Real L Word Picked Up for Season Three, Ilene Chaiken Still Hates Us

In fear-affirming, almost incomprehensible news, Showtime has renewed The Real L Word for a THIRD SEASON! Season Three, you guys. There will be a Season Three.

Ilene Chaiken, the show’s creator and archenemy to all things honest and positive, tries to justify her/its persistent existence on your teevee screen in this way:

“[…] we think it’s time to throw down and invite the women of New York to join in and demonstrate the claims they’ve lobbed at us these past few years — that New York’s women have something more to say about lesbian life, something that isn’t being said by our Los Angeles ladies.”

She also adds a bell-ringing, “Bring it on, Brooklyn!” just for good measure.

The show will “revolve around new East Coast cast members” but will include Los Angeles “fan favorites” like Whitney! Special guest stars are also anticipated, which means someone on that team must be a genie, predicting what will naturally unfold this year while cameras happen to be around.

It’s not really fair to challenge NYC lesbiqueers to have something more to say about lesbian life than the LA ladies did, considering the LA ladies probably had a shit ton of things to say about lesbian life, it just all landed neatly on the cutting room floor. So anyway, we’re super excited to see how Chaiken & Co. will manipulate the activities and mannerisms of a new group of young women in order to appeal to the lowest common denominator/men. They’ve clearly got this down to a science!

How do you feel about this news? If you’re in NYC, do you want to be a part of the madness? DOES THIS SHIT EVER END.

Photography © jmberman1 2009

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L

L has written 310 articles for us.

93 Comments

  1. Oh. Dear. Lord. We have been holding out covering this ridic show on our website for 2 yrs now…We may have to actually give in now and cover this crap…SHIIIIT!

  2. I’m telling ya, it’s all an excuse to use Romi’s rap as the new theme song.

    If they want a New York angle, why not GO TO NYC and set this season there, rather than get 3 or 4 of them to come to LA?

  3. This is really bizarre to me. Im in Canada and all my circle of lesfriends were MAD into The L Word when it was airing. I’ve never seen this show you are writing about and not one of my friends or acquaintances in the les world have ever mentioned this show. Perhaps Eileen should do a real L Word but with Canadian dykes. Maybe once the rest of the les world sees the rights and freedoms we have here it will inspire even more political activity to force your govts to give you the same freedoms and rights as the average Canadian human being. Just a thought. Hugs to all chicks!

    • Yes!why isn’t IFC thinking of her well-being?

      also I would have expected these important news to be reported by riese (her being the one tilting at windmills and all) but she is probs already drunk.

      I’m just glad that the chance of this show making its way over the ocean to my TV is pretty slim.

      • haha i made laneia write it so i could finish writing about occupy oakland and glee, neither of which i’ve yet to complete! i did pick out the photographs, however, and write one of the paragraphs. It’s a shorter paragraph. We’re really close, Laneia and I.

        Actually last year when it was announced I was out, and I was like, how fast can you guys get a post together — to Sarah and Laneia — and I made them do it. So this year I thought it would be a fun throwback. Except then I remembered that nobody is paying that much attention! Nobody at all! Just me! Anyhow, this post made me LOL.

        I feel like someone said something about my mental state that i was gonna respond to

    • Yeah, maybe it can be a control year and we’ll see whether or not it gets renewed for a 4th season without Autostraddle making it happen.

  4. Actually can’t wait. Not for the show, but for the recaps. Riese recaps and associated drinking games. For the motherfucking win.

    • Not gonna lie, the real l word is kind of ridiculous, but I think Whitney is hot. Kind of ashamed of that. It’s the whole dread locks, facial piercings, tough guy attitude more than anything. As a person, not so much. But damm the dreads get me every time!

  5. It’s becoming evident that Ilene should be paying AS, not hating on it, because the only reason we all even tolerate this bullshit is because of Riese’s recaps. I don’t understand why IFC is so dumb. RIESE IS THE REASON YOU ARE STILL KICKING, ILENE. JESUS.

      • You’re amazing. I’m sitting in my room cooped up with a cold and now I have chicken soup on my laptop from giggling.

  6. I feel like this post (and the ensuing craptastic television that I will undoubtedly watch and which will later make my soul cry) pairs nicely with Rachel’s team pick for today, “In Defense of Cheap Wine”.

  7. I hope the subway rats chew on all the camera equipment and render the show un-produceable. Stay away from my city, Ilene.

    • There’s no hate button anymore, so just know that by liking your post I am hating everything with you.
      And also by writing it here.

  8. I have never watched this show, but I really enjoyed the adorable kitten licking the faucet. Now I must go out and find a stray kitten to bring home and love and cuddle with. That is all.

  9. Why? Is there a monopoly going on here? Is Ilene Chaiken the only person that can produce a show about lesbians?
    but YAY Recaps!

  10. I think the whole “this is the real new york” angle that will SURELY be a part of this will make it just that much more hilarious.

  11. This article was written by Laneia because Riese is too busy sticking her head in the oven.

    I just can’t.

  12. i was pretty sure when i clicked on this post that it was gonna be a prank/fake news kind of post. while it looks like it isn’t, i’m still gonna operate under that assumption. good one, autostraddle!

  13. I don’t think that Ilene Chaiken still hates us. It’s just that she’s a terrible writer/producer.
    Lest we forget the phenomenon of Jersey Shore? I’m just surprised that this show is actually profitable.

    • making reality tv shows is HELLA CHEAP. like ridiculous cheap. compared to “fiction” tv. i don’t know how it is for trlw, but most reality shows these days are paid so heavily by advertisers who do product placement in the shows that many networks don’t have to spend a dime to get reality shows made. i knew this would happen ’cause there’s really no reason for them to cancel it besides “caring about humanity,” and i mean, hello. they get to maintain like, 100,000 or so lesbian subscribers who didn’t cancel after TLW, a lot of website hits, and a fun late-night sex show (a la big brother after dark, also on showtime), and good brand extension opportunities with the cast. so ta-DA!

  14. I feel sorry that Riese will have to recap those for us. Really, I mean, you don’t have to do it. They make me laugh, but I care more about your mental health than my merriment.

  15. This show is crappola. It doesn’t represent us accurately, and it is a terrible model for young lesbians and bisexual women.

    • AGREED! My girlfriend’s immediate reaction to this, after a disgusted sigh, was “Wow…I wonder how bad they’ll make us look this season!?” pondering how this got picked up for another season, I decided it’s because the availability of free girl on girl action on tv for young men to beat off to is quite limited….must be a niché market. Fuck you and your fuckery, IFC!

      Riese’s decals are the only good thing about this!! Well, that and the reasons to drink ourselves stupid ;)

  16. I think there are better uses for whatever ungodly sum of money Ilene fuckin’ Chaiken is getting for the making of this nonsense. I think among those uses are:
    1) throwing the money down an abandoned mine shaft
    2) giving it to Kim Kardashian to fund another wedding
    3) handing all of that money to me so I can pay my bills and student loans, AND write a screenplay about actual, real lesbians (and bisexual and queer and trans* folks because they don’t exist in LA, maybe?) and probably piss off fewer people along the way.

  17. I was going to get my friend a subscription to a Whiskey of the Month Club as a gift for ChristmaHanuKwanzaaRohatsuYule, but I’m thinking I should send it to Riese instead.

    Weren’t the ratings on this show terrible? How is this shit still on the air, yet shows like Firefly (no, I’m still not over it) don’t even get a full season?

  18. I was away all summer and couldn’t watch Season 2…I recently tried to watch it On Demand, but it’s like, really really bad. So I didn’t finish it. That being said, I’m really excited for Season 3 only because we get more recaps Riese :)

  19. Season one, Fantastic, more than anything it was entertaining. Season 2 was such TV shit I couldn’t stand it, everyone was wayyyy too whiny. But nobody can say those steamy shower scenes and others were not fun to watch for both seasons ;D haha.
    I am looking forward for more of those.

  20. I have a straight coworker who watches this show (yeah..a guy..shocking!) and actually thinks this is a representation of my life outside of work..Can I sue IFC? I want to sue IFC..I realize it’s a frivolous suit but my only other option would be to beat her with one of the many empty wine bottles I’ve drained in this shows wake

    • Frivolous or not, I say go for it. Maybe we could get together and call it a class action suit against the defamation of our collective characters! I’m starting to wonder how the rest of New Jersey feels about the fuckery that MTV touts as reality in their world. ::cringe:: Now I feel really badfor lesbians in NJ…I’ve never been there, but I have a feeling they are double screwed!

      Gross.

      • Speaking as a NJ lesbian, I’ve often wondered what folks think we’re growing here in the Garden State besides a bounty of freaks

        • I can’t even imagine! Hopefully it’s a copious amount of pot to help you deal with the widely accepted defamation of your beautiful state!

    • I also like the show, but the lesbians can’t get over this Ilene hangup..

      I’ll continue to think for myself :-)

  21. OMG that kitten picture is awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ha ha

    I actually thought the real L word was hillarious in season 2. I think I just love train wreck TV… like a guilty pleasure. lol

  22. I have a conspiracy theory that maybe Ilene Fucking Chaiken the Satanlord is operating under the impression that since straight cisgender men rule this country by pandering to them she’s turning the queer community into something more socially acceptable which will somehow translate into something positive instead of the shitfest of misrepresentation it is.
    Fuck social acceptability.

  23. How in the heavenly hell of misguided lesbians is this show still on? Seriously, HOW?! I don’t get it, WHAT IS HAPPENING. I FULLY BELIEVE THIS IS A PROPAGANDA BY A MAGICAL STONED UNICORN RIDING CHEAP WINE DRINKING LESBIAN LEPRECHAUN WHO’S MAKING POTS OF GOLD OUT OF THIS SOUL CRUSHING ADDICTION INDUCING TRAIN WRECK OF A SHOW.

    *rocks back and forth in the corner*

  24. OH no, I don’t think us “lesbians” are this complicated, my god! Season Three better be realistic! Bring back lesbians with some sense, we need better representation.

    “THIS IS CRAZY.” – you are so right!

  25. IFC needs to go away. The Real L Word is just boring crap now. I know that crap sells these days. My goodness. Does balance ring a bell with Ilene?

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