

          • “i don’t think it’s because we’re lazy or antisocial (well i’m sure that’s part of it) i think it’s because we’re PRACTICAL.”

            What exactly do you mean by practical?

            I ask because I think it’s a very interesting perspective. Especially because lazy and/or antisocial, depending on the situation, is exactly what I consider myself to be, but I would much rather eventually tell myself/other people that I’m practical!

          • i just meant like, we’re practical in the sense that we like to save money and get enough sleep ;)

        • If you guys are genuinely interested in this topic, Brooke and I could probably write 4,000 words on it. There might be little else in the world we know more about than this topic at this point.

          Also though; West Hollywood is fairly lez, as are areas of San Fransisco.

    • From what I could tell Brighton in the UK seemed to be like some sort of lesbian mecca. In fairness I was there during pride but even so the amount of lesbians was astounding, way more gay women than gay men for some reason. I think it’s where lots of lesbians go to retire from the scene, thus creating a brand new scene there! Oh, and I hear there’s a massive gay and lesbian area in Sydney where all the businesses are gay and lesbian run which sounds great! And isnt there some big mad area in L.A where all the lesbos hang out…so a mate tells me anyway.

  8. I’m confident they’ll never make a pill that can change social constructs… I think

    • FeminismRx! take one paradigm-shifting theory every 3-5 days, reflect, and act. if symptoms of frustration persist, consult fellow feminists.

  9. If I was straight, I’d take a gay pill. Make that three or four…or ten, I’d want to be SUPERgay. I’d OD on gay pills.

  10. I am consistently awed by the default gravatars. So far though, I think I liked T.Swift best.

    Never change, Autostraddle. Never ever change.

    • I vote that for the next one we leave the tween and wanna seem like a tween (looking at you, T-Swift) world and have Christopher Walken avatars. The Miley ones are cracking me up though because like every other pic I see of her and Bieber they are throwing the peace sign.

Comments are closed.