Ke$ha & The Paradiso Girls Will Play Dinah Shore While You Drink Your Face Off

DINAH SHORE: Celebrating its 20th milestone anniversary (March 31- April 4, 2010), Club Skirts The Dinah will deliver the #1 Billboard pop artist with the current # 1 hit in the country, TIK TOK TIK TOK TIK TOK it’s Ke$ha! Last year Autostraddle “live-blogged” Dinah Shore (Dinah Shore Weekend Live-Blogged by A;ex for Autostraddle: Lady GaGa, RockBand & Pool Parties!) and Alex got so close to Lady Gaga she could practically lick her bubble dress. This year we will have to lick Ke$ha’s watch or something. Oh what luck she is already holding her sexy fingers out towards us in drunken delight, so we will lick her fingers:

Also, THIS JUST IN:

In a recent interview with Out Magazine, Tik Tok singer Ke$ha chatted with the gay mag about her orientation and, surprise surprise, she likes boys and girls !

“I like people, I wouldn’t say I’m gay or straight,” said Ke$ha, adding that she doesn’t like “labeling anything” anyway.

From the press release:

“Mariah Hanson, the visionary master brain and envelope-pushing event producer behind The Dinah has secured another extraordinarily exceptional entertainment line-up for the 2010 Dinah Shore weekend held at the Hilton Hotel and The Hyatt Regency in Palm Springs, CA!”

Also playing will be LOLENE, who I already like — how can you dislike a lady named Lolene, who apparently has “snatched the #5 spot on the Billboard Dance Charts with her hit single ‘Sexy People’.” Who doesn’t love snatches? Everyone loves dancing and Lolene!

This year, if the Paradiso Girls have their way, we will be “so messed up that we will be drunk & throwing up,” but you know what girls you gotta watch yourself and don’t get too vulnerable. We had the pleasure of interviewing the Paradiso Girls at the NewNowNext Awards. It was an unforgettable interview for so many reasons and ever since we have incorporated Aria’s description of a fun night out on the town into our lexicon. It involves “having fun like party time” and being “high on life.”

The Paradiso Girls Love Patron Tequila, Will Get Alex Drunk & Throwing Up

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Even if you hypothetically think that the lyrics of Petrone Tequila are offensive to women, you will still agree that these ladies are very, very very good looking, AM I RIGHT LADIES?

Oh and this is Lolene, she is going to lick her lips and then your lips:

CONTACT GAY: Kristen Bell told the media she was 99 percent sure she’d turn gay during shooting her new movie Burlesque with Cher and Christina Aguilera. Or, in the words of “Showbiz Spy” — “Kristen Bell FEARED the movie would turn her gay.” I read no fear into these words, you are probs projecting. Anyhow, I think getting sexual energy from Cher and Christina Aguilera probs means you’re a gay man, not a lesbian, but anyway here’s the quote:

“I have never felt so much good female energy around me,” she said. “I find that I can’t take my eyes off them. I’m 99 percent sure I will leave this movie a lesbian.”

That’s how I felt when I imagined being cast in The L Word because I was marveling at how Erin Daniels & Jennifer Beals could remain straight while making out with hot girls and then I realized it was because they actually were straight and maybe I wasn’t. Anyhoo. (@showbizspy)

CLOSETING: Rosie O’Donnell and Tracy Kachtick-Anders are not in the closet, but is a “glass closet” better? – “Some celebrity couples like Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi have been able to be out of the closet and still maintain thriving careers. For other homosexuals, however, there have been problems.”

GAGLAMBERT: Lady Gaga defends Adam Lambert against homophobes. What a fantastic superhuman feat, it deserves a headline. One day I want to live in a world where the army has to have bake sales to buy tanks and people only make headlines for not defending their friends against homophobes. (@showbizspy)

TRUE BLOOD: “As I first teased in Ask Ausiello, True Blood has been quietly searching for a hot thirtysomething Latino actor to play a love interest for Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) during the drama’s upcoming third season. Well, the search is over! According to The Hollywood Reporter, the recurring role has gone to Southland’s Kevin Alejandro.” (@ew)

KERLI: Firstly, her status AND her mood update? This shit is serious: “It’s kinda f*cking funny that Lady Gaga ALSO has yellow hair now,” a yellow-haired Kerli said in her status and mood update. “I wish she would f*cking stop ripping off everything I do. F*cking b*tch.” (@neon limelight)

Riese is the 37-year-old CEO, CFO and Editor-in-Chief of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, blogger, fictionist, copywriter, video-maker, low-key Jewish power lesbian and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and then headed West. Her work has appeared in nine books including "The Bigger the Better The Tighter The Sweater: 21 Funny Women on Beauty, Body Image & Other Hazards Of Being Female," magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 2816 articles for us.

17 Comments

  1. omg holy crap Lady Gaga def took Kerli’s style, I remember when she first came out my ex and i lovedddddd her and then a few i guess months later Gaga came out omg its sooo true, i didn’t even think about it but its true, … but Gaga is a man so does it still count?

    Rihanna stole Fefe Dobson’s and Kelis complete look

    so many artist steal styles and looks and the one that sells the least records we forget about…and the thief always seems to be original smh like that song by beyonce “if i was a boy” she stole it from that rock girl and got sued over it but had the press minimize it smh

    i have to say rosie odonel is the one lesbian i just have no interest in but the more the better lol.anyway goood read informative shyt!

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  3. A world where the army holds bake sales to buy tanks? Did you consider for a moment what an impossible moral dilemma that would be?! “Hm… I’m anti-wart, but OMG! Is that a chocolate HAZELNUT cupcake?! Buttercream frosting you say? I’ll take a dozen- your next rocket launcher is on me, soldier!”. I’d probably go ahead and buy the cupcakes, but I’d insist they only use my donation for buying hot uniforms and no actual weaponry.

  4. I like Kerli’s music, but I think posting about how some artist is ripping you off on your myspace or twitter or whatev’s is kind of tacky and just comes off as jealousy.

    Also, Roisin Murphy, who I also love has also claimed on her twitter that Gaga is ripping her off..

    Really ladies? Really? Do you think you’re doing anything to benefit your careers by bad talking other artists? Also, come on – she has the same hair colour as me? So high school.

  5. Okay, really? That homophobe is absolutely ridic. Who, while in a club, getting their drink on and dancing, spots Lady Gaga and thinks, “wait, I saw her with Adam Lambert. Instead of being cool and dancing alongside her, I’m going to make an ass out of myself and tell a celebrity off about hanging with another celebrity”? How is that your first thought?

    Ehh, whatevs. I’m just glad that Lady Gaga told him off proper.

  6. Dear Kerli, I have literally never heard of you, and I wouldn’t bet that Lady Gaga has either. So I think you are probably safe from being ripped off! You can sleep tight, and take off that yellow wig, it kind of looks weird!

  7. wonders if having one hit song is worthy of an “Ultimate Premiere Online Fan Source!” wonders why she’s writing like she’s on twitter. wonders why the vending machine STOLE MY GODDAMN REESE’S CUP

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  9. Who is this Kerli girl? Why is she talking about Gaga ripping her off? It’s kind of like getting pissed at God for ripping off your style upon hearing that he created you in his own image. Or something.

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