FRIDAY OPEN THREAD: Gal Pals Gone Wild!

Friendlets, it’s Spring Break!!!!!!!!! I am almost done with 10 full days of freedom from the oppressive schooling institution, and what a ten days it has been! Spring Break in Austin lines up with South by Southwest, which is brilliant. Most people who’ve lived in Austin more than 8 months realize that this week would be the week to GET OUT of town (speaking of, have you seen Get Out yet? I’m scared to see it, I want to trust white people), alas, I was not so smart. The thing about this city is that it is very small. It’s super narrow, but really long, and all of the cool, hip stuff that Austin is known for takes place in like a two square mile radius. So when SXSW comes along, something like 10 million people are trying to get along in a very teeny space. Traffic is always awful here, but I haven’t seen anything like this before.

Even though traffic is a nightmare and there are people everywhere, I bought a wristband to encourage me explore this city I almost never get to see. And I’m so thrilled that I did. I went wild this week y’all. I got two new piercings, made new tattoo appointments with this sweet woman tattoo artist I’ve been insta-lusting over, and saw more bands than I’ve seen in the last three years combined. I also went to what feels like a million parties with free Topo Chico, the cheapest beer you could ever dream of, and just straight whiskey (which I gladly stayed away from). I also actually got a lot of work done. I wrote one paper and rewrote another, read three books for school and one for pleasure, and knocked out a bunch of grading. My focus for the week was “No FOMO” and like, it worked. I did what I could when I could and didn’t put pressure on myself to do much more and still managed to play hard and work hard.

me, the queer stereotype of your dreams.

So this is what I want to know from y’all this week: how did you get wild and crazy? What thing did you do that made you feel more alive than ever before? Was it dressing up your dog in that cute sweater you got them? Be honest. Did you finally ask that cute barista out? (P.S. How do you do that??? They’re at work! Asking for a friend, obviously). Even if you’re in the godless north dealing with two or more feet of snow, I bet you did something wild, and I want to know about it. Get in those comments and make my day! I love you!

do you know about Vagabon??? you should.


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Profile gravatar of Alaina

Alaina is a 20-something working on a PhD in Performance as Public Practice. They are a mom to three cats, they listen to a lot of NPR and musicals, and they spend a lot of time on Pinterest lusting over studio apartments. They are actively trying to build A Brand on twitter @alainamonts. One day, they will be First Lady of the United States.

Alaina has written 91 articles for us.

142 Comments

  1. 5

    you with your topo chico! total queer stereotype of my dreams!

    yeah, babe and I were gonna head to austin and then quickly revised that plan after we realized when sxsw is. ugh, too much. now, coming in may.

    We’re also going to LA in a few weeks which I haven’t been to in ages and I used to hang out there all the time, excited to get to my old stomping grounds/beach/Seattle is so gray and sad, you guys, literally people feel alive for the first time in months bc there are crocuses.

    Otherwise, this week was bonkers, and I did all this trauma therapy, and it is luminous and beautiful and everything I wish for in this world to help queer people heal, and also it’s the end of the week and I am worn the fuck out. I’ll probably go for lots of walks and be unavailable for feels-dumping, because the dump is closed currently while some of the shit that got dumped there this week decomposes.

    in other news I’m reading this book called dreadnought which is on the one hand about a teen transgal superhero and that is rad, but unfortch also uses a lot of gendered insults/ I really hate how common it is in sci fi/fantasy/super hero jazz to talk about “white capes” or whatever to mean ppl that are good and “black capes”to mean bad guys. It’s pretty fucking basic, and distracting from something that is otherwise a thing that should exist in the world (trans superheroes!). Far as I can tell the author is a decent human, and that trope is typical for the genre, it’s just shitty and annoying.

    I haven’t seen Get Out yet (maybe this weekend?) but sposed to be great!

    And I’m setting up an appointment to get a new tattoo- hoping for a botanical half-sleeve! Just waiting for the tattoo artist to follow up so we can talk more.

    Hope all you sweet peas have a really great weekend!

      • 2

        For sure, I mean also to be clear I think the author is a trans woman, and the significance of trans authorship about trans characters is something I feel strongly about, so all of this critique falls under “this book should exist, and…”

        tbh my feelings about the language might not even occur to a younger audience, and literally I find it annoying that the main character is like,”self, don’t be a pussy”- in a way that definitely mimics how their shitty dad talks to them, and I’m hoping that in the greater arc of the book they go through a process of being like “oh I should not talk to myself the way my dad talks to me” but idk yet.

        and full stop use of things like black/white to mean bad/good is anti-black, and that is v much part of the language of the superheros of the book, and I really think that sucks, and also would I tell teenagers to never read this book, probably not. that’s my particular feelings, and I don’t think they’re wrong, and my feeling is more “I don’t like this particular thing, maybe I will write to the author about that, it is nobody’s strongest work, it might influence her” and less “Nobody should read this book ever”.

        Does that answer your question?

  2. 6

    Hey friends! I am so glad this week is overrr! (Or will officially be over for me in about four hours!). I didn’t really do anything too crazy this week-I did stand up to my employer and have a “meeting” next week to talk about my concerns, which I’m not anticipating going very well, BUT I also successfully advocated for a client to get some expenses paid for him while he is incarcerated so he is able to do normal human things like make phone calls and have soap and shampoo, and will also hopefully be eligible for work release soon! Yay! So that makes me feel really good, even if I had to ruffle A LOT of feathers to get there!

    I also started volunteering with a needle exchange program this week, which serves primarily the indigenous community near me and is done all through volunteers and individual appointments/deliveries-we’re a rural area so we don’t have a fancy van or office or anything like you probably imagine when you think of needle exchange. But I’m so excited to be doing this work and serving my community this way!

    Otherwise, it’s been a busy/weird week and I haven’t done the best job of taking care of myself (I have a messy house, have been eating like garbage, haven’t really worked out this week), so this weekend will hopefully be spent catching up on some of those tasks and other community-related work I’m doing, and hopefully having some nice quiet time for myself as well!

  3. 7

    Well my version of Spring Break is next week, but I am kicking it off with a high/low culture smorgasbord. Tonight I go see Motzart’s opera,The Magic Flute, then tomorrow I am going to Rocky Horror, with a newly out Rocky virgin. Then the rest of the week is all about playing with my pony (we are doing a 3 night pack trip in the desert) and catching up on Buffering the Vampire Slayer with my very best gal pals. Is that, or is that not an ideal way to spend a week?

  4. 13

    So I am really excited it is Friday, because I have been really excited to post this on AS since Monday because you all are so nice and supportive… About a month ago, I posted on here when I was about to take my NCLEX (nursing board exam) and that I was scared I was going to fail it and never find a job as a nurse, and I’d be destined to stay at my horrible boring call center job forever, and everyone on here was so kind and supportive… and now, my dear friends, I have been offered a position at a hospital in a really fun new city where I will be able to experience new culture and new people and I’m very happy about it! I have always wanted to move out of my home state of CT (Don’t get me wrong, I love Connecticut, but it’s a small state, and we live in a big world!) but thus far, in my 26 years of life, it has never worked out with school and work and everything. But this opportunity kind of fell in my lap and I decided to take it!

    I have been expressing a lot of gratitude over the past week or so, because I have had a really hard year (accelerated BSN program = me in a bad mood 95% of the time) and I wouldn’t have made it without the support of various people/entities in my life.. And Autostraddle is one of them! Even though I didn’t have much time to read it during school, it was always there when I did have time. And knowing this community is always here means so much to me. So thanks people! Love y’all.

  5. 8

    Hey friends!
    I’m currently trying to work out how to describe camp to my Head-of-Year in an email. I need to miss a couple of lectures and can’t just not turn up. I need their permission. How can I phrase it so that they realise how much it would benefit me personally? I always struggle to describe camp to people, which is why I thought an email might be better than going to her office and just crying LET ME GO TO GAY CAMP I BEG OF YOU!
    Thoughts?

  6. 11

    I got some major news this week. I’ve been promoted to Senior Developer at work! I did not expect it at all, and it’s kind of ridiculous to think that that’s the highest title for a developer to have and I have it…

    Because I received that good news, I decided to go ahead and go to A-Camp 😀

    I also went to a Harry Potter themed bad to celebrate my promotion, and I had a really nice time 🙂

    So all around great week!

  7. 6

    I’m on spring break currently (ending this weekend) but somehow I’m busier than during school. I’m in a frenzy applying for stuff, looking for housing for after graduation (found a likely place tho), trying to finish a comic to send to the printer in time to sell at conventions/art festivals in two weeks, preparing to do more screenprinting…so I’m a little all over the place but I’m just trying to move forward as fast as possible.

    On the other side of all the stress is the excitement of finally being able to share the comic I worked on all last semester, and tabling at an art fest by myself for the first time. I used to be much more scared about these things, but I try to say yes to every good opportunity I come across in the hope that it’ll force me to do more and be braver (it works).

  8. 13

    Member of the godless north here. We got something like 25cm of snow in Ottawa on Tuesday, which happened to also be my birthday. Which meant that a bunch of people couldn’t make it to my birthday dinner, which was sad.

    But then I spent the next two days literally hibernating and didn’t leave my apartment as I prepped for two job interviews on Thursday. One went pretty well, the other not so well, but I’d appreciate all the good vibes ya’ll can send as I wait to hear back!

    And then tonight will be a St. Patrick’s Day Queers & Beers special, where hopefully I will get some sweet pics to send in for the Autostraddle Friday Night gallery!

  9. 10

    Happy Friday, lambs and lizards! I’m in a weird time in my life where suddenly I can’t really drink anymore. Like I’d be happy to, but when I do, I feel kinda poisoned and depressed, and not at all tipsy/fun. This was a fairly sudden change, after being a regular drinker throughout my twenties, and it’s super weird! When I see someone drinking in real life or tv my stomach turns, instead of my feeling inspired to get a drink too. This has been going on for a month or two now! Is this growing up? Because I miss beer! Has this happened to anyone else?

    Due to this sudden change I am now singlehandedly keeping La Croix in business, I think!

    Anywho. Hi loves!

    • 5

      I’ve had similar experiences with drinking alcohol in the past couple of years! I don’t think I get the poisoned / depressed feeling so much when I’m tipsy, but even with just a drink or two, the next day, I have what I call an “emotional hangover.” No physical symptoms, and the events of the night prior could have been entirely fun, but I feel down / depressed / anxious in the aftermath.

      Not sure if that’s similar at all, but I just wanted to share in a solidarity La Croix with you!

    • 4

      You know, something strange has happened to me with alcohol, too. I used to have a pretty high tolerance, and I still do in that I don’t really get drunk, per se, even after several high-alcohol pct. beers (my drink of choice), but what happens is that I have terrible sleep disturbances afterwards. I either can’t fall asleep no matter what, or I fall asleep for a couple hours and then wake up and stay that way. This makes me feel like crap, probably from the tiredness more than anything.

      But I’m drinking tonight, so fuck it!

  10. 8

    I started a new short term contract doing web design at a university (it came through after 3 1/2 months of so many hoops to jump through that is given up on it). And my first day was Monday when the students were on spring break and the campus was covered in snow. Spring in Chicago is not for the faint hearted!

    I’m planning to spend this weekend with my best gal pals – my cat and my e-reader – while my partner’s out of town for his dad’s b-day.

    I can’t remember if I’ve squeed about Kris Ripper’s Queers of LaVista series yet. I probably have. I love these novels so, so much. It’s a queer romance series with an overarching murder mystery. The portrayal of queer community is so good that community is almost a separate character. There’s a range of pairings and identities (f/f, m/m, m/f, trans, cis, bi, pan, gay, poly). And it’s fun and funny. I read the 5th and final book in the series last month and I’m kind of mourning the end of the series.

  11. 6

    Never heard of Topo Chico. How is it compared to Natty Ice, which is usually the cheapest thing that comes to mind, besides the surprisingly solid Caguama(the beer brand not the slang for a 40oz) light. It’s what I drank in college while white people parties always had Natty Ice & one guy always going shut up bro, Natty Ice is good for the price. Now if I want to go budget I got simple times beer from trader Joes either the lager or pilsner, both solid for $4 a 6-pack.

    My week has been kind of long. Some dysphoria here and there, some I hate the internet, and a lot of wow that person is a cute queer, or Damn it okc why are you showing me straight women? Seriously, have been email chatting okc support and they told me other than searching for dudes I’m stuck being shown mostly straight women, despite having queer and agender on my profile.

    On the plus side my birthday is close & I think I am going to drive to SD for the weekend to go snorkeling and hang with a fellow straddler/dear friend. We already skipped spring & enjoying summer right now. And a friend is going queer bar hopping for her birthday this weekend so that’s always a good way to meet more lgbtq folks!

    I went to Leo Carrillo Beach and state Park over the weekend with a relative of mine. It was also 95f by his house in the Valley but once we got to beach near county line weather went down to 63 degrees with loads of marine layer. It was really nice & lead to some beautiful views. Water was nice too. With a lot friendly seagulls.

    Thank you for viewing and reading my post. Have a positive weekend.

  12. 4

    Technically this happened last week but it happened since last FOT– I’m still riding a wave from last Saturday where I got to stand mere feet from Neko Case while she performed. And…and I ended up with the set list from the show. I haven’t been so enamored with an artist’s work since I was 12 and discovered Stevie Nicks.

    I’ve had a really killer week at work. Super busy working on some projects for a summit. The one big presentation I put together turned out way better than expected and my boss was very impressed. Then today I had professional headshots taken so I came to work looking better than okay. I’m trying to take all this goodness and success in stride and not dwell on the inevitable downturns that happen in life.

    Tomorrow I’m taking off for an extended weekend in the mountains and I’m so ready and needing this time away. This is the start of the last week of my twenties, which I couldn’t be more excited about. My twenties, especially early on, were filled with such anguish and confusion. I’m looking forward to this new decade.

    Hope everyone has a great weekend!

  13. 10

    It’s been a week!!

    My biggest wild and crazy thing was having a colonoscopy, which was not the most fun I’ve ever had, except that the drugs they give you are pretty great. Also the nurses are amazing. Can I just say how awesome nurses are? Doctors are all fine and whatever, but it’s the nurses that crack jokes about how you shouldn’t sign any contracts when you’re coming down from the drugs and make you feel okay about suddenly being very emotional because you’re lying in a hospital bed about to undergo a procedure and you haven’t talked to your mom in months, and smile at you when you’re rambling nonsense in recovery. Nurses. Are. The. Best. Also before they did the procedure they had to do a pregnancy test and — Yay! Not Pregnant!! (That would have been some immaculate conception shit.)

    Also I did my storytelling performance last weekend where I got in front of people and talked about growing up mormon and how my mom used to be my hero when I was a kid and now we don’t speak because she’s become this toxic presence in my life and I cried a little but it felt really cathartic. And I got a lot of awesome feedback about it so I’m feeling very much like a huge bad ass right now!!

  14. 4

    Meowdy folks,

    Well, I actually did a ton of work this week, and also my taxes. Today I am attempting to design myself a business card (which I am not good at) and use Inkscape to do so (which I am REALLY not good at, as I’m much more experienced with raster editors and still not much at that).

    But it’s all good and it was all worthwhile, because I did it so that I can have a blast this weekend and next week without thinking about work. Tonight, I get to enjoy the first of my perks for having bought VIP tickets to my local Comic and Geek Expo. Guys, I am going to meet Chris Motherfucking Claremont. For those of you who don’t know who that is, he just wrote the best years of a little ol’ comic called X-men and invented a few characters you may have heard of, no one special, y’know, just STORM. ROGUE. KITTY PRYDE. PSYLOCKE. He’s also responsible for the definitive characterization of Wolverine, and you sure as hell are not going to find a bigger Wolverine fangirl than me. I’ve never been to a con before and I have no idea how this VIP access thing works, but tonight I’m going to give him a hand-colored printout of the really famous “I am PHOENIX!” panel with Jean bursting out of the water (yeah, he wrote that story) I made just for him. Tomorrow I may ask him to sign my ratty old trade paperback copy of the original Wolvie miniseries he did with Frank Miller. I know, I know, 32 going on 15, but I don’t give a damn. I will never apologize for liking things.

    Then, next week, I’m going to a hugely important professional conference, and taking a break from rubbing elbows with a gaggle of academic librarians I will get to enjoy my front row seats to listen to Roxane Gay talk. I bought a copy of Bad Feminist just so I could have her writing fresh in my mind when I hear her speak. I know I probably won’t get to sit down and have a chat with her or anything, but I would love to ask her about being a writer in academia and her experience of that.

    On a more personal level, I know I’m trying to wrap up my second masters degree and find a Real Job and all that nonsense, but I’ve been so excited about my writing. I spent hours talking to someone about it yesterday who made the mistake of being interested and asking questions. I am so close to releasing the first “issue”, probably next month (I need to make a cover…ugh…) in the first week or two. I don’t care if I never make a dime or lose money on it. I have loved this story and these characters that I’ve made for over ten years now. Working on it sustained me through many a lonely, rainy night in China. I’m ready to share it with the world.

    Have a fantastic weekend, everybody! I know I will!!!

  15. 5

    Hello! I’m feeling pretty shitty right now– my Midwestern hellscape is cold and snowy again, my spring break is still weeks away, and I got some bad medical news.

    Because of some genetic issues with my blood, I can’t go on hormones any time soon. If I ever end up taking them, they’ll have to be paired with blood thinners and a watchful eye. This would’ve been alright a bit ago, but now there’s the new Republican healthcare bill and I have NO idea what the fuck is going on.

    It’s really debilitating because I’ve been clinging to this image of myself finally graduating and going out into the world with the body I want, but that will have to be delayed. I’m super bummed and angry and exhausted all at once, and it’s hard to confide in people IRL– most schoolmates don’t know I’m nonbinary, and I think this would also carry with it the assumption that I’m a binary trans guy and fully identify with manhood.

    Any advice? I am IN THE DUMPS on St. Paddy’a day!!!

    • 2

      I just wanted to reach out to say that I feel your pain re: genetic issues, hormones (though maybe/probably for different outcomes based on the rest of your post), and blood thinners. I’m on blood thinners now for a huge DVT in my dominant arm and they’ve ended up being not the worst. Life on them isn’t fantastic, nor is it without risk, but it’s manageable. Also, xarelto’s maker has a co-pay program so you don’t have to pay $35 or whatever a month. I hope things work out for you. Sending warm fuzzies <3

  16. 5

    I’ve been sick with stomach flu and have restored my strenght just in time for the weekend. Since I participated in the strike last week, my students are now convinced that I am permanently on strike, which is very weird.

    On a more positive note, even if I’ve been trapped inside for the last three days, I feel the spring and I am so excited! This is definitely my favourite season: lighter clothing, warmer, brighter days, and on Sunday a concert in a garden. I can’t wait. I’m gonna bake a vegan chocolate cake for the occasion.

    I’ve also just discovered the singer LP and I am totally in love! Can’t believe I was missing out on so much.

    Have a nice weekend everybody!

  17. 15

    Howdy, friends! This past week has been a rollercoaster of delight for me, personally, and I hope also for many of you.

    Last Saturday night, my majestic dog beast and I were in a dog show for our local low-cost spay and neuter clinic. It’s their big fundraiser gala. The majestic dog beast was the happiest he has ever been in his whole life, as it allowed him to be petted by and to show his majestically floofy belly to very many people. He wore his rainbow bowtie, and was quite the fetching gentleman – pun intended. Here we are at the show, doing our best Blue Steel.

    There’s a group of 3 of us girls here that are all very close, and one of them has a birthday this weekend. Since spring has sprung here, the other two of us decided to buy one of those inflatable pools with the filter from Amazon to have for the summer and open the season this weekend! We are throwing her a pool party, complete with juice bar and snow cone machine. I had tank tops made for our crew, and we are ready for a daytime throw down fiesta.

    I mean, what’s gayer than matching glittery tank tops?

  18. 5

    We had spring sunshine yesterday! I was a blissful little sprout waiting in the sunny spots at my bus stop. I have a weekend trip to Seattle planned for next month, so I’m going to count that as my spring break even though the weather will probably be unsurprisingly shittastic. I’m generally in a good mood these days, particularly after receiving a much needed pay check…I’m going to be 99% responsible with that money….but also go on Etsy and find some pins to queer up my denim jacket for spring. I work on Sundays again, so Saturdays are my only real weekend and I intend to spend that time cleaning (jk I’ll be watching Buffy), doing some yard work (jk I’ll be watching Buffy), and meal prepping in the kitchen (jk I’ll be watching Buffy).

    Anyway…cheers to all y’all and I hope you have time to spend your weekends the way you want to!

  19. 7

    You know when you have like a bad week…? I’ve been having mildly bad luck for about six months. Like, legit, I have had TWO trees hit my apartment.

    Last week was not great. This week was exhausting, and to give y’all an idea of the WTF of it: I literally rolled up to a gas station and none of the pumps would give me gas. It got to the “please remove nozel and pump” part…and none, no matter what buttons i pushed or how I removed it, none would work. I even went to different ones…same issue.

    AND NO ONE ELSE had the problem. Even the people working there were confused.

    Other highlights included random shoe lace breaking and meeting new managers by falling on my ass.

    I’m at the point of serious: does anyone have like a uncrossing thing they have up their sleeve? Its ridiculous.

    On the plus… I am at least rebounding from my puddle of tears and stress situation for now…but, lo, trump family dinner tomorrow so forecast is low

      • 1

        I laugh in the midst of it all–but I’m just at the point of “really…??? really… come on now”

        The first time I walked into my bedroom and saw a hole in the ceiling with a tree sticking out of it. For a few days I had a yard sign stapled up there and prayed there was no rain. Second time… light damage but no leaking. At least I’m renting?

        My mom also broke her foot twice…right before I was taking her on vacation each time! You have to laugh but also…why?

  20. 7

    Being in Scotland, the most Godless and Northern place you can get before you hit literal frozen wastelands filled with vikings, it is not Spring Break for me. So I wrote over ten thousand words this week and now literally can’t use my right hand. Voice typing sucks and keeps interpreting the name Afzal as “A song”.

  21. 14

    I’m going to law school guys! I got into my top choice school and I even got a merit scholarship. It’s approximately a bajillion dollars less than the worse private schools I applied to. I’ll definitely be able to afford a public interest career and I am so happy. For the past four years I have been tensed up about this and now I can finally relax knowing there’s a clear path in my future.

    My temp job is ending in a week, which would have terrified me but now I’m just heading into a deserved vacation. I’m gonna enjoy this summer so much and prep for law school and do basically everything my little queer heart desires.

  22. 10

    It is definitely not spring break for me, but the company I work for gave us pie on Pi day, I’ve gotten progressively less depressed as the week has gone on, and I get to dogsit for a friend tomorrow, so there will be puppy cuddles! On International Women’s Day, I shared an essay I wrote about my experience getting an abortion at Planned Parenthood, and so many people said nice things and not a single person gave me a hard time about it (though to be fair I had the security on the post locked down so my conservative family members couldn’t see it.) It’s been above freezing for the past 2 days, and I might even go for a run on Saturday. Things are looking up.

  23. 4

    Well I’m having a helluva time at the dayjob which is probably by tonight I’m watching the Little Mermaid and dissecting it wrt my childhood and the fact I was a 6 year old baby gay when I saw it last.
    I have Easter break coming up in 3 weeks ish and I’m actually terrified of how fast time is passing towards that. Not because of the break but because of what is after dayjob wise.
    Today I went to the barbers and got my fortnightly tidy up, and then the comic book store to pick up the new Batwoman. I think the dude in the store finally gets that I’m gay-I mean the flannel and the haircut didn’t tip him off before but…*shrugs*. He asked how I knew about America the other week, because “it’s not that well publicised” well dude it is in my corner of the Internet. The good news is he loved the comic, which I guess means he’ll recommend it to folks which can only be a good thing!
    I have to work tomorrow because the kid who normally works the desk at the weekend has taken off to see her “friend” who I’m sure she has a crush on (even though she doesn’t realise she does…because she’s in fucking narnia) so yeah. Who am I to stand in the way of unrequited young love…urgh.
    Have great weekends folks! Hope they are awesome and possibly filled with queer critiques of childhood movies…

  24. 2

    I want to be real and open, so here is a REAL introduction of meselfs!
    I’m doing reiki training in a month. I’m a woowoo woman and my spirit guide told me my totem animal is a hummingbird. I’m almost done with a first draft of my first REAL DEAL script.
    I have a lot of lesbian dreams/fantasies, but I still feel the need to cuddle with men. I do miss mancuddles. I’m interning as a content director with a greenhouse. I want to work on the rez. I’m all over the place and accidentally say things off the cuff. I’m working on complaining less.
    aaannnd, I’m working on finding peace with being ambiguously brown/brown in general.
    YAY, everyone have a sexy happy weekend!

  25. 4

    Alas so far this week I have done nothing wild! I just went to a presentation about Orgullo Crítico which is an activist branch of Pride working against the capitalist consumerism mentality of it, making it more accessible, increasing diversity etc. This year we have World Pride in Madrid so it’s even more important to raise these issues.

    Tomorrow I have a meeting of an all women bondage group which will be fun! And also hopefully meeting up with a girl I’ve been chatting to on OK Cupid.

    Hope those of you with spring break have a great time! Love to y’all xx

  26. 2

    Super not doing good right now.

    Don’t trust country club white people Right Lain, they aren’t actually people but demons in disguise who feed upon souls and snack on suffering.

    Totally unrelated but BtVS leaves Netflix on April 1st.
    Is that for real or special funny that ain’t actually funny?
    Anybody know the score on that?

  27. 7

    Hi friends, I have had a really stressful few weeks of everything changing hourly with my gazillion freelance/actually-employee-but-classified-as-freelance jobs and financial situation and then I got an interview for a corporate job, which dropped into my lap through a series of things. I didn’t think this would go anywhere and working a fancy corporate job has totally not been my background or life plan, but it’s interesting and would make good use of my skills/brain. I’ve been desparate for some stability and being able to plan the future *at all*, and I’ve had this romanticized businesslady vision in my head for a long time, and Corporate Job is far less creative than the jobs I’ve had but at the same time I’ve been too busy scrambling for work trying to pay rent and eat for so long that I haven’t been able to work on anything creative I actually care about in months anyway, and have neither money nor energy to contribute to the things important to me.

    And then! I got a call from an LGBTQ non-profit where I applied for Amazing Job, and today I had the interview for Corporate Job and they seem to really like me. The non-profit interview is next week and I’m worried timing is going to intersect very inconveniently for both positions, what do I do? Can I knock Amazing Job’s socks off enough that they speed up their hiring process?

    Also I am realizing I haven’t done anything remotely wild or crazy in ages and now I’m sad.

  28. 9

    I got a raise! I have been seething because the men in my group make more than me. (Significantly more…)
    (for example my senior partner makes 56% more per hour. I would need 4 cents per dollar raise every year for the next 20 years to catch up with him. My 1 prior raise, in 3 years, was 1 cent per dollar. Not even the 3% living wage adjustment. )
    I am the only full time women. The only one fully qualified to work the job (ie I have all the degrees and certifications now required.)

    But I got a raise this week. A 20 cent per dollar raise!! Woohoo!! 💵💵 I have been working my tail off doing extra projects and contributing much more than everyone else. (You know work twice as hard for less…) but it looks like it finally paid off!!

  29. 4

    next week is finals and then i’m free! until spring quarter, but i’m only taking three classes (french, women’s writing, and queer theory) because i deserve a break after winter quarter kicked my ass and two of them are with professors i have intellectual crushes and also regular crushes on so… it should be fun.
    my current english professor told me i should consider taking a graduate seminar next year (as an undergrad!!) and that she’d advocate for me to the department if she thought my writing was up to par and then i turned in probably the worst paper i’ve ever written because i was such a mess this quarter. UGH. it’s not at all representative of my abilities and i feel bad, fam. i have her again next quarter and i invited her to my research conference, though, so maybe i can salvage my reputation. pray for me.
    i’ve been wanting overalls FOREVER and they’re so hard to fit properly with a long torso but i finally found the cutest pair of khaki green ones. i’m very happy.
    it’s st paddy’s day! do you need more rachel in your life? of course you do: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GTVIRmQaLeU Sláinte!

    In more serious spring break news, I think I’m going to come out to my mother when I go home next week. AH. I don’t like feeling like I have this big secret hovering over me and since I’m rather out to a lot of friends I’d rather she hear it from me than from someone else by accident. I’m not worried about backlash or getting kicked out or anything but it’s still scary. Oof. I’ll probably chicken out and not do it but I’m really going to try.

    • 2

      Good luck with coming out! I want to, but I’m not ready yet. You COULD send her an email?? Send/bake her a cake that reads “I’m a giant Homo” in frosting.
      Maybe text her RIGHT NOW saying you have something SUUUUPER important to tell her, but you want to do it in person. That will be hard to get out of. She’ll be prepped and it’ll be hard to back out.
      Sit down with a friend for support and put your mom on speaker phone. Have your friend with you to keep you accountable.
      Do it in the car so no one can walk away.
      Good LUCK!!!!

  30. 4

    I wish there was a hugs button cos some ppl I didn’t thumbs up was cos it was sad & I didn’t want to thumbs up the situation. Oh well I’ll prob be back tomorrow night to offer sympathy/empathy.
    Happy belated St. Patrick’s day.
    Wild things
    1 I’m writing a poetry collection for class and rather than playing it safe, I’m writing about wild times from my life. I did ask my tutor if there were any ratings we had to stick to. She said ‘just don’t swear for the fuck of it’ and to go where it needed to. And it’s a queer collection without that being the only topic. The only taming it down I really do is that it’s in third person, renames important characters and is set in a fictional town. It’s an introspective process.
    2 I went to my new dr. She’s happy with me reducing my meds 🙂 in fact she suggested it which is good as I didn’t want to without her say so but I’m in a far healthier state mentally than I was when I went on them. She even understands that I feel content but feel daily going out and talking to ppl/job interviews etc would still stress me out too much.
    Other thing. This week seems to have been my Brendan behan week. I’ve read a biography and am re-reading Borstal Boy and watched it as a movie last night. The biography put an interesting queer theory slant on it, that’s something I didn’t pick up on last time I read Borstal Boy which was a while ago. It’s influencing my re-read. The film is gay but that results in it using the ‘kill your gays’ trope 🙁

    • 2

      Fuck that. Also I wish that there was a way of creating a ‘restricted mode’ on the trolls bloody comments they have which are all sorts of bigoted because I’m fed up reading them on LGBT, women’s and POC videos.

      I don’t know about the others because I’ve not watched them before but Rowan Ellis is definitely family friendly and you actually learn things from watching her. So it’s definitely targeting people just for being LGBT and talking about it. She doesn’t talk about sex that I’ve heard, just being LGBT.

      It isn’t a default, I don’t have a YouTube account and I watch LGBT stuff all the time on there, but that doesn’t make it not bad. Think of the kids for eg who are growing up in an unsupportive family where this might be the only positive representation they get of people who have their own identity. Or just straight/cis kids being brainwashed by their parents who might be given a more open viewpoint by seeing such content.

  31. 4

    It’s been an intense week of learning and loving and growing!!!! I have so much to process and work on in my life and like research and read. It’s so exciting! It’s so exciting to reconnect with my passion for community work and supporting/showing up for people. and like love is a powerful fucking thing! like just the love and intimacy between pals, classmates, collaborators, it blows me away! gosh <3

  32. 5

    I just had my spring break last week, and had top surgery actually. It was a wild week in Charlotte of my best friend caring for me while I was passed out half the time, and the two of us watching Friends and A League of Their Own and Kiss Me when I was somewhat conscious.

  33. 2

    No spring break for the UK (until Easter, because we’re weird and christonormative like that) so it’s been just a normal week at work, and just a normal floating mass of free-form anxieties out of work.

    The big thing for me is that I’m in the middle of buying a narrowboat. I discovered 2 days ago that they’re planning to start building a railway depot opposite my mooring so that’s kinda 🙁 and I’m caught in a loop of ‘I don’t wanna live opposite a major construction project’ and ‘I don’t wanna be the kind of NIMBY I see the baby boomers being’ and ‘but dammit I want this boat so damn much’.

    (seriously. The boat is very very cool.)

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