Hello everyone, welcome to another week of surveying the world of queer celebrity Instagram. It’s been a weird week; Kristen Stewart apparently showed off her toned torso and Ewan McGregor’s daughters are both bisexual I guess? We’re all doing fine. Go get yourself a latte.
This is what it would look like if you were on a beach chair, staring down at your girlfriend Janelle Monáe.
And this is what it would look like if she got up to get you a drink.
This is what Hayley Kiyoko would look like if Janelle got her that drink instead.
This is what it would look like if all my dreams came true at once.
OK so! A commenter asked me about the possibility of Emily Hampshire and Teddy Geiger breaking up. Honestly, I’M NOT 100% SURE – they haven’t posted about each other at all lately?
BUT THEN another commenter informed me that they recently saw Teddy Geiger’s very sexy profile on Tinder the other day, so all bets are off.
Gaby Dunn has gone full sea punk.
I have never enjoyed photos from someone else’s vacation quite as much as I’m enjoying photos from Stephanie Beatriz’s Japanese vacation.
I’m so glad there was finally a collaboration between Sesame Street and the cast of Westworld, because so many toddlers who are currently learning to read are also deeply into sexy cowboy robots?
I’ll very happily deal with a muppet Evan Rachel Wood. Or rather, a second, much smaller muppet Evan Rachel Wood.
I’M STILL DEALING WITH BABY SAMIRA WILEY. Samira Wiley’s birthday happens all year long.