Results for: be the change
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You Need Help: Your Straight Partner Is a Great Ally – But His Parents Aren’t
Setting up boundaries around family members can be a complicated and painful thing, but doing so without the support of your partner will likely be more difficult, and could potentially create some challenging situations for the two of you to navigate.
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Direct Communication Rules, Ghosting Sucks, Let’s All Say What We Mean
You may be wondering, do I really have to communicate directly about EVERYTHING? In short… yes! Well okay, in slightly longer: almost always yes.
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Love Is Not a Lie, It’s Science!
Love is pure. Love is real. But mostly, love is a bunch of neurotransmitters.
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#PolyamoryProblems: Opening Your Relationship 101
Welcome to the first installment of #PolyamoryProblems, a new advice column on Autostraddle. There are countless things I wish I had known before I started out, and lucky for you I’m here to tell you the things that will hopefully make your transition into polyamorous relationships much smoother.
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#PolyamoryProblems: How To Deal With Jealousy
This month, jealousy rears its pesky head for one polyamory veteran. Find out how to normalize jealousy, decode your feelings, and reframe jealousy as a gift to point you towards exploration and growth.
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You Need Help: Quarantine Smothered My Sex Drive
If you use this opportunity to sharpen your communication, your dynamic will be stronger (and hotter) on the other side of a crisis.
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You Need Help: Is It Normal To Be Happy In a Relationship and Still Think About an Ex?
Time won’t necessarily “fix” it, but the more distance you have from the relationship and the more time you invest in healthy coping mechanisms, the less destabilizing these thoughts will feel.
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You Need Help: My Partner’s Pandemic Practices Suck and I Want to Break Up
Transmitting a deadly virus doesn’t exactly say “I love you,” so it makes sense that this particular conflict is bringing up big questions about your relationship.
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Into the A+ Advice Box #23: What If Your Partner Didn’t Tell You They Were Potentially Exposed to Covid?
Your partner doesn’t want to talk about raising your kids to be anti-racist, longing to reach out to a former friend, and more!
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The Happiest Place On Earth
“I was guilty and heartbroken and I wasn’t ready to let go of her: my first kiss, my first time, my first girlfriend, my first love, my first everything and before that, my best friend.”
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Surprise, You’re In A Long Distance Relationship Now!
Here’s some advice about how to weather a long distance relationship during a global pandemic, whether you and your babe live in different countries or just a few blocks away.
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11 Books for Getting Started with Polyamory and Non-Monogamy
Search polyamory and you’ll see the term partnered with words like “sexual revolution” and “on the rise” in several news pieces on the subject. Surely, there’s more to non-monogamy than sex, or the rebellion of joining a fad? What could it take to make being open/ polyamorous/ non-monogamous work? Eleven books and the internet’s idea of a “sexual revolution” bookshelf later, I present to you a list of some major titles relevant to queer women.
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You Need Help: Trusting Yourself in a New Relationship After Early Attachment Trauma
Possibly your trauma history is being triggered out of context in this relationship – but maybe it’s not. YOU are the expert, no matter what your trauma history is.
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You Need Help: Why Am I So Tempted to Cheat?
Cheating is a form of escape from our current situation; it allows us to momentarily be with someone else, maybe even be someone else, for a night. Honesty has consequences. Cheating, if we don’t get caught, does not.
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Queer Sex Coven: A Relationship Format Tarot Spread
Pull a card to see which relationship format is right for you.
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You Need Help: What Does a Healthy Relationship Look Like?
What is it you are unlearning? What are the narratives about yourself that you are unraveling from your heart like so much tangled yarn? And can you be gentle through the unraveling?
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The Elusive Three-Way Relationship: How to Avoid F*cking It Up
A how-to guide to your first polyamorous adventure, from someone who made all the mistakes so you don’t have to.
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“I’m Not Missing Anything in My Relationship”: Bi Women and Nonbinary People on the Challenges and Joys of Dating
Bi people’s dating experiences are often complicated by biphobia and sometimes, a feeling of isolation from both queer and straight monosexual people.
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5 Unofficial Lesbian Relationship Milestones
Whereas we are conditioned to expect a First Date, followed by landmarks like Carefully Crafted First Instagram Post as a Couple and Attending Family Event in Neutral-Toned Sweater, a gay relationship may look more like Be Codependent Best Friends for Three Years Before Realizing You’re In Love Without Ever Going on a Date, followed by Emotionally Turbulent Road Trip to Visit Your Ex’s Rural Co-Op Together.
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Love Letters Across the Atlantic: How Distance Changes Your Relationship
“To date long distance then live with the other in person is to be in two versions of the same relationship. One wishes desperately for the future and is fueled by daydreams of the past; the other tries to make every waking moment something special and ignores the fact that time is passing, whether we like it or not.”