Hey there, sparkly disco balls! Welcome to the first Friday Open Thread of the Brand Spankin’ New Year. A place to nurse your lingering hangover. Or share your tall tales of New Year’s Eve debauchery. Or share adorbable pictures of your cat photoshopped with cone hats and noisemakers and confetti.
How was your New Year’s? Did you party ’til the break of dawn? Share a kiss with your sweetie or a sexy stranger? Ring in 2015 on your couch in your jammies? Watch the Dick Clark (Ryan Seacrest?) show while devouring a whole pint of vegan ice cream?
Whatever went down at the stroke of midnight, it is 2015 now, whether we like it or not! Some people make resolutions this time of year, like: “I’m going to stop kissing sexy strangers at midnight.” Or: “I’m going to kiss more sexy stranger at midnight.” Or: “I’m going to run a triathlon.” Or: “I’m finally going to ask that cute barista for her number instead of just staring at her like a weirdo.” That kind of stuff. (You can read about our resolutions here.)
Some of us are less into resolutions because we are already perfect.
But that’s not what I’m here for. I mean, tell me your resolutions, yes, but what I want, what I really really want, is to know your baaaaaaaad habits. Tell me your bad habits, the ones you wish you could quit and the ones you never want to. The embarrassing habits, the neurotic habits, the things your loved ones tease you for (Like leaving my shedded hair in the shower drain, which drives my spouse up the wall). Bring it to the confessional of the world wide web and we will hold you, share our badness together. Because we’re not here to judge. You. Do. You.
My definite worst habit is biting my nails and cuticles. It is the grossest thing about me.
I have been a nail-muncher since I was four years old and my parents tried everything to get me to stop. They used that bitter nail polish stuff, bribed me with cash money, and convinced me I was incapable of digesting nails and I was creating this huge pile of nail bits in my stomach that would live forever until I asploded and died. At almost 32 (my birthday is on Jan 6th), I still chomp my nails. In the car, watching TV, during work meetings. I bite them until they bleed, sometimes. It’s a habit, a compulsion. I don’t know how to quit. Oh gawd, it’s so gross and so embarrassing.
I’m so jealous of people with healthy nails. I try to pass mine off as super-short “good lesbian nails,” but really I am just a gross nailbiter.
I recently got a gel manicure, determined to quit biting. The nail technician was so kind about my tiny jagged little nails. She was so positive that I could do this. She believed in me. I was doing great for about two weeks, until the gel manicure started peeling. It went rapidly downhill from there. I was too ashamed to go back for my next appointment. I felt like I failed my nail tech. Sorry, Nicole.
So here I am, reaching my stubby, nasty little fingers out to you, asking for your New Year’s honesty. What are your bad habits? Do you plan to break them in 2015? Are they a part of your resolutions? Have you just made peace with yourself that this is who you are?
Also, what are you looking forward to in 2015? Did you have a rad New Year’s Eve? Are you full of hope? Dread? Gas? Tell me everything, you beautiful disasters.
How To Post A Photo In The Comments:
1. Find a photo! This is the easy part. Find a photo on the web, right click (on a Mac, control+click), hit “Copy Image URL” and then…
2. Code it into your comment! Use the following code, and use a DIRECT LINK to the image. Your image link should end in .JPG or .GIF or .PNG or .CallMeWhateverYouWant even. I don’t care, but it should be an image suffix! KINDA LIKE THIS:
How To Post A Video In The Comments, Too:
1. Find a video on YouTube or Vimeo or WHATEVER and click “embed.” Copy that code, but first make sure it’s for 640 px wide or less. If your player is too large, it will not display properly.
2. Copy the code and paste it directly into your comment.
3. Go forth and jam.