Polyamory is all fun and games until you get an STI from one partner and then your other partner shames you for it. STIs aren’t fun, but they do happen. Learn how to discuss safety frameworks, talk about the risks, and actively engage with consent.
We could all do with a little bit more self-care right now; this how-to takes you through one dyke’s journey to find joy and slowness through The Pause Project. Learn about her process and read about some ways you can curate a self-care project like this for yourself.
sometime this year you are going to steal your first pack of cigarettes from *redacted*’s mom: please don’t ? you will like them far too much and also will feel bad forever for stealing
Advice for coping with a parent who’s an addict, being accountable to people you’re dating, and more!
What if you don’t like receiving oral sex, but want to? What if you canNOT get your new crush/person out of your head, but need to focus on work? What to do if you’re longing for queer chosen family, but don’t feel like you’ve gotten there, and more!
If casual dating is a thing you want, you can do it! I believe in you / us / our ability to not get married on the third date.
14 first messages that will have you burning up your matches list (with queer pop culture references!).
The confident vibe you get from me? The “naturally sexy” way you (might) think I am? It’s not natural at all. It’s a choice; it can be learned. Here’s how!
Grief is not linear, finding help for your top surgery recovery, ways to alleviate feelings of isolation while staying home, and more!
Advice for when you want to nurture a partnership but also honor your independence, for when you’re not sure if you want contact with an ex, on working through discomfort with your own sexuality, and more!
The idea of breaking up, and/or transitioning your relationship to platonic as somehow a failure or throwing something away is one of those pesky ideas we need to unlearn.
“THIS STEP IS VERY IMPORTANT, DO NOT PUT THE BOILING HOT TEA BAGS ON YOUR EYELIDS!!!” Queer advice on breaking up with someone over social distancing opinions as well as advice on pressure from friends to hang out in-person instead of staying home (during this here pandemic), returning to writing after a betrayal, recovering from a good cry, and more!
Your partner doesn’t want to talk about raising your kids to be anti-racist, longing to reach out to a former friend, and more!
Is it a “friend” coffee or a “date” coffee, unemployed and feeling unmoored, negotiating initiating intimacy in a relationship with two people on the asexual spectrum, you feel like your best friend is making questionable dating decisions, grooming your armpit hair, taking a break from therapy, you’ve never been in a long-term relationship, trying to exist outside of capitalism, possible pelvic floor concerns — and more!
Boundaries are our manifestations of how we deserve to be treated and what we will accept from others.
We asked you for the political questions or issues keeping you up at night. From getting started in activism, to questions about phone banking and volunteering, to the Supreme Court and what will happen with the legalization of gay marriage, untangling the United States’ electoral system, talking to your conservative relatives, and more — the Autostraddle team takes on your questions related to the US election. We’re all super stressed, but at least we have each other!
Advice for the cis, presumably het parents of a trans kid, Zoom dating while in the house with your parents, an urban legend and gay panic, gender feelings, squirting ALL of the time, and understanding your expectations in a relationship with someone who is not nearly as out!
Welcome to the first installment of #PolyamoryProblems, a new advice column on Autostraddle. There are countless things I wish I had known before I started out, and lucky for you I’m here to tell you the things that will hopefully make your transition into polyamorous relationships much smoother.
Stating your needs around masturbation in a relationship, moving on from an on-again-off-again relationship, your dad hasn’t worked through his homophobia, and more!
Who were your fictional heroes? What were the stories that were told to you in the songs that you played on loop? Who were the artists who sang them, and how did their lives – so close to fiction anyway, by virtue of Hollywood tabloid culture – create stories for you? What did you imagine for yourself, as a teen?
Dating and inexperience and some really positive advice about this, grieving while starting graduate school, coping with feelings of jealousy and more!