Gift Guide: For the Soft Butch Who’s Hard to Shop For

HOLIGAYS 2017 / Autostraddle

Click here for Holigays 2017

It’s tough to be soft in this hard world.

As the holigays get into full swing, it’s a good time to remember the soft butches of your life, these masculine-of-center, queer gems who help make the LGBTQ crown shine and also keep it functioning and also like to pick it up and put it back down if you need any help moving. *subtle flexing*

Soft butches are called by various names – chapstick lesbians, tomboys – but this holigay season, call them your appreciated sweetie/friend/bro/buddy/pal with these gift ideas and let them know their softness is loved!

Yeoman Vest ($105-$115)

A vest is one of the most versatile clothing options in a soft butch’s closet. This one has THREE pockets, which is amazing, along with a lining. A vest is a simple, clean, and easy way to snazz up the jeans and button down that soft butch you know is already wearing.

Imaginary Authors Fragrances ($38)

Finding one’s signature scent is a lifetime journey, but these unisex fragrances from Imaginary Authors are a good way to start. And with names like “Slow Explosions” and “Memoirs of a Trespasser” and “Every Storm a Serenade,” you’re already crushing it.

Wood Retro Watch ($31)

Made of bamboo, this watch is perfect for that soft butch who likes minimalism and telling time and some of that analog life.

Tomboi Fabric Brief Harness ($89.95)

This isn’t to say all soft butches are tops, but these briefs are a wearable, comfortable option for those who are (and those who like to top their soft butches, heeeeey!). Wear them under your pants and always be prepared.

Kershaw Shuffle II ($18)

A good pocket knife can be so handy for all walks of life, and this sharp little number is slim, inconspicuous, has a flathead screwdriver tip (what, sometimes a soft butch needs to screw) and a bottle opener (always useful).

Vans SK8-HI MTE ($90)

These are a riff on the classic Vans hi-tops but with extras to ward off the elements – leather uppers keep the rain out, the lining is warm, and they have actual traction on the outsole. “Look good and cool while going anywhere” should be the soft butch motto, probably.

Soft Butch Tee ($26)

Why make them guess based on your excellent hair and disposition?

Garnier Surfer Hair Power Putty ($12)

Help that soft butch set their wild locks free with hair putty that says you’re going to look like a surfer (windblown, I suppose?) while using it but honestly it just does a really nice job of holding up during the day and letting you have control over your hair. (I mean, if that’s also the job of surfers, I apologize for not knowing.)

Smash the Patriarchy Necklace ($44)

OK, you really get two for the price of one from Bang-Up Betty, soft butches. Not only do you get the reminder to smash the patriarchy (so say we all), but you also get to wear a hammer! (And if this is your only interaction with a hammer, smash those stereotypes that a butch must know how to fix or build things!)

Vintage Poster Prints ($18)

Find your soft butch buddy/sweetie/pal a lovely vintage poster print for the wall and be rewarded with a gorgeous piece of art and a thankful soft butch. Also, who doesn’t love volcanoes?!

Thinking of buying gifts from the Autostraddle Store?

To get your deliveries in time for the holidays make sure to place your order by

Dec 13th—UPS First Class*
Dec 15th—USPS Priority Mail/UPS Ground*

*These dates are for domestic orders–we have no guarantee for international orders, so get ‘em in early heartstrings! ♡


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Molly Priddy

Molly Priddy is a writer and editor in Northwest Montana. Follow her on Twitter: @mollypriddy

Molly has written 50 articles for us.


  1. Hello! We’ve switched out the aforementioned print, because Mika was correct and I missed that before putting it online! Please, instead, enjoy the volcano.

    • if all things were so easy:

      mmmm that president is extremely racist

      Hello! We’ve switched out the aforementioned leader, because you were correct and we missed that before putting it in the white house! Please, instead, enjoy a functional congress

  2. i want to buy every single one of these items for the soft butch-ish human in my life. thanks for making xmas shopping for my gf that much easier, molly <3

  3. OOH that necklace is perfect. This is my problem with gift guides, I just want to buy stuff for myself!

  4. Great ideas, I really love the necklace!

    Any chance we’ll be getting an European Holigay gift guide this year? Because shipping from the US is really expensive and I hate shopping because people…

  5. Whoops I just bought myself the vans, taking away this gift idea for anyone who wanted to get it for me.

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