Top Five Musical Theater Songs About Misandry

Man-hating songs have fallen out of style now, but back in the golden age of Broadway, they were a common comedy trope.

Two quick notes:

A) In order to make the final five, the song has to be an indictment of all men, not just one, although a number of those songs can be found in this playlist, which also includes a few “women are better than men” songs.

B) Some of the musicals on this list have some fucked up social commentary going on, particularly with regard to race. Calamity Jane is a good example. Kiss Me Kate is very misogynistic. These singular misandrist songs do not excuse that, but they are still enjoyably misandrist.

5. “One Hundred Easy Ways (To Lose A Man)” – Wonderful Town

Lyrical highlight: Just throw your knowledge in his face / He’ll never try for second base

4. “Forget About The Boy” – Thoroughly Modern Millie

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1GVVpzTNEpA

Lyrical highlight: And in the moonlight, don’t you think about him / Sister, you’re much better off without him / You can blow the blues a kiss goodbye / And put the sun back in the sky / For when he comes crawlin’ / I’m not fallin’

3a. “I’m Gonna Wash That Man Right Outta My Hair” – South Pacific

Lyrical highlight: If you laugh at different comics / If you root for different teams / Waste no time, weep no more / Show him what the door is for!

3b. “Many A New Day” – Oklahoma!

Lyrical highlight: Why should a woman who is healthy and strong,
blubber like a baby if her man goes away? / A-weepin’ and a-wailin’ how he done her wrong. / That’s one thing you’ll never hear me say!

I’m combining these into one number because I’m a cheater, but also these were written by the same guys! Rogers and Hammerstein!

2. “Men! (Horrible Men!)” – Calamity Jane

This doesn’t have a recording on Youtube, but you can listen to it here.

Lyrical highlight: Men men, horrible men / I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again / What I think of men you can’t print in a book / Lucky the girl who has never been took.

1. “I Hate Men” – Kiss Me Kate

Grace Ellis has been writing and making hack-job graphics for Autostraddle since 2011 and is a co-creator and co-writer of the comic book series Lumberjanes. She is mostly an intern in name only. (Mostly.) She lives in Columbus, Ohio because why anything. Also, she wants to write the Black Widow movie and feels like if she just keeps telling people, eventually she will be allowed to do it. She has a Twitter and a Tumblr, both of which are pretty above average.

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38 Comments

  1. Musical theatre and blaming the patriarchy, my favorite things.

    There is a YA novel/musical-in-writing called Castration Celebration, but I don’t recommend it, it’s the really bad kind of misanthropic/homophobic/transphobic, so don’t be tempted.

  2. After reading this post, I got stuck in my head an alternate version of the Annie Get Your Gun* song entitled “You Can’t Kill a Man with a Gun,” which is simply untrue.

    *Also, I almost typed that as Annie on my Mind. I’m a mess!

  3. This post brings back great memories of singing “I Hate Men” constantly during freshman year of college with my best-friend-roommate-straight-girl-crush. Excellent bonding experience, would recommend.

  4. Men and women spend so much time loving to hate each other and hating that they don’t understand each other. It’s almost as though it would be easier…and better…if they dated…each other…instead?

    (Sorry, still in my first year of being all out, where I somehow can’t believe that everyone isn’t at least a little queer, if they just meet the right person :-P)

  5. *slams fists on the table of the McDonalds patio where I’m currently…borrowing wifi on my break from work* NOW THIS IS THE TYPE OF CONTENT THIS MUSICAL THEATRE MAJOR LIKES TO SEE

    Shoutout to my homegirl, TONY AWARD WINNER JEANINE TESORI with Forget About the Boy.

    Also, I am…VERY attracted to Rachel York. One time, I saw the national tour of Anything Goes three times in a week because she is a SITUATION.

  6. You see, with the preposition ‘to,’ ‘who’ becomes the indirect object, making the use of ‘whom’ imperative which I can prove to you with this VERY SIMPLE CHART

    marry me

  7. i would just like to say that before i even read the article, that this title popped up on my newsfeed and i instantly thought: nOW THIS IS THE QUALITY CONTENT I AM IN NEED OF THANK YOU

  8. THIS LIST. YES.

    On another note, it isn’t about hating men but if you want some serious girl power feelings I would highly suggest So Much Better from Legally Blonde. I played Elle in high school (because my director cast the only lesbian as the world’s straightest character) and that song just made me want to jump and scream and be a woman. THAT IS ALL. I’m sorry for rambling. Okay bye.

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