Neil Patrick Harris, Lance Bass, Sarah Silverman & More Speak Out Against Gay Bullying

Celebrities are joining the commonfolk and making homemade videos for Dan Savage‘s It Gets Better Project in light of the recent gay teen suicides and making their own videos online. Follow the instructions on the YouTube channel to submit your own video!

Also a lot of other celebrities are using their starpower to rally for the cause; Nick News, which still exists, is airing a special this Sunday called “Sticks, Stones & Cyberslams – a Nick News Special With Linda Ellerbee” that airs Sunday.


Neil Patrick Harris makes a point that as we mature, people are actually drawn to individuals with different points of view, rather than the lemming high school mentality.



Lance Bass candidly admits that back in his Mississippi high school he himself was a bully to other gay teens because he was so focused on blending in with the cool kids.


Sarah Silverman keeps it quick and blunt: bullies learn their behavior from adults and the adult in America make it clear it’s okay to treat gays as less than by not allowing them to marry or serve in the military.



Nicki Minaj knows that she can’t possibly relate to the gay youth experience but points of that those who bully do so out of their own insecurities.



Ugly Betty‘s Michael Urie comments that the sheer number of It Gets Better internet videos proves there are countless people to turn all over the world.



Actress Brittany Snow speaks from personal experience with teen bullies and even had a friend commit suicide when she was younger.

Rapper Eve encourages kids to reach out to your local LGBT center if you are having a hard time in school.


Aubrey O’Day says that there’s “no such thing as cool.”


Backstreet Boy AJ McLean invites those who need support to tweet him and reach out to the Trevor Project Suicide Hotline at 866-488-7386.

Jewel remembers falling in love with her gay best friend and reminds us that society still has a lot of changing to do.

Lala & Ciara say that your life is in your hands!

Jill & Nikki from The Real L Word have a cute dog and are getting married next weekend did you know!


… and of course, last week, first and etc., Our Lady Ellen DeGeneres!

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Jess is a pop culture junkie living in New York City. She enjoys endless debates about The L Word, Howard Stern, new techy gadgets, DVR, exploring the labyrinth of the Lesbian Internet, memoirs, working out, sushi, making lists, artsy things, anything Lady Gaga touches, traveling, puppies, and nyc in the fall. Find her on Twitter @jessxnyc or via email.

Jess has written 240 articles for us.


  1. I watched this with my teen. She has two gay dads, and me her straight mom. Fortunately, she has not been bullied and has a Gay-straight alliance group at school that is awesome. But she and her friends work to get the word out at school about bullying, and I know that they will want to tell their friends about this project, if they don’t already know. Even though the “ordinary stories” are just as moving as those of the celebrities, I think that seeing someone who is famous and successful reach out has great power as well.

  2. Watching that Ellen clip over & over is one of the only things bringing me healing from all of this right now.

    I really want, “You should be alive to see it,” as a tattoo.

      • Right? & the meaning & the story behind it is so intense & beautiful & tragic that I think I would love explaining it to people who asked about it.

        (My financial situation as it is, I’m currently settling for the words just written on my arm.)

  3. Boy Jesus is coming back soon; the Rapture is happening now. Gay teenagers?? Gay lesbians committing suicide? WTF? Since when is it ok to be gay? God is NOWHERE in this country anymore. Where were all the gays and lesbians 40 years ago?? Nowhere. I don’t go for all this bullshit that SO many people are gay. Bullshit. America “reassures” America that it’s okay to be gay. Why? Because God is no where any more. NO WHERE. And you can all get angry w/ me and disagree, and say you were born gay-whatev. You know the truth, I know the truth. You’ re telling me there’s so many gay/lesbian people? Seriously? No, there’s not. It’s because America, again, makes everyone think it’s okay to be gay. Ok, then it’s ok to be a murderer. And drug dealer. And rapist. Yes, they are all sins in Gods eyes. Yes, it is a sin to be gay; if you think otherwise, then you don’t believe in God. Shame on you. The less God is around, the more sin that goes on in this country. No, I am NOT perfect. I sin, we all do. I just think enough is enough and i am so SICK of hearing about gays and lesbians, in such a positive way. GET MAD ALL YOU WANT, YOU GUYS SAY WHAT YOU WANT ON THIS WEBSITE, I HAVE JUST AS MUCH RIGHT AS YOU DO TO VOICE WHAT I WANT.

    • You know, you’re right: You can voice what you want, where you want. However, like Jen, I find it interesting that you’ve chosen to seek out gay media, and specifically, to attack a post about saving lives. You must know that we’re not interested in listening to the bigotry you’re propagating.

      I’m not mad at you. I pity you, surrounded by all your hate and rage. It must be stifling.

    • Did you really just compare being gay with being a murderer?

      And yes, you have the right to voice your opinion. But when your “opinions” cause gay teenagers to kill themselves? What does your God say to that? He must be reeeeal proud.

      You have the right to your wrong opinion.

    • What’s funny is that you’re on this site because you’re obviously one of the deeply closeted gays that are bullying more open gays because they are insecure about themselves.

      Otherwise, why would you be looking at this lesbian site?

    • it’s okay emily forrester one day a girl will meet you and want to touch your vaj as much as you want to touch hers. until then, you should just not say anything.

      sssshhh it’ll be okay

    • Instead of yelling about rapture and the end of the world, you should try and have some freaking hope. Instead of yelling about how gays and other people you hate have caused the world’s downfall maybe you should try and find some compassion within yourself. Maybe, just maybe, you should stop thinking about death, the apocalypse, and rapture and start believing in life and a better tomorrow for everyone.

      Sorry for the angry rant.

    • You don’t even understand the tenants of your religion, which I assume is christianity. Otherwise you wouldn’t be ranting on about god is no where and gays are everywhere. Who gave you the right to say it’s not right to be gay? You have the apocalypse and the rapture confused. Everything you wrote is nonsense. Learn to deal with your anxieties and fears. Stop suggesting you know the truth. Clearly, you do not. You are completely lacking in both knowledge and grace.

    • To make a long story short: I just used a time machine to return here and try to express the depth of my embarrassment, shame, and regret at the first comment I made (for me it was years ago, but for you only a day).

      My regret is inexpressible. This was an article about a series of suicides. These were people’s lives, and I perpetuated a very real and destructive form of hate with my petty, ignorant comment on what I at the time (somehow) believed to be true. All I can say is that I was extremely arrogant and uneducated, and that I have had to live with a knowledge of my actions since then. No matter what I believed, posting that here was incredibly uncivil, immature, and hateful.

      I’m not asking you to forgive me, but I want to say to you:

      I’m sorry.

      I’m sorry.

      I’m sorry.

      It gets better. I was just some stupid fool.

      over and out,
      -Emily of the Future

    • Of course it’s okay for you to voice your opinion, Emily. Just like it is okay for God to know that you’re wrong. :)

      I’m fairly certain your God knew what he was doing when he made us. :)

    • I’m about 99% sure my great-grandmother was a lesbian. (Okay, maybe not self-identified, but definitely attracted to women and not to men.) The details are personal and I’d rather not share them with the Great Wide Internet, but suffice to say I’ve got evidence.

      Where was she 40 years ago? Locking her bedroom door against her husband every night and having an affair with the lady down the street… :P

  4. Wow, interesting that the Christian who is SO SICK of hearing about gays in a positive way is seeking out a lesbian website. That’s an awful lot of hate to target at a post about trying to prevent CHILDREN from harming themselves. Wow, if this is Christianity i’m glad to be atheist.

  5. Some of these almost made me cry. I probably would have if I wasn’t sitting in a coffee shop. I want to share all of this to the world. I wish I could just find these kids that are having a tough time, and just give them a hug. I’m so glad that this “it gets better” movement is having a bit of affect. I can’t wait to see how this affects the world.

  6. In regards to Emily’s post, what the fuck do you mean “Where were the gays 40 years ago?” They were still fucking around, are you serious? True, with what progress we have made as a society, it has become more and more acceptable to be gay (thank fucking buddha), so more people feel comfortable coming out and discussing it. However, they still EXISTED prior to this time, they still fucking EXISTED. I think what you mean to ask is, “Where was all this bravery and equality advocacy 40 years ago?” Fuck you, speaking as a Christian. I’m sure Jesus is so proud of you sending his message of hate, intolerance and malice.
    God, and for you to say only 40 years ago. It was 1970 for fuck’s sake (the year you were born perhaps, since you obviously haven’t bothered to research THE MERE EXISTENCE of homosexuals before then). You obviously were sheltered your entire life until one day shocked and disgusted at this new radical and unnatural phenomenon of homosexuality!
    I’m sorry to all the people reading this wishing I would shut up and stop stooping to this fucker’s level, I normally can view these kinds of comments and brush them off LIKE A GODDAMN ADULT, but I’ve had enough of this bullshit, all of these tragic suicides, not to mention day-to-day insults and ignorant assumptions, and then this heartless monster has the audacity to insult homosexuals and assert that her lifestyle is the holy and right one for everyone.
    We don’t do that to you, you asshole. Yeah you’re entitled to your shitty, judgmental, selfish, misinformed fucking opinion, so keep it up.

    Sigh. ANYWAY. I will say I have been so happy seeing all of the videos in the “It Gets Better” project. How can a person stand against suicide prevention? I just don’t get it.

    I love you gays and lesbians and bisexuals and queers of all shapes and sizes and colors and lifestyles and careers, you/we are all beautiful and that is literally all I have the emotional capacity to internalize.

  7. My Women’S Studies class just watched the Ellen one together. We all were choked up by the time she was.
    23 women, two genderqueers, sitting in a classroom, starring at a screen, eyes brimming with tears.

    And Emily Forrester: i know you have a right to voice your opinion on here, but autostraddle is my safe space. I don’t bash God in the church parking lot, so please don’t bash gays on a gay blog.

    I don’t feel safe.

  8. glee is the. best. show. about. a. glee. club. on. FOX.
    especially for introducing my heart to this guy,

    the writers at FOX have an annoying habit of taking my thoughts and making kurt say them? like about the word f-g and about g-d or lack thereof and now about this so this is nice.

  9. I just wanted to say that, I love you, Autostraddle community. As much as someone can love a bunch of people out in cyberspace, who they don’t know personally, but who’s presence on the interwebs is like a ray of sunshine in a black cloud of trollz and negativity.

    It may please you to read an anecdote from my life.

    I have a 200lb hetero-bulgarian-beef-cake-male-friend and fellow university student who once said that he rejected homophobia simply because “only stupid people are homophobic, and [he is] not stupid”. Now I wouldn’t necessarily endorse this perspective, (as one could misread it to mean “all stupid people are homophobes”) , but it gave me some chuckles, and some hope. I honestly half expected this guy to be a homophobe because I’m a horrible racial and sexual profiler! (I’m working on it). I think my friend’s view pretty much sums up the views of most academics/post secondary students these days. So my queer pals, at least we’ve got allies that can provide us with good dinner conversation. Oh yes: AND PROFESSIONAL SOCIOLOGICAL/PSYCHOLOGICAL/CULTURAL/BIOLOGICAL/ETC. LEGITIMIZATION. Not that we really need it, but in case any one wasn’t sure (like Emily Forrester).

  10. Nope, I surely didn’t seek out a gay website-I followed a link on to see if it was sadly true if hot Lance Bass was gay, so you’re all wrong there:) Didn’t mean to cause so much of a stir when I posted my opinion-yes I did! We have to hear about all the “gays” and “lesbians” constantly, and believe me, I’m surely not the only person who is so sick of hearing about you. And, MY God is proud of me for speaking up to you people; yes, you people; yes, I compared you, in a way, to murderers, because murderers are also sinners; however, so you people don’t get your gay panties in a bunch, I am also a sinner, which of course you didn’t read THAT part, all you read is someone who thinks differently than you. I sin; I smoke pot, I lie, hell, I called off work today, and I lied about it. I, also, can be compared to a murderer, as again, that is a sin. I’m so so sick of hearing about these poor teenagers who say they’re gay, then kill themselves for catching hell for it.

      • I’m new, so I’m not sure about the replying format, but was your comment “life must be so hard” directed at me or Emily?

        how do I know which comments are in reply and to what? I’m a bit lost.

    • I never usually do this but I’m sorry. I am upset.

      Emily Forrester: Did you now that judging is also a sin, according to your bible? One that you’re obviously embracing, just like I’m embracing the fact that I’m gay. It’s one thing to voice your opinion and another to be ridiculously rude and insulting while you’re at it. I am sick of explaining things to people who will never ‘get it’, so let’s put it this way…you are complaining about teenagers who are in danger of killing themselves because of bullying – on a blog meant to save those lives. What kind of a Christian are you?! Well, I guess we’ll meet in Hell, won’t we?

    • Rest assured Emily. US PEOPLE are tired of hearing about/from YOU PEOPLE as well. Don’t you know that you’ll never win souls for “the kingdom” that way?

    • Wait… you followed a link on MSNBC? The liberal media? BWAHAHA!!! Emily, don’t lie, you were checking out Rachel Maddow! It’s ok, I think she’s hot too! You’ll be accepted here, it’s ok. You don’t have to throw down with “Hot” Lance Bass. Whatever chick, if you have eyeballs you know Lance is gay, But he’s also kind of pretty…. COME OUT OF THE CLOSET EMILY!! Seriously, snogging a girl is MUCH more fun than boys…

    • We’re all sinners Emily. You, me, my cat, your monkey.


  11. Emily. Don’t worry, I’m not being a snark at you. ;)

    Look at the indents. See how my comment starts to the left of yours? (Unless you’ve got a wonky browser setup or are using a screenreader or something…) If it was to the right of yours, I would be replying to you. Think of it like a multi-level outline. Diver’s comment is 1, your reply to her is 1a, mine is 2. (Does that make sense?)

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