I’m a Stone Butch Top Who Can’t Bring Myself To Penetrate Anyone Else

Welcome to the AF+ Advice Box, in which we answer all the queer and lesbian advice questions from AF+ members who submitted their queries into our AF+ ask box! And...now advice is going up WEEKLY.

Hi. I am a stone butch who has never penetrated someone, but who wants to try. I’m struggling to get over the empathetic feelings of “Aaa! Vaginal penetration is painful and bad” when I know that’s not how a lot of people feel. But it is how I feel about my own body. How do I sort of lean into a more understanding feeling regarding others’ desire for penetration?

Nico: Thank you so much for writing in! To start from the broadest possible standpoint, every single person's body is different, and also, so is every person's relationship to t...

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