I went to a vocational high school and I learned how to write a resumé at 14. My first internship opportunity came along when I was 17, in 2007. It was my first job. I’m graduating in May with about five bucketfuls of experience that I got by losing sleep, running around, crying at bus stops, and finding a dogsitter. Yet I can’t help but feel wholly and completely fucked.
Applying for jobs means a new life full of “sincerely” and “best.” Your inbox will be consumed with one-sentence auto-reply emails in exchange for things you spent hours writing, like cover letters about why a part-time job in a retail store back office suits you now that you have your MA in Philosophy. The job market sucks, especially for young people, and I’d like to believe that only at this stage in my life will I so happily fight for a chance to have a large responsibility which sucks away all of the free time and ability to have fun in my life. I promised myself I’d never stop drunk tweeting, but here I am, putting together a website (shameless plug right here), updating my LinkedIn like some stiff in a full suit, and reformatting my 7-year-old resumé.
Did I sell out? What’s happening to me? Am I 30 yet? Will I ever have enough money to order more pizza? Where are my keys? I lost my phone.
I sucked it up and applied for my first job recently, which I would have congratulated myself for, except it’s March. I feel like I might be behind- some people I’m friends with on Facebook are already updating their statuses about how they “got the job in Italy!” – but I’m not worried because in the end, I recognize that one thing and one thing only helps you get the job: more Drake.
When you’re applying to jobs, all you need is some background noise to remind you that you’re pretty much the shit. I want you to shoot for the stars, my fellow straddlers, and that means giving you this playlist so you’ll never forget how lucky the person on the other end of firstname.lastname@example.org is just from hearing from you.
PS – Buy a blazer.
Get A F*cking Job: The Playlist
[Stream the playlist here]
Dedicated to Brittani Nichols,
who also loves Drake
+ I Can – Nas
+ Bills Bills Bills – Glee Cast
+ Gotta Work – Amerie
+ Independent Women – Destiny’s Child
+ The Good Life – Kanye West
+ Headlines – Drake
+ I’m The Best – Nicki Minaj
+ Juicy – Notorious B.I.G.
+ Billionaire – Travie McCoy & Bruno Mars
+ Bill Gates – Lil Wayne
+ Illest Motherfucker Alive – Kanye West & Jay-Z
+ Broke But Not Broken – Xtra Medium
+ New Work – jj
Want to suggest a playlist theme? Hit Crystal up on Formspring and someone on the team might make it for you.