The history of lesbian closeting in Hollywood — and why, even today, so many lesbians prefer to stay in the closet. Also a Desperate Housewives lesbian storyline mini-cap, Tila Tequila’s Australian karaoke, an amazing Taylor Swift parody and Lindsay Lohan’s new interview.

Christina Aguilera is on the cover of OUT Magazine, assuring the gay men who read it that just like them, she likes dick but thinks girls are pretty (but crazy!!! omg! so cray crayyy). Also, Law & Order may be donzo, Vice does a power couples pictorial (EILEEN MYLES!!!!), Glee gets a new time slot, listen to GLEE doing Bad Romance (it’s pretty freakin’ awesome), Bianca Montgomery gets a facelift and Bitch explains why some stuff just isn’t funny.

Another day, another round of depressing but also inspiring testimony. We discuss: the Catholic church’s stance on gays, how conversion therapy doesn’t really work, how gays have almost no political representation, and the Mormons! Get ready!

A ruling is made in the case of Constance McMillen and the heteronormative prom and Newsweek interviews Dan Choi about his new radical stance on political action. Prop 8 opponents have to give show the other side internal emails and memos, which could push back the verdict on the Prop 8 trial. Also: two Malawi men arrested for getting engaged go on trial soon, and Lambda Legal is challenging for same-sex marriage in NJ.

Exodus International counters GLSEN’s message of tolerance with the “day of truth.” Health care is changing in NY and marriage recognition is changing in MD; Miss Beverly Hills is just as bitchy but not as pretty as Carrie Prejean, and the NAACP’s feelings about gay marriage could be maybe on the way to changing. Stuff might be happening again with the Prop 8 trial, people in the Netherlands are protesting the Catholic Church’s exclusion of gays, because obvs Jesus would love to go to your gay wedding.

Lady Gaga does mind control, Alex O’Laughlin is interviewed by TV Guide and Riese from Autostraddle is interviewed at Talk With Tim and Tegan & Sara are in the studio and omg so many things happening you lesbians.

Look, there are girls in The Advocate! (As well as muxes, a subculture of trans Mexicans!) In other news, articles on transpeople continue to be worded problematically, Helena’s interrogation tape is up, and adorable seventh graders attend their teachers same-sex wedding.