FRIDAY OPEN THREAD: Dream On, Dream Weaver

tea party (just image)

image by rory midhani

Hello baby belugas and welcome to Friday Open Thread, where we find our legal guardians in the deep blue sea and swim so wild and swim so free.

This week we’re gonna talk about dreams. Because dreams are weird and interesting or sometimes not at all.

dreaming dog gif

Like last night I dreamed that my office at work was like three times as big and there was a whole first floor with a nice, fancy, full kitchen that we’d never discovered before and so many outlets and a projector and it was a Christmas miracle. Then I woke up and thought, Wow, that was a really disappointing dream. Because there is nothing I dislike more than dreaming about work before I have to go to work. And we do not have a kitchen or a projector or ample outlets.

sloth yawn gif

I dream vividly almost every night, but like most people I can often only remember my dreams right after I wake up. Sometimes, if I’m having a super fantastic dream and don’t want it to end, I have been able to allow myself to reenter it if I go back to sleep right away. Once, I dreamed that my partner broke up with me and I woke up bawling and he was like, “What’s wrong?” and I was like, “You broke up with me!” and then I was irrationally mad at him for about an hour.

bunny flop gif

According to scientists, psychologist, and hippies, dreams deal with our subconscious thoughts. There are different theories on why we dream. Some say it’s just a neurological response and we shouldn’t read too much into it. Some think it is a way to work through our fears and desires. Some say it’s like defragging a hard drive — it’s a way the brain cleans out clutter to make space. Some say it helps us process of deepest emotions in a safe space. Some say it helps us practice our fight-or-flight response by simulating dangerous situations. Some say it’s just a random thing that happens and it’s our conscious mind that tries to read meaning into it.

cat dreaming

Regardless, dreams are fascinating and often hilarious to explain, because everything that makes sense in a dream makes no sense in real life. Or does it?! I’ve got my dream dictionary right here, so tell me your most recent or weirdest or funniest or sexiest or most embarrassing or most terrifying dream, and I’ll give you the interpretation from the dream experts which I’m pretty sure is scientifically accurate.

Or just tell me what you’re up to this week, how your babies and furbabies are doing, what you are eating, if you got my Raffi reference earlier in the post, etc. Let it all out.

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KaeLyn is a 40-year-old hard femme bisexual dino mom. You can typically find her binge-watching TV, standing somewhere with a mic or a sign in her hand, over-caffeinating herself, or just generally doing too many things at once. She lives in Upstate NY with her spouse, a baby T. rex, a scaredy cat, an elderly betta fish, and two rascally rabbits. You can buy her debut book, Girls Resist! A Guide to Activism, Leadership, and Starting a Revolution if you want to, if you feel like it, if that's a thing that interests you or whatever.

KaeLyn has written 230 articles for us.


  1. Ooh, I always have really vivid dreams! And I dream in color. Sometimes, when I see a color in real life, I think oh I’ve seen that before in my dream last night. While back, I had a dream about pasta trees in a post-apocalyptic world. I also have a lot of falling elevator dreams, even though I don’t have a fear of elevators in real life. Most of my dreams involve actual people and places in my life, so that part isn’t very wild, but they are very real and vivid. I also had a dream a while back that I went to a-camp and then another dream that I hosted an autostraddle meet up and then nobody showed up, and I have dreams of accidentally outing myself, so some of my dreams reflect actual anxieties. And then i have body-anxiety related dreams: my teeth are falling out, or I look old or huge or sick. I also have skiing or mountain climbing dreams which can either be cool or scary – sometimes I’m on a vertical slope and am stuck or out of control. I don’t remember what I dreamt last night, but I remember I didn’t want to wake up because I was in an argument with someone.

    Anyway… This weekend was good – I went hiking in the “Issaquah Alps” near Snoqualmie Pass with my mother. There was lots of smoke in the air though. There have been so many fires in Eastern Washington. :( It’s scary.


    The leaves by the beach are starting to turn! As much as I love the long summer days, I’m really looking forward to fall. And I’m looking forward to the rain; I’ve always found it comforting. And we desperately need it with this drought.

    On a different note: Has anyone tried the Her app? At age 26, I’ve never even been on a date, since it took so long for me to come out and come to terms with my own sexuality. I’ve gradually (slowly) decided that I actually want to start dating and develop a relationship someday. Needless to say, I’m pretty clueless. And to be honest, I’m not very socially connected with a lot of people IRL. From what I’ve read, “Her” sounds pretty good – I like the idea of an app designed specifically for queer women, and I like how it has both social events and dating stuff. But… I FEEL SO AWKWARD AND TERRIFIED and am still not out to many people and I want to push myself but feel totally clueless. Any advice or personal experience or reassurance?


    I am having way too much fun with this. All my fellow science nerds need to download this free “chemoji” app so you can text your friends beakers and smileys with goggles and period tables.

    Also I have my next vacation destination planned: Free Spirit Spheres. Suspended SPHERICAL TREEHOUSES in a rainforest in British Columbia which you can rent overnight. Has anyone been to these? So cool!

    • I’m currently using the “her” app and while I find its purpose confusing (is it a hookup app?), I’ve met this really cool person through it. We’re hanging out again Saturday. We have so much in common and it all started with me just liking her picture. :)

    • I have the HER app! I don’t use it for dating purposes, but I think it is for all of the above: social, dating, hook-ups. It seems pretty cool!

      Your dreams seem pretty straight-forward to interpret. Like, you seem to dream about real anxieties. Is it possible that you feel isolated from queer community but also afraid to put yourself out there in a vulnerable way? For the record, if you went to a-camp for real, it would be so good! Body dreams are fascinating.

      According to my dream diary: “Hiking: To dream that you are hiking represents progress and achievement. With perseverance and strong-will, you will make it far in life.” So that’s good news! Maybe download the HER app.

      • “Is it possible that you feel isolated from queer community but also afraid to put yourself out there in a vulnerable way?” Yes – this is very true. I really don’t have many social connections in general or connections to the queer community. I’ve been to a couple autostraddle meet ups, which are great, but I really would like to push myself to make some more friends.

        Maybe a-camp next year? It’s a hopeful-goal I have… Sounds amazing!

        I love the hiking interpretation! :D

    • I tried it when it was still called dattch(still is for Android users and they promised that early summer will bring the update and name change, but nothing so far). It seems like a pretty cool app, and I dig it is trans woman, & genderqueer inclusive(though language is a bit lesbian centric and maybe a turn off to some, as other have said on here). However, that said when I tried that app, there was a lot of people that came up for me, who either hadn’t been for a while, or couldn’t reply(at least that’s wha their profile said). This is out here in SoCal so I was a bit disappointed to see that there was a lot who haven’t logged on. Your mileage may vary, and I hope it does, cause Her has the potential to be a great app.

      JP, yeah I’ve seen some of the marketing they are doing as like tinder for queer women, but with less of a hook-up and more of less get serious

      • Thanks for the info! That sounds encouraging. I’m in a fairly queer-friendly location (western WA), so hopefully there would be local people!

  2. Lat night I dreamed that I unexpectedly encountered a woman who once, a couple of decades ago, was a good friend and a great source of support in a dark time. In my dream, I excitedly ran up to her and reached out my arms to give her a hug — and because she had heard from someone else that I had come out, she refused and turned away from me, coldly. To be fair to the actual person, I have no good idea how she would react to encountering me or to learning about how identify. But in my dream, it was so, so devastating.

    Oh, friends, I am so tired.

    Last Friday I couldn’t muster the energy for even a half-hearted FOT comment. I realized the next day that I’m having a lupus flare-up, after 18+ months of remission. For me, that means fatigue, pleurisy and general crankiness (that is, more than my usual level of crank).

    And my attention keeps being drawn to all the bad news, both global (more shootings, more Euro-refugees, post-Katrina reflections, more TWOC killings), and more local (the idiot county clerk who STILL won’t issue marriage licenses [because JEEEZUZ], the arrest for refusal-to-sit-down-politely of three local LGBT advocates at a State Fair event).

    That dream didn’t help.

    And my birthday is in two weeks, but I’m not at all sure that I’ll have the energy for any kind of celebration with friends.

    This is all SO frustrating, because it was only a few weeks ago that I felt on-top-of-the-world, healthy and, for practically the first time in my life, happy. On the other hand (it is occurring to me as I type this) that also means that I’m probably not that far away from getting back to happy. I’ve obviously gotten through flare-ups like this before, and I expect I will again this time.

    Wow — Friday Open Thread whining venting just cheered me up. Thanks!

    • I’ve got RA. I hear you on the flare up days, even if we manifest somewhat different body fuckery.

      I send internet high fives (but slowly and gently because my hands hurt today).

    • I’m glad you got it all out. That’s what the FOT is here for! I’m sorry you’re having a flare up and I hope you are through it soon. Hugs.

      I dunno if this sounds like you, but my very scientific dream research says this about being rejected by a loved one:

      “To dream that you are being rejected signifies a lack of self-worth. You feel alienated. Alternatively, the dream means that you are being too agreeable and accommodating, where your own sense of self is lost. You need to be more assertive and learn to say no to others.”

    • Evidently I might have SLE too. Went to the doctor early this month & the blood tests suggest it, or another similar autoimmune disease. Have to wait till December to see a specialist; that’s the earliest they can get me in.

      Wishing you restful sleep w pleasant dreams, and easy breathing. You’ll be fine. <3

  3. Someone ones told me about “lucid dreaming”. This sounded like an amazing opportunity to experience how to fly. So, one night I realised I was dreaming and though “I’m going to fly!”. But I had no idea how that would work, so I ran towards the roof and stood on the edge, ready to fall down so I would have to fly to survive. I stood there for a while and in that time I got unsure whether or not it was actually a dream and started to believe that this was real life and I was about to commit suicide. So I got off the roof and continued my dream, only to wake up realising my missed opportunity. But to be honest I’m pretty sure that if I had jumped, I would have fallen to death and wake up, because that sounds much more like my imagination.

    • I have lucid dreamed! It’s wild! I’ve heard about flying or astral projecting–whatever you want to call it. There have been a couple times where I’ve had sleep paralysis and I’ve tried to move and it felt like I was lifting out of my body. Which honestly was kind of terrifying. But yeah, it sounds like it could be so cool to fly. But maybe also terrifying.

      FTR, are you sure you aren’t still dreaming? I mean, how would you know?

    • Ooh, cool. I’ve only had halfway lucid dreams, where I have some idea that I’m dreaming, but not quite lucid enough to control them.

      KaeLyn, I’ve also had sleep paralysis a couple times, and I agree that it was scary. It felt like some sort of impending nightmare, but for a few seconds I couldn’t move.

  4. I love your photo choices KaeLyn!

    Hmmmm..I may be about to induce trauma with my dream memories. I had at one point a whole spate of weird baby dreams..for instance, I had a baby, but it was a croissant. I was looking at it, getting soooo hungry, wondering what to do. Then I thought, “I know, I’ll tear off the end. Those are it’s legs, and they’ll grow back!” Which is sadly true of neither babies nor croissants, as far as I know.

    Dreams. They make so much sense.

    I’m now prepared for this FOT to get extremely weird.

    • I could have used pics of my partner sleeping instead of cute animals, but this was much less creepy and cuter to a more general audience.

      Here’s your dream dictionary keyword. I wish croissants regrew their legs. What a world that would be.

      Cannibalism: To see cannibalism in your dream symbolizes a destructive and forbidden desire or obsession. Metaphorically, cannibals consume people’s lives, along with their energy. Thus, this dream may then denote an aspect of your life (career, relationship, children, etc ), which is consistently draining your enthusiasm and vitality.

      Baby: To see a baby in your dream signifies innocence, warmth and new beginnings. Babies symbolize something in your own inner nature that is pure, vulnerable, helpless and/or uncorrupted. If you dream that the baby is smiling at you, then it suggests that you are experiencing pure joy. You do not ask for much to make you happy… The dream may serve as a reminder that it is time for you to pick up that old interest, hobby, or project again. If you dream that you are on your way to the hospital to have a baby, then it signifies your issues of dependency and your desires to be completely care for. Perhaps you are trying to get out of some responsibility… Seeing an evil baby or a demon baby in your dream implies that you are apprehensive or afraid of a new project that you are undertaking. You may be taking on more than you can handle.

      Croissant: To dream that you are eating a croissant indicates that you are lacking some affection or love in your life. There is a void waiting to be filled.

      OK. Well, does that help? LOL.

      • Haha omg it might be truer than you think. I’m pretty sure I had these dreams before I realized I was queer. Soooo…I was lacking affection, destructively suppressing my desires, but just beginning to be ready for my new beginning! With growth potential?!

        I feel as though I should be sending you yummy croissants as a thank you. Your incredible efforts this FOT are noted, acknowledged and appreciated!

  5. I dream a lot. Quite vivid and usually ridiculous. One of my main indicators that I’m under too much stress is nightmares where people try to kill me and my loved ones.
    But recently I’ve been quite well in life so last night I dreamt that i was watching England v Wales at the millenium stadium, but it was a training match for the rugby world cup. I couldn’t find a hair bobble so i asked my auntie who was sitting a few rows away with David and Victoria Beckham and my scout leader.

    Top notch dream for me, minimum anxiety, great times.

    • As for stress dreams I did actually have a little one last night that i cant remember which caused me to kick my person in bed. Whoops…

      My fav stress dream to tell other people is from when I was five and my parents were arguing in the house and my mum threw my dad out into the baying crowds in our street. They stripped him naked and crucified him all while me and brother and sister were pleading my mum to let him back in. Suppose it must have been Christianity week at school

    • Sports: To dream that you are watching a sports competition represents two opposing viewpoints or conflicting opinions. To play or watch extreme sports in your dream suggests that you may be pushing yourself too hard. You need to consider the risks involved and if it is still worth it to pursue further.

      Stadium: To see or dream that you are in a stadium represents your determination to succeed and achieve your goals. You need to be more active, aggressive, and bold.

      Borrow: To dream that you are borrowing something suggests that you need to let go of your pride. It is okay to ask for help and lean on the support of friends and family. Alternatively, the dream indicates that you need to incorporate a certain quality into your own life that you are not utilizing currently.

      Bobby Pin: (closest I could find to hair tie) To see or use a bobby pin your dream represents your need for order and neatness. Everything needs to be in placed. You are feeling insecure about something.

      I DON’T KNOW. Or you were just watching a game with the Beckham’s and your auntie. Don’t believe everything you read in a dream dictionary.

  6. As a kid I could continue dreams whenever I wanted (usually the following night), but now I’m a grown up I’m lucky if I can remember dreams even an hour after I wake up… :C

    Anywho, while not overly exciting, this week I planted a cutting from one of my Mum’s old plants that seems to be dying off. While my little cutting was on the main plant it was all wilted and grim like the rest of it, but since I cut and replanted it it seems to be thriving — it did a new leaf and everything! I’m not exactly green thumbed though, so we’ll just have to wait and see how it goes.

    I also decided to treat myself to this majestic Bayonetta tee!

    I’ve wanted it for ages but I always feel guilty buying myself so I’d been putting it off. Just this once I managed to stifle the guilt in favour of the awesome! ;)

    As for the dogs, they’re both doing great at the mo’.
    It’s Moggy’s 8th birthday in two weeks and four days, so I’m planning on ordering her a dog safe birthday cake. I know 8 isn’t exactly a big deal for most dogs, but we’ve known since she was a pup that she’d be lucky to make it to 5, so every year is kind of a Big Deal for her now!

    • <3 the new tee! It looks perfect!

      Happy birthday to Moggy. I hope she enjoys her doggie cake and everyone pets her a lot and she is very happy. Even if she doesn’t know what a birthday is, I’m sure she’ll appreciate the love and the cake.

      • Thank you! c:

        I’m sure she will. Extra food is always cause for major excitement on her part, haha!

  7. I got approved for a student loan now my whole year is paid and I dont have to worry like previous years yay!!!!!

  8. I rarely remember my dreams, but there’s this one that always stands out to me. When I was in college there was a string of bomb threats on campus that led to classes being cancelled and it got to be sort of a joke because everyone assumed it was just some asshole trying to cause chaos, but it was shortly after the shooting at Virginia Tech and all of my teacher training courses had a “lockdown procedures” aspect to them, so I was a little on edge. One day I was sitting in class and the fire alarm came on along with an announcement to evacuate the building because there was a bomb threat. It ended up being nothing, but it’s hard to be that rational in the moment and the entire class had to be evacuated and escorted to another building to be interviewed by police and was definitely an incredibly upsetting moment of my life.

    ANYWAY, so young me is really upset over all these bomb threats and one night I dreamed that I was sitting in the students center when my phone went off saying to evacuate immediately, so I had to fight through crowds of people to get outside. Once I got there, Lord Voldemort is standing on the amphitheater type steps outside shouting unforgivable curses at everyone and declaring he had sent in the bomb threats through his blackberry. And it turned out in dream land, it was Voldemort and his blackberry who disrupted all those classes my sophomore year.

    Still to this day, that is my most vivid/strangest dream ever.

    (Also, still to this day unsure when I’m supposed to write “dreamed” or “dreamt”)

    • Oh my. Voldemort had a Blackberry all this time.

      This makes a lot of sense, actually.

      Voldermort is not in my dream dictionary, sorry. LOL!

      Both “dreamed” and “dreamt” are correct. “Dreamt’ is more common in British English than in American English, but “dreamed” is more common overall. Go with your heart.

  9. I had this recurring dream/nightmare when I was a little kid, at least three times a week between the ages of five to seven. The minutiae changed frequently, but there were certain things which always stayed the same.

    I was leaving my house to go to school, little 5-7 year old me, and everything–EVERYTHING–was red. Not just the objects around me, but the sky, the grass, the street, the very air. Like I was wearing glasses that had red lenses in them, looking through a red filter. There was always a convertible with the top down parked across the street.

    As I’m walking to school (I never walked to school in real life and in fact in this dream I walked the opposite way from where my bus stop was), I begin to notice there are monsters lurking everywhere. I never really see any of them, but I can feel them watching me, or I’ll see their eyes in the bushes (the red, red bushes). I become less concerned with getting to school and more concerned with not getting eaten. I am running as fast as my little legs can carry me, even though nothing is really chasing me–it’s just that I am literally surrounded by monsters everywhere in this crimson world.

    Then I actually see one. It is a werewolf, which is strange because even though the sky is red it is still day time and werewolves are only supposed to come out during the full moon. Apparently horror-movie lore doesn’t exist in my red world. And this werewolf is now actually chasing me, so I run. I jump into the convertible (despite the fact that I walked far, far from this vehicle by now, it is still there just down the street from me, empty, at all times) and now I have to figure out how to drive it to get away from this red werewolf that is after me.

    Sometimes I get the car started and get going, but usually I wake up at this point, eerily calm considering I just dreamed I was about to die (and I was seven).

    I had this dream so frequently that I still remember it vividly, twenty years later. Conversely, I almost never remember my dreams now. The only thing I remember about last night/this morning’s dream was that I was driving to school, or through the school parking lot, with a group of “popular girl” acquaintances, but they all looked like my ex-best friend–blonde hair and blue eyes, despite the fact that these were not their actual features. And then suddenly the driver got pissed off and started doing donuts and we got in trouble by the staff for ruining a school vehicle (which was somehow integral to the feminist movement???), despite the fact that it was the driver’s car which she had driven to my house and picked me up in. …oh, and also there was something to do with Hogwarts houses and Milificent was the matriarch of the Black family. IDEK, I really wish I could remember more than pieces of this one because it sounds so gloriously bizarre.

    • WOAH. That’s a lot for a seven year old. Have you ever had someone interpret it for you? There’s a lot there! From your seven year old brain!

      Red: Red is an indication of raw energy, force, vigor, intense passion, aggression, power, courage, impulsiveness and passion.�The color red has deep emotional and spiritual connotations. Consider the phrase “seeing red” to denote anger. Alternatively, the color red in your dream indicates a lack of energy. You are feeling tired or lethargic. Red is also the color of danger, violence, blood, shame, rejection, sexual impulses and urges. Perhaps you need to stop and think about your actions.

      Being Chased: Being chased in your dream is one of several common dream theme stemming from feelings of anxiety in your waking life. To dream that you are being chased is an indication that you are avoiding some issues in your waking life. The actions in your dream exemplify how you respond to pressure and cope with fears, stress or various situations. Instead of confronting the situation, you have a tendency to run away and avoid issues that you are uncomfortable with addressing…. If someone is chasing you in your dream, then it may also refer to your close-mindedness. You are refusing to acknowledge a certain viewpoint or idea and don’t even want to give a listen to any opinion that is different from yours. Another way to analyze your chase dream is how the pursuer or attacker may be an aspect of your own Self. Perhaps you are suppressing or rejecting certain feelings or certain characteristics of your Self. Anger, jealousy, fear, and even love can manifest as a threatening figure in your dream. And you could be projecting these feelings onto the unknown chaser.

      Car: To dream that you are driving a car denotes your ambition, your drive and your ability to navigate from one stage of your life to another. Consider how smooth or rough the car ride is. Overall, this dream symbol is an indication of your dependence and degree of control you have on your life.

      P.S. Milificent as the matriarch of the Black family. Someone write that fanfic.

  10. I have been dreaming (and remembering them) very often lately. Last week I dreamt I was pregnant and giving birth, and it all happened so quickly that it ended up being at home on a towel in the living room. The weirdest part is even now, after essentially a week since this happened, I can still remember the feeling of the baby crowning, like I can imagine it because of the dream. Mind you, I’ve never given birth or been pregnant or even tried to be, nothing along those lines.

    • Oof. That’s really interesting. And possibly painful?

      Pregnant: To dream that you are pregnant symbolizes an aspect of yourself or some aspect of your personal life that is growing and developing. You may not be ready to talk about it or act on it. Being pregnant in your dream may also represent the birth of a new idea, direction, project or goal.

      Birth: To dream of giving birth or see someone else giving birth suggests that you are giving birth to a new idea or project. It also represents a new attitude, fresh beginnings or a major event. Alternatively, the dream may be calling attention to your inner child and the potential for you to grow.

  11. I’ve been having a lot of sex dreams lately. Mostly involving people from the internet that I’ve never met in person before. Is this weird?

    Also it’s been 5 years today that I moved away from my hometown and “came out,” and I am just starting to feel really good and really comfortable in who I am for maybe the first time ever! It got better, tbh.

    • Yay on life being good and feeling comfortable in your skin!

      I don’t think there’s anything weird about sex dreams. Sex dreams are mostly great!

      There’s a lot of stuff about sex dreams in this dream dictionary. It’s apparently a really typical dream fantasy (imagine that). Maybe this applies?

      Sex: To dream that you are having sex with a friend refers to the closeness you share with your friend. Because you two share so much between each other and know so much about each other, the dreaming mind may depict this closeness and bond as sex. Alternatively, such a dream indicates a level of attraction between you and your friend, but you are too afraid to act on it. Thus your desires are manifested in a dream. If you dream that you are having sex with a stranger, then it represents uncertainty about what is ahead. Alternatively, the dream allows you to experiment freely without having any hang ups, emotional baggage or preconceived notions associated with a person you would know. In such a scenario, you are able to let loose and express your desires, passions and emotions.

      Or maybe a sex dream is just a sex dream. Enjoy it! ;)

  12. There’s one particularly vivid dream I remember from high school, in which my totally platonic best friend threw me down on a bed in a totally hot way and we made out. I was REALLY WEIRDED OUT by this dream, and I spent the week avoiding my bestie in the most casual way possible until I got over it. I have since told her about this dream and we had some good laughs about it.

    Life is so busy right now. I’m getting ready to go to Dragon Con next week! I’m so excited. I’m hoping I will get some good photos.

    • DRAGON CON. Yes to pics, please.

      And actually according to the dream diary, a sex dream about a friend can mean you want to bone. Or that you just feel super close to them and happy about them and your brain makes that into sexy times to represent your bond. (See what I posted for Suzy, above).

      Whichever way it goes, I’m glad you can laugh about it!

  13. My week went pretty well. I got my classroom set up, and am eagerly anticipating the first day of school on Wednesday.
    If y’all would help, I would like a little advice! I’m considering getting my first fur baby, and can’t decide who I should adopt. I grew up with dogs but am neither quite in the lifestyle to let a dog out whenever it needs, nor is my apartment big enough. So the question becomes if I should get a cat, rabbit, or something even smaller that will be caged 24/7? I would probably find a hamster endlessly amusing, it would probably find itself in a ball most nights, free to roam my apartment at will, same with a rabbit. (Only a rabbit wouldn’t go in a ball, obviously. That strikes me as a bad idea.)

    • OK, so I have many thoughts! I have had rabbits, cats, guinea pigs, and rats. As a kid, I also had hamsters and my family had dogs. Rabbits are amazing, but they are a lot of work. And like most small animals, they do better in pairs, so if you want one, get a bonded pair. They will destroy your apartment if you don’t spend time playing with them because they dig, chew, and are generally adorable trouble-makers. They need exercise every day, so you will have to rabbit-proof their exercise area. They are amazing, but they are a ton of work.

      Honestly, it sounds like you might be better off with a pair of bonded rats. They can live in a nice big cage most of the time and they are amazingly social. They love human affection and you can take them out for play time and they are great little friends.

      In general, don’t put small animals in balls. It’s bad for their little backs and they prefer to explore the world with their noses and mouths. But you can make them fun playpen areas that are safe!

      I’m a little bit too into small animals, so if you have any thoughts or questions, hit me up! I vote for a ratty pair if you want good friends who will want to hang out with you and ride on your shoulder and generally be into human contact.

      Guinea pigs are also great and very amusing to live with, but are less interested in constant human affection. But if you decide to adopt a pair of piggies, I have lots of resources for you! They are the sweetest. (Also do not put them in balls, like never ever with guinea pigs)


      • This was hugely helpful! Thank you! I had been sort of considering rats, but will definitely take a more serious look at them now. This was exactly the type of thing I was looking for! Seriously, thanks!

        • YAY RATS! RATS ARE THE BEST. Because they are little, they can get plenty of exercise in a nice big cage. I would send you one of my used ones, @sarah-kate, but I have a feeling it would cost less to get a new one where you are. Get one of the multi-tiered one (like this: Or if you are handy, which I am not, you can make a cool one yourself. They need lots of toys and things because they’re super smart. BUT YOU CAN ALSO TEACH THEM TRICKS BECAUSE THEY ARE SUPER SMART.

          They eat rat block, mostly. Avoid the packaged foods with all the treats and seeds mixed in. Rat block is the most nutritious. And fresh veggies. Because they are little garbage disposals aka scavengers, they can also eat pretty much anything if you want to share your food with them, including small amounts of meat and even dark chocolate.

          THEY ARE SO MUCH THE BEST FOREVER. I hope you find some cuties to bring home. Keep me updated.

          • I was reading Sarah’s post and thinking, ‘rats would be ideal for you’ – so good to see your response, Kaelyn! They are such fascinating and entertaining companions, and perfect when you don’t have much space. The only thing to be mindful of is that they are prone to respiratory conditions – but I’m sure you’ll find lots of info on this online, Sarah :) I wish I weren’t in another country – I currently have the most adorable baby rats from a rescued rat and they need homes!

    • *disclaimer, I am a cat person*
      I vote cat! They are affectionate and self-sufficient and clean and wonderful. I like dogs too, but for my apartment life, a cat works best. Some people think that cats are less affectionate or more aloof than dogs, but I disagree. My cat chases after me like a puppy and sleeps on my bed every night and comes running up and purring every time I walk in the door. And at the same time, they’re independent enough that they’re easy to care for. I recommend adopting an adult. Kittens are cute, but adults require less training and you have a better idea what their personality is like, plus they aren’t as readily adopted, so there are more in need of homes.

      I can’t comment on small animals like rats or hamsters, as I’ve had no experience with them.

  14. Most recent dream! I dreamed that my girlfriends dog (who is super awesome and cuddly) was this crazy huge dog, like the size of a cow, and we were walking in the woods when this crazy huge animals came and attacked us. Her dog was able to fight it off and we started running. All of a sudden my girlfriend is in the dream and I started freaking out about how hurt her dog is. Then suddenly my dream jumps to her house, and my dog (a dachshund who is as bratty as she is cute) starts peeing in every corner of the house like a boy dog. Then I woke up #wtf

    • OK….well….hmmm……

      Here we go:

      Dog: To see a dog in your dream symbolizes intuition, loyalty, generosity, protection, and fidelity. The dream suggests that your strong values and good intentions will enable you to go forward in the world and bring you success. The dream dog may also represent someone in your life who exhibits these qualities. Alternatively, to see a dog in your dream indicates a skill that you may have ignored or forgotten. If the dog is vicious and/or growling, then it indicates some inner conflict within yourself. It may also indicate betrayal and untrustworthiness. Also consider common notions associated with the word dog, such as loyalty (“man’s best friend”) and to be “treated like a dog”.

      Animals: To see animals in your dream represent your own physical characteristic, primitive desires, and sexual nature, depending on the qualities of the particular animal. Animals symbolize the untamed and uncivilized aspects of yourself. Thus, to dream that you are fighting with an animal signifies a hidden part of yourself that you are trying to reject and push back into your subconscious.

      Dreaming of animals being abused indicates that your own primal desires are being suppressed. You are unable to fully express an important part of who you are. Alternatively, the dream represents your helplessness in a situation.

      Urination: To see urine in your dream represents the feelings you have rejected. Alternatively, the dream may be a pun on your “pissy” attitude.

      Hahaha. Ok, I don’t think any of that was helpful. Maybe it’s just your brain sorting things out. Or maybe it’s about uncertainty and nervousness about some thing or person that manifested as the huge animals that attacked you.

  15. So, this is kind of embarrassing/sexy dream I had. I think I was like 26-27 at the time. I don’t remember if I went to sleep inebriated, or if I drank tea that helped one dream or not, but it felt pretty damn real. All I can really remember is I was making out with this woman, I think she had long hair, but next thing I know she start to take my clothes off, but it’s a different me. Like I am post op, and when topless I am b cupped, with noticeable areolas. She’s slowly goes down on me and it feels great. She slowly builds it up until I am close and then with a surprise she pokes me in the back with two fingers(may have been one), and wave of joy comes over me as I experience a total body orgasm. I wake up once the orgasm is over to find myself breathless, confused, and in need of a shower from the sweat & mess that was made. I chalked it up to being told I’m a pervert and fetishist; but, it wasn’t until a while later I realized I am trans & those are valid feelings of trans/dysphoria I am having. This is just one example of the past that points to me being trans queer.

    How has your week been? Mine has been full of heat and sweat. Sunday I helped a fellow straddler and friend put stuff into a movie van. Got to play with her cat & dog. Yay. Fortunately it wasn’t too hot as the past 3 days it’s been almost 100 at work. I’m sweating like a turkey at thanksgiving as I type this. I’d rather be at the beach with a cold tea drink in a cute bra basking in the sun. Maybe I’ll do that by myself on Sunday. Find a secluded beach and relax.
    Also, earlier in the week I became friends with this lovely queer woman. Sadly she lives in another state, but she’s just a total dream boat, and very friendly. Plus, she’s sent me videos of her cats and they are soo adorable.

    I’ll leave you with a little modern poetry.

    You see you wouldn't ask why The rose that grew from the concrete had damaged petals. On the contrary, we would all celebrate its tenacity. We would all love it's will to reach the sun. Well, we are the rose – this is the concrete – and these are my damaged petals. Don't ask me why, thank God ni**a, ask me how!

    Thank you for viewing and reading my post.

    • Thanks for sharing this, Al! I’m not going to offer dream interpretation because it seems pretty clear! :)

  16. hello my BABY hello my DARLING hello my RAGTIME GAL.

    I am sweaty because I have been carrying boxes of wine and chairs and my family is being 1/2 shit show 1/2 awesome, and every single day this week has been either me crying or my girlfriend crying because EMOTIONS ARE HIGH because we are getting married tomorrow, hold onto your butts, I am hiding our rings in a bag of pinto beans because girlfriend is convinced they will get stolen, and this week I dreamed that I was good at math, specifically geometry, which is the only kind of math I ever got a B in. made me want to try to be good at math again.

    Like I am not a STEM person at all, but STEM lesbians make me want to be good at those things because I love joining clubs with niche interests of awesome queer babes (in the like nonobjectfying, you’re great sense, unless you’re comfortable with being objectified in which case, get a load of you hot stuff)

    Weddings! It is like an endless game of schlepping! Never will I be finished carrying things! but our friend dropped off the flowers she’s giving us and it is a field of dahlias I want to frolic amongst them.

    • OMG CONGRATS! Your biceps are going to look so boss on your wedding day from all that lifting!

      Math: To dream about mathematics indicate that you are evaluating a situation in your waking life where you need to be more rational in your thinking.

      Wedding logistics, perhaps? Sounds like you are rocking them, even in your dreams!

      • I am not the logistic-er, I am the carrier of heavy things and the maker of lunch, it is sort of a relief near the very end to be like “this is my thing but I did not really plan this thing I had some very crucial elements I was involved with but like ultimately, it is very freeing to me not to be the logistics babe. but, that’s interesting.

        but like broadly, I am lately into not identifying as smart or rational bc I have lots of other qualities and I grew up in super a hyper intellectualized way, and I am really savoring emphasizing other ways of presenting myself.

  17. I sleep deeply and often remember my dreams, especially in summer because I dream more if I get too warm at night for some reason! I do generally enjoy having vivid dreams as long as they’re nice dreams of course.

    Really came here just to say that I asked someone out on a proper date for the first time ever and it’s tomorrow and I’m excited!

  18. Well good evening folks. Dreams, they’re weird. I had this recurring one as a very little kid that all my adult female relations turned into witches…like green warty ones…and we were on a golf course where there was this little hut with a buffet and I was scared because I couldn’t find my family and every time I found them they’d be a witch…like I said…weird. I have no recent ones because my sleep has been massively disturbed due to late nights and early mornings, dog vomit, stress, and neighbour noises.

    So this week I watched way more carmilla than is probably healthy. But it’s a rabbit hole you led me down Autostraddle and now I’m staying there, eating the cookies and drinking the “soy milk”. I’m also 1200 words away from being done with my MA, I’d be closer if I hadn’t been sucked into Creampuffdom…

    • Woooo! So close to being done with school!

      I love these weird little kid recurring dreams.

      Witch: To see a witch in your dream represents evil and destruction. It may point to your negative ideas of anything feminine and your experiences with dangerous or heartless women. Alternatively, a witch may be a symbol of goodness, power and enchantment depending on your feeling toward your dream witch.

      Hut: To see or live in a hut in your dream represents the basic necessities and comforts. You need to simplify your life and get back to the bare basics. Accept what you already have and know that that is enough.

      Lost: To dream that you are lost suggests that you have lost your direction in life or that you have lost sight of your goals. You may be feeling worried and insecure about the path you are taking in life. If you try to call for help, then it means that you are trying to reach out for support. You are looking for someone to lean on. Alternatively, being lost means that you are still adjusting to a new situation in which the rules and conditions are ever changing. To dream that someone else is lost represents some unresolved issues or feelings pertaining to the person that is lost. Consider what aspect of that person you may have lost within your own self. Perhaps you need to recapture and re-acknowledge those aspects.

      Food: To see food in your dream represents physical and emotional nourishment and energies. The different types of food can symbolize a wide range of things. Generally, fruit is symbolic of sensuality, meat represents animalistic desires, and vegetables pertain to healthy pursuits. Frozen foods may refer to your cold emotions and frigid ways. Eating certain foods also refer to qualities that you need to incorporate within your own self. To see fake or plastic food in your dream implies that you are not getting the emotional support that you are looking for. You are feeling emotionally unsatisfied.

      So, in summary, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

      • Weirdly I guess that makes sense to where my tiny 6/7 year old brain was. I was a tiny butch gay even then, all boys clothes and girl chasing, and was pretty scared by that, because I was in a hyper feminine environment with both my parents jobs and my all girls school. So yeah. I wasn’t eating the food and I couldn’t get into the hut because of the witches. I guess it was my first gay nightmare! Thanks KaeLyn!

  19. My most recent dream was a very middle-school thing in which my best friend completely ignored me and shut me out at a lunch table. No fun, and it seemed to go on forever.

    My most memorable dream ever was one in which I gave birth to a human infant in one of the bathrooms of the academic building where I worked in college. It was very, very vivid and painful and confusing.

    This is my first Friday Open Thread opportunity from my new Midwestern home, so I’ll put up a batsignal for folks in Iowa or nearby parts of Minnesota/Wisconsin/Illinois. Help me make friends! Or just tell me what’s fun to do around here!

    • Welcome to your new home! The midwest is where it’s at, or so I hear.

      As @snaelle and I were discussing earlier, birth can represent “giving birth to a new idea or project. It also represents a new attitude, fresh beginnings or a major event. Alternatively, the dream may be calling attention to your inner child and the potential for you to grow. If you dream that you are giving birth to twins, then it represents conflicting ideas. A more direct interpretation of this dream may represent your desires/ anxieties of giving birth or the anticipation for such an event to occur. To dream that you are giving birth prematurely implies that you have revealed or turned in a project that was incomplete. You feel unready or unprepared about a new endeavor.”

      Bathroom: To dream that you are in the bathroom relates to your instinctual urges. You may be experiencing some burdens/feelings and need to “relieve yourself”. Alternatively, a bathroom symbolizes purification and self-renewal. You need to cleanse yourself, both emotionally and psychologically. To dream that you can not find the bathroom or that you have difficulties finding one indicates that you have difficulties in releasing and expressing your emotions. You are holding back your true feelings about something. To dream that you are in a public restroom with no stalls or that there are a lot of people around while you are trying to do your business signifies your frustrations about getting enough privacy. You are always putting others ahead of your own needs. As a result, you are lacking a sense of personal space. Alternatively, the dream indicates that you are having difficulties letting go of old emotions. You are afraid that if you reveal these feelings, then others around you will judge and criticize you. If you dream that you are in a bathroom meant for the opposite sex, then it suggests that you are overstepping your boundaries.You have crossed the line in some situation.

      Job: To dream about your current job suggests that you need to work harder or be more effective at work. There may be something or some task that must be done at once. Or the dream may mean you are overworked or preoccupied with work. You need to make time for leisure and relaxation. If you dream that you are still working at your old job, then it suggests that there is an old lesson that you need to learn and apply to a current situation. It may also mean that you are regressing into your comfort zone.

      College: To dream that you are in college indicates that you are going through some social or cultural changes. You want to expand your knowledge and awareness. It also suggests that now is a good time for you to experiment and try new things. If you had gone to college in your past, then also consider your personal experiences and memories of your college days. However, if you are currently in college, then it may be a reflection of your current surroundings. Alternatively, the dream suggests that you will achieve your goals through perseverance and hard work. You may be going through a period of stress in your life.

      Helpful? I dunno! But that’s what the dream dictionary says. Or maybe it was a premonition and this is going to be your future. I hope not.

    • I’ve had giving-birth dreams and pregnant dreams too, even though I don’t want kids. They were rather unnerving dreams for me. I wondered if it was my biological clock sending me a message, but it was probably more metaphorical.

      Welcome to FOT!

      • @eunoia : I went through basically every possible kind of pregnant/giving birth dream between the ages of about 18 and 24. Since I was in school for most of those years, the stuff @kaelynrich quotes about new projects, the inner child, etc., makes some sense.

        I also realized when I was 18 that physically being pregnant was the MOST terrifying thing I could imagine happening to me, so it’s possible that it’s just the way my dreaming brain deals with all feelings of fear/terror/uneasiness.

        You are welcome to borrow either of those rationalizations if they’re helpful! Once I decided that “terrifying birth dream” = “I am having anxious feelings about literally anything”, they subsided a bit.

  20. I recently dreamed that a person I am romantically involved with in a semi complicated fashion asked me for advice on how to fuck their girlfriend and that I was trying to figure out how to mail them a dildo (mail struggles feature in many of my dreams, and also in my real life because we don’t have actual addresses in Central America lol, mine is “1/2 a block east of the BW hamburger restaurant, orange house on the right”).

    And then when I told them about it in my waking life they were like “oh btw I actually do have another partner”

    and then I fell down and have not entirely gotten up but #ITSFINE.

    I don’t really need you to interpret this dream KaeLyn bc it seems pretty obvious but I want you to know I think you are the literal greatest.


      1st theory: You are psychic. Always a possibility.

      Dream dictionary says:

      Sex: To dream about sex refers to the integration and merging of contrasting aspects of yourself. It represents psychological completion. The sex act parallels aspects of yourself that you wish to express. A more direct interpretation of the dream, may be your libido’s way of telling you that it has been too long since you have had sex. It may indicate repressed sexual desires and your needs for physical and emotional love. To see others having sex in your dream refers to your own desires of being more adventurous in your own sex life.

      Dildo: To see or use a dildo in your dream suggests that you are feeling unsatisfied in some area of your life, which may or may not relate to sex. There is a void in your life. Alternatively, the dream indicates your desires for a more gratifying sex life. To wear a strap-on dildo in your dream refers to your unexpressed masculine energy. (Uh, WTF dream dictionary. Gross. Sometimes a dildo is just a dildo.)

      Advice: To dream that you are giving advice indicates that you have the knowledge and information to help others.

      Package: To see a package in your dream represents hidden creative energy, skills, and/or feelings. If you are giving or sending a package, then it suggests that you are projecting your feelings onto another instead of dealing with them.

      OK, I don’t know. Did it just get weird?

      • LOL. My life is a joke, everything is beautiful, thank lesbian jesus for Cat Power’s The Greatest.

  21. Hello Straddleverse!! How are the world’s greatest Straddlrs? =D My week has been going by okay, I guess. I binged watched yesterday on Game of Thrones. The 4th season and 2 episodes of season 5 in a day. WOW. Never again. Hahaha!

    But what about your hair? Isn’t it still great? Where are all your furbabies? And if you have real babies? What’s cold like where you are? LA is being a hot mess right now. My mom and I have ended up sleeping in the living room at 3am with the door open and all the lights off.

    Christine and I JUST finished filling in all the blanks on our forms. GUYS THAT WAS SO MUCH. And we need wet (HAHA) signatures from her so she’s been at the Post Office in the Philippines forever. But I guess it’s such a small price to pay for her to get here right?

    I dreamed of camp last night. It was really weird and cute and I felt extremely happy. We were definitely at Alpine Meadows but it looked different? Like I don’t remember a really high hill being there…we were running down it? But then everyone was in line waiting for Julia Nunes to drop this album!! I passed by all your faces going back to my cabin to change. HAHA. Typical me.

    Here’s Andy sleeping with Christine. He is always like this I’m told. I’m very excited to touch him because she sent me this really great picture of his tail and it’s so damn fluffy.

    Jessy Meowington being handsome.

    Very rare shot of the two of them in the same area. Not that they don’t get along but Jessy loves to spend his time looking at birds outside. Haha. As you can see Andy clearly hates the bed because of how warm it gets. Jessy needs a pillow or something under him when he wants to be comfy. JEEZ. =p

    • You are going to be together so soon! I’m so excited for you!!! And for Andy, too!

      Aww, I dreamt about camp for a few weeks after we got home. I want to go back. Can I go back with you in your next dream?

      But what about your hair? Isn’t it still great?
      My hair is great. I just got it cut today, in fact, and I extended my undercut all the way around my head. How is your fantastic hair?

      Where are all your furbabies?
      Sadly, we had to put one of our furbabes to sleep last week and it was very sad, but she had a long and happy life. So now it’s just us, a guinea pig, a cat, and a rabbit. The guinea pig lost it’s friend earlier this year, but is just fine and happy being a solo pig. She’s weird like that. The rabbit is still adjusting and we are figuring out what to do. Bonding him was hellish the first time, so we’re not sure if we’re going to get him a friend. Right now he seems OK, but we feel a little bad about him being alone. The cat is a beautiful asshole and he loves us.

      And if you have real babies?
      Not yet. Trying.

      What’s cold like where you are?
      It’s in the 70’s during the day and 60’s at night right now and it’s perfect. Sorry LA is hot! Have you tried putting an ice pack in your shirt? That’s what I do when it’s hot.

      <3 you, V!

      • But Kaelyn you were in the dream!! I think everyone in our staff cabin was there. I felt happy and sad when I woke up from it.

        My hair is the same. Long black with gray and straight. Ive always told Christine that when the day comes where I have more gray than white hair I’ll get it cut very short and will never color it. Haha.

        Andy is excited too. Im pretty sure Im gonna go overboard with buying lots of stuff for him. Haha.

        Sorry about your least they had a good long life. Many many cheers to them.

        Idk what to do about the heat except nap a lot. Lol

  22. Answering question about cold: I needed to find hand-warmers this morning, and the pair I wanted (will want again in the morning) were at school, in the back of my gym clothes drawer. And they still are at school. This has been my week. Nothing terribly successful, nothing actually meaningful failed.

    I astonishingly rarely– like maybe once a year but not every year– remember a dream. It’s fascinating to read all your dreams and it makes me wonder what goes on in my brain at night. Or perhaps it’s better to not remember?

  23. Ya’ll, yesterday was my first official day as a BSW student! I’m technically a third year but because I just transferred in from community college, I feel like a total frosh. I have so many contradictory feels right now. Like I’m so happy and excited at the prospect of meeting people with similar interests and never having to take a class that doesn’t interest me ever again! But also I’m fucking terrified because I’m taking the most credits I’ve ever taken in one semester and on top of that I have to do sixty hours of volunteer service AND all of my classes have multiple big time projects to complete and aslf;ldkghlksflhk WHAT IF I CAN’T HANDLE IT??? Also I’m scared my perfectionism is gonna get the best of me and I’m gonna berate myself endlessly if I don’t live up to the impossible standards I’ve set for myself. So….peachy with a side of keen, that’s me. ::eyes emoji:: (side note: I’ve been seeing a therapist since April and….tbh thank the lord for that…we’re gonna start working on stress management next session and it couldn’t come at a better time lmao)

    As far as dreams go, I only ever remember my nightmares. I have one recurring niggtmare that goes like this: I’m being chased by bad guys (how do i know they’re bad guys? idk I just know) but I can’t get my body to move right. It’s like I’m running through quicksand. I take like three steps and then fall down. Get up, repeat. This continues until they close in on me and I wake up. Not cool.

    Happy weekend!

    • Did you see our thing about going to schoooool! It’s great! You’re great! I’m sure BSW is going to be great!!!!!!

      Being chased is a pretty common nightmare. Here’s what the dream dictionary says:

      “I’m Being Chased!”

      Being chased in your dream is one of several common dream theme stemming from feelings of anxiety in your waking life. In such dreams, you could be running from an attacker, an animal, a monster or some unknown figure who wants to hurt or possibly kill you. Fight or flight is an instinctive response to a physical threat in the environment. Thus it is natural to run or hide or try to outwit your pursuer.

      Being chased signifies avoidance:
      To dream that you are being chased is an indication that you are avoiding some issues in your waking life. The actions in your dream exemplify how you respond to pressure and cope with fears, stress or various situations. Instead of confronting the situation, you have a tendency to run away and avoid issues that you are uncomfortable with addressing.

      Being chased signifies close-mindedness:
      If someone is chasing you in your dream, then it may also refer to your close-mindedness. You are refusing to acknowledge a certain viewpoint or idea and don’t even want to give a listen to any opinion that is different from yours.

      Being chased signifies running away from yourself:
      Another way to analyze your chase dream is how the pursuer or attacker may be an aspect of your own Self. Perhaps you are suppressing or rejecting certain feelings or certain characteristics of your Self. Anger, jealousy, fear, and even love can manifest as a threatening figure in your dream. And you could be projecting these feelings onto the unknown chaser.

      Being chased signifies fear:
      Running from an attacker in your dream may simply represent your fear of being attacked. Such dreams are more common among women than men, who may feel physically vulnerable in their surroundings. All you have to do is turn on the news to hear stories of violence and sexual assault.

      In understanding your own dream of being chased, ask yourself who is chasing you so that you can gain a better understanding . What are you running from? Turn around and confront your pursuer and ask them why they are chasing you.

      Consider the distance or gap between you and your pursuer. This indicates your closeness to the issue. If the pursuer is gaining on you, then it suggests that the problem is not going to go away. The problem will surround you, until you confront and address it. However, if you are able to widen the gap between your pursuer, then you are able to successfully distance yourself from the problem. In essence, the problem is fading away.

  24. The funniest dream I think I’ve ever had involved me going to Target after work one day, bumping into Adele (because she’d totally be at a Target in the suburbs of Ohio on a Tuesday), making friends with her, buying bagel bites and inviting Adele back to my apartment to enjoy my bagel bites. She accepted and we had fun.

    The weirdest dream I’ve ever had was one in which I died. Twice. I was playing ultimate frisbee in a parking garage with some friends in Chicago, and then a nuclear bomb went off and I died. Then I woke up and I was by some sort of lake that was a post-bomb wasteland, and then another one went off and I died again.

    In other news, I’ve just wrapped up the craziest week and a half I’ve had in a while. I left my job, moved, went to an out of state wedding while making a 7 hour detour to see an old friend, then started my new job. It was insane. Then today I was bored (the side effect of starting a new job), so I decided to check the download stats on my master’s thesis. When I checked, I noticed that it had actually been cited in a scholarly article. I was blown away by that. I mean, someone read it, thought it actually said important things, and brought value to their paper. I figured when I wrote it, no one would ever read it or use it, but they did! All of the work I put into it felt validated. I’ve been smiling about it all day.

    Now, here are some snapchats/photos of Watson, since I’ve missed posting on the FOT for a few weeks.

    This happened as I was packing up to move. Watson ate something, threw up everywhere, then decided to knock his water bowl over in protest as he was tied up to my kitchen table as I was cleaning everything up.

    He also judges me for my driving.

    He’s also a demanding little bugger.

    But he’s great at snuggling.

    • Wow! Congrats on all the amazing life changes! And on being cited in a scholarly article–very cool! I found out a couple years ago that a blog post I wrote in 2008 was cited in an article and it was like…bizarre. It’s very very cool when someone thinks you’re smart!

      Watson is SO CUTE. Oh gosh, I might die. I want to (gently) squeeze him!!!

      Here we go with the dream dictionary. I’m gonna’ go with your inception death dream because death dreams (or as they call them on Adventure Time, “croak dreams”) are pretty common experiences.

      Death dreams:
      Dreaming of your own death symbolizes inner changes, transformation, self-discovery and positive development that is happening within you or your life. You are undergoing a transitional phase and are becoming more enlightened or spiritual. Big changes are ahead for you where you are making a new start and leaving the past behind. If you are getting married or divorce, being promoted to a new position, moving to a new country, you may experience dreams of your own death.

      The frightening and alarming nature of death can in itself be a wake- up call for something. It is your mind’s way of trying to grab your attention to something dire in your waking life where you need to take action. Consider how you felt in your dream and think about a situation in your waking life where you felt the same way.
      For some, dreaming of your own death may be a health warning. Perhaps you have been putting off a doctor visit. Or perhaps you need to make some unhealthy lifestyle changes.

      To dream that you die may mean that you are desperately trying to escape from the demands of your daily life. This may be some major stressor, obligation, responsibility or perhaps you want out of a painful relationship.

      In some cases, to dream that you die is symbolic of your sacrifices. You feel that you are always putting your needs of others first.

      Your dream of death should usually not be taken literally. Look at the dream death as symbolic of something in your waking life that is changing or ending.

      Nuclear Bomb: To dream of a nuclear bomb suggests feelings of helplessness and loss of control. You are experiencing some strong hostility and rage, where it is nearly destructive. Important changes are about to occur. You may also be expressing a desire to wipe out some aspect of yourself. Alternatively, the nuclear bomb serves as an indication that something crucial and precious to you has ended.

      Frisbee: To see or play Frisbee in your dream represents an easy-going attitude or a lack of competitive spirit. It also serves to remind you that situations and relationships in life are give and take.

      Parking Lot: To dream that you are in parking lot suggests that you need to slow down and take time from your daily activities.

  25. My day went p shitty p fast, so I guess all I’ll pop in to say is, I got a dog. They think he’s a pit bull collie mix. I renamed him Dúrin, after Tolkien’s Dwarf lord. But he’s really kinda a scaredy dog. I got him Monday evening and he’s still uncomfortable outside. He won’t play yet. He goes to the vet for a check up tomorrow and im worried about how he’ll act and if he’ll bite someone. Just bc no one knows how he was socialized.

    Anyways, here’s a picture of him from yesterday. He sleeps so much. He’s sleeping right now. Also the Dúrin tag on my tumblr has all my posts of him thus far, if you wanna see more of the silly noodle.

    • Aahhh, congrats on your new fur baby! Hopefully he’ll relax a bit once he gets settled into the new environment. Moving to a new home can be stressful for animals – I’m sure he’ll warm up soon.

      • Thank you! Yeah, I’m hoping he gets more and more comfy; it’s only been a week. I’m just so nervous!

        And he sleeps a ton and sighs so much, it’s so cute

    • Congrats! What a cutie-patootie! We adopted a scaredy cat and were concerned he wouldn’t adapt, but he did! He still hates and fears people who aren’t us, but he is quite happy to be around us 24/7 and is a real lover. Hopefully you’ll be able to work with him. He seems really sweet. If it gets real stressful for him, some vets will prescribe anxiety meds to chill your dog out before a visit. Yay furbabies!

      • He really is sweet :) he’s meet a few strangers and was good with them, and was really good at the vet! I’m so glad. Everyone there said how cute he is. :D

        What pup do you have?

    • Naming sturdy built lil possibly pit mix after a dwarf is the most fitting of things, d’aw.

      Pits can be very shy and sometimes dogs no matter their natural shy or unshyness can take a while to get out their shell and get comfy in a new place. Especially dogs that spent time in an animal shelter.

      Try in the waiting room if possible to sit somewhere that won’t have a lot of activity that could make him nervous.
      Keep your body infront your dog instead of letting him get infront of you if someone one approaches so he’s not between ya in spot he feels the need to defend for you.
      Tell the vet folks when it gets to the appointment he’s shy and came from a shelter hopefully they’ll interact with him accordingly
      And you try not to be nervous, try to be calm because I’m sure you know dogs feel our feels. I feel like a jerk telling you to be calm and am worried I’m gunna make you more worried.
      Just do your best.

      • Yeah, it’s only been a week, so I’m hoping he gets more comfy over time :)

        Don’t worry, I’ve been told a lot recently that my emotions will affect the dog’s. Which is kinda hilarious considering how anxious I get haha. But he was really good at the vet! I was glad. And everyone said how cute he is :D Like yes, compliment my dog, it gives us powerrr.

  26. I never remember my dreams.. but, I have been told I talk in my sleep.. Sometimes gibberish, sometimes actual words. Always fun explaining that one to a new love interest.

    • My first roommate in college used to talk in her sleep. And by talk I mean shout. She warned me, but I didn’t believe her. One night she woke me up because she was yelling about the chair being in the wrong spot. I slept with headphones in after that.

  27. The most recent dream I can remember is like 2 years old and it was some one trying to convince me to have sex with them while I was trying to shower.
    It was annoying and he was obnoxious and physically kinda cold because he was in and out the shower under the AC vent. I wasn’t scared of him just supremely aggravated with a sorta cold nude body getting pressed against mine while I’m trying to enjoy the warm water of my shower.
    The obnoxious part was the stuff he was saying like, “I’m so pretty, you know you wanna” making pouty lips at me. Dude no you’re harshing on my happy warm shower buzz GTFO.
    I know 100% percent what maybe it was really about interpretation wise, but my in dream focus how annoying it was to have my nice shower interrupted like that is too funny.

    But the weirdest dream I ever had is a tie between one that involved sharks, a shape shifting fish, a dino island, an emo t-rex, evil scientists and genetically modified murderous maiasaura with Hulk-like jumping skills and weaponized tongue.

    And the one were I was a Han Solo action figure and with the help of Tinkerbell Barbie saved my 12 grade Business Math class from environmental terrorists. I grenaded some of the terrorists at some point which felt like something I’d probably do because I can throw well, it was tactically sound and I was a fucking action figure of an action hero.

    The one with the all the dinosaur stuff started out with me as a fish that happened upon a secret shark meeting or rally that was about their Rights as Sharks of Barton and decided fuck this Imma outta here. Swam like hell and once I reached shore shape sifted into a dino because it was Dino Island.
    Things were chill until that maiasaura hopped on to D-Island from that island with the evil scientists and started killing everyone. She had a poisonous weapon tongue and so every body ran rather than fight her except for the emo t-rex. He defeated her in combat, but of course died of the poison.
    How did I know he was an emo t-rex you wonder? His bangs and eye liner of course.

    Kaelyn if you’re still dream interpreting, INTERPRET THE DION ONE.
    I was in high school at the time if that helps.
    Also I have learned eyeliner pretty much the only thing for my face. I can eyebrow pencil and with eyeshadow do the smoky eye or what but am equal parts lazy and if not going on stage I forget about brow liner will scratch my brow or something. Additionally eye shadow makes my eyelids feel heavy and without the adrenaline of a show it makes me sleepy. So sleepy I started to nod off in loud club situation.

    Adorable animal thing:
    After petting something small and adorable I fell asleep cuddling the small and adorable being like she was a teddy bear and not y’know a dog. I think she woke up because things got too warm for her, being nested against a human and a couch.
    Rather than lie down somewhere else once getting free she crawled up the couch, became a little doughnut and watched over me from the top of the couch like a guard-kitty in dog form till I feel back asleep.

    Beh I feel like I should be writing Katrina things but I’m tired and a little bugged with some national media and their sloppy “coverage”.
    The focus on New Orleans because it’s more interesting to people outside this region has always bugged me, but some of the focus is because of the governmental failures that lead to catastrophe where it was suppose to be prevented. Which is a good thing.
    It’s just in local news that it is made more clear, to me anyway.

    Last year I tried to start an essay that was mixture of personal narrative and research paper on the failures (preventable failures) that made things worse than the storm initially did and more. I wanted to use my privilege to high light how for some people evacuation is not a viable option without outside help that can sometimes be it’s own catastrophe.
    Did you know when those buses came they wouldn’t let people bring their pets?
    Would you stay behind with your pet or would you leave them behind?


    Breached castles bled…og brostnar borgir bløða.

  28. I very rarely remember my dreams. I actually can’t remember having a sex dream, or even a making-out dream, like, ever? And I wonder what that means.
    I just finished my second week of college! I’ve been going through some rough stuff (I ended a relationship right before moving in and the feelings are everywhere), and generally feeling doubt about whether I’m in the right place, BUT it turns out that my school’s Queer Student Union is wonderful and full of amazing people and so that is reassuring and glorious <3

  29. I came down with a flu one day during my first year of college and took a really long and feverish nap. When I woke up, my roommate told me that I had been blabbering on for a while, trying to explain math concepts to her in my sleep. I’m not sleep-talker and I’ve never been great at math, nor was I taking a math class that semester…so that was super weird!

    Otherwise I usually have really vivid dreams, always in color, and remember quite a lot of them.

    Does anyone else experience dream deja vu? For instance: revisiting a completely imagined (and in my case, totally mundane) place in multiple dreams, and suddenly realizing that you’ve “been there before” while you’re still dreaming? I do fairly often and it makes for the most bizarre dreams.

    • I think I might have actually.

      When I had pneumonia and a high fever my last year of high school I had a dream at the highest point of my fever that revisited a dream I had in elementary school about being executed in this place where lots of other people were being executed.
      I had my very own scaffold like before, the same guards, same dude shouting at me and throwing the same book at my feet, same method of execution, same executioner but I felt the weight of my chains more clearly, my joints ached and when it was time for me to die the focus shifted to high above the place.

      During the dream I realised the difference, it wasn’t a recurrence, with the joint pain because I was thinking ‘ah fuck fever pains they are so infuriating’ and they are.
      When you dislocate something, work out or break something there’s a purpose, but fever aches and pains are a byproduct of your body fighting something off and you already feel terrible. After puking, fever pains are the most infuriating body thing of being sick in a non-chronic or hospital-y way.

    • I have dream deja vu, but in a different way. Like, I’ll have a dream that I think is super weird, and then at random times (while I’m awake) I’ll think “wait a minute. This is exactly like that one dream I had that one time.” It kind of weirds me out sometimes.

  30. I never remember my dreams anymore. When I was a kid, I remembered them all the time (and boy, oh, boy did I have some weird ones) and I still remember a few of them, but I just don’t remember any dreams anymore.

    As for what I’m up to, my college is back in session and I love my classes. Still don’t have the second job I need, but I applied for a good one at an astrophysics research center on campus and I have the support of one of my professors. So we’ll see what happens with that.

  31. Dreams have been on my mind lately. I suffered from night terrors from 4 to 16. I always had regular nightmares after that. Then, about 2 years ago, the nightmares/dreams stopped. It was a little unnerving. I’m sure I dreamnt during that time, but was unaware.

    Three weeks ago I dreamed, and it was amazing. I wrote down what I could remember immediately. There was a very elderly lady at the beginning with a boat similar to small sail boats from the late 1800’s. The boat was in her living room and she was looking down at it. Then the dream shifted to an earlier time with a man and small child. They were on the same boat in rough seas… The rest played out like a movie switching to the next generation of boat ownership in the desert this time. In the end it flashed back to the elderly lady and the house flooding due to a bad storm. Clinging to the side of the boat the house breaks apart and that’s where it stopped. It was a vivid dream and felt real but the small details left me almost immediately when I woke up. I was glad to have dreamed again.

  32. The scariest dream I ever had was several years ago. It started out with two people exploring some sort of weird cave and they were all in these crazy hazmat suits. And I wasn’t one of the people. It was just like I was watching a movie (a lot of my dreams are like this, very cinematic). So, they’re in this cave and it’s really moist, like dripping, and it’s dark. They have flashlights and lights on their suits and the cave walls look like some sort of flesh. The people are terrified. There’s a woman and a man. She’s particularly distressed. She’s lost a loved one and says they have to find the thing that did it. Then they move their flashlights around a bit and there’s dead bodies in sacs on the walls. Now they’re really freaked out, but they keep going towards the end of the cave. They finally reach the end and there’s this weird, gangly creature, hairless, naked and completely pale. It looks like Gollum without any of the cuteness. And the woman just absolutely loses it. She charges at it and starts wailing on it with her flashlight and screaming, “You killed him!” And it’s at this point that the POV switches to the creature’s POV. Turns out I’m the goddamn monster! And this lady is killing me! And I heard this really rapid breathing and it woke me up. It wa me, in real life, breathing super fast and hard because I literally thought I was going to die! Yikes.

    But also, I once had a dream about buying a new toothbrush. And it was a really great toothbrush. Wild stuff.

  33. Also, I wanted to rant a little bit about something I just saw on Huffington Post because none of my friends ever really get worked up with me about queer stuff. So, anyway, they had this video on there and the headline was that Lily-Rose Depp had come out as sexually fluid, which was news to me, because from what I had seen, she had just come out as not straight, or “somewhere on the vast spectrum” as the guy behind the Self-Evident Truths project put it.

    So, I thought maybe they had a new statement or interview with her where she expanded on and clarified that. But they had no new info. These people just decided that she was sexually fluid. Like, just straight up assigned this 16 year old girl her sexual identity. And then the guy in the video had some lady on to talk to him about it and I forget why he said he was talking to her, but once she started speaking, it was obvious that she was probably a celebrity gossip expert and not a human sexuality expert, or anything logical like that.

    They talked about how lots of young people like Kristen Stewart and Miley Cyrus are now coming out as sexually fluid (once again, Kristen Stewart didn’t really do that either). And it may be true, I think more young people are less interested in affixing a label to themselves and that’s totally fine and wonderful. But then this lady starts talking about how young they are and this is the time when people experiment. Because, of course, all of these nice pretty girls are going to grow up to be straight and marry a nice man eventually. UGH. And she said something about how it made her uncomfortable to talk about Lily-Rose’s sexuality because she’s only sixteen. Which is bullshit. She’s uncomfortable talking about it because Lily-Rose is only sixteen and not straight. If the news was that she was dating some hot, young male celebrity, then this lady would have been more than happy to talk about it. And it’s not like Lily-Rose was like, “Hey, let’s talk about the people I fuck.” She just came out as not straight. How does that make anyone (other than homophobes) uncomfortable?

    And I think the reason the media has latched onto this idea that more young people are sexually fluid, as opposed to gay or straight, is because they’re uncomfortable with the fact that it might just mean that more young people feel safe coming out as queer these days. They want to talk about it like it’s a new trendy phase in these youngsters lives and they’ll eventually grow out of it and become upstanding, straight citizens. So, they like to say sexually fluid (which is actually a totally valid identity and I’m not criticizing it at all) because Queer scares them. But it’s not a trend. It’s not like, all of a sudden it’s hip to be queer. I feel like we would have had just as many kids coming out when I was in high school (early 00s) if same sex marriage had been legal at the time. It’s not trendy, it’s just progress and more and more kids just aren’t scared to death to be themselves these days and it’s amazing.

    Oh! And I almost forgot the part when that lady referred to Lily-Rose as the “lovechild” of Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis and said something about their fast, freewheeling lifestyle like that explained everything about Lily-Rose’s sexuality. So, basically she said they corrupted her. And shamed her for being the daughter of unwed parents. But they were in a committed relationship for like 14 years! She’s not a lovechild, for crying out loud.

    Okay, sheesh, I think I’m done ranting. Sorry not sorry/sort of actually sorry.

    • Good rant is good.

      My grandmother remembers Prohibition and is so removed from the modern world and pop culture that she thought the Fifth Element was a horror picture and warned me I’d get nightmares. She can say lovechild, a modern ass human involved in modern media fuck no.

      Also fuck that lady and her judge-y dumbass sex-shaming ways, a committed relationship is committed relationship. It’s like that time some ass wrote into to Dear Abby to say “Please advise your readers; if they aren’t married, they are STILL single!”
      Just ew no go back to Victorian high society where you belong.

      I feel you on the call any queerness as phase thing in the “hope they’ll grow out it” too. Right on the money with that.

  34. A lot of times my dreams seem so obviously symbolic that even I’m like “all right brain chill.” Like, a couple of weeks ago I had a dream that I was on a date with this really lovely girl at this fancy restaurant that only sold pizza. It was late and dark, so we decided to take a cab back to my apartment, but instead the cab driver kidnapped us and took us to his creepy Stepford-y neighborhood. He kept us tied up in his living room, which was very tastefully decorated, and said he was going to barbecue us for the neighborhood block party. I managed to get a hand free to text my roommate, but I didn’t want to seem needy or overdramatic so I kinda down-played what was happening and he thought I was joking and didn’t come.

    I feel like the whole thing was a thinly-veiled allegory for literally all of my problems.

  35. dreamt that I was hanging out with this girl I’ve been crushing on and she saw that I’d written her name in my notebook and when she asked me about it I tried to play it cool like oh…that was a note…that I forgot to send you…? LOLz *runsaway*

  36. Long time no see! Xoxoxoxoxo
    Love you guys!

    I, too, actively dream every night, anywhere from 2-8 dreams a night, and I remember them all, or sometimes more of one, but the others upon recall. They are mostly nightmares, and I intentionally slept only 4-5 hours a night for at LEAST 5 years in order to avoid them (different dreams still happened, but without the horrors of REM). So, on this basis I have 2 bits of experience go share what an active dreamer can do to help process their dreams.

    1.) When you wake up, write down your dreams. It will help you process your emotions, and you won’t spend bits of the rest of your day wondering why you feel like shit, or wondering what’s eating you, when actually what’s eating you is the giant lemming army that chased you off a cliff.

    2.) You ready for this? You are every person in your dream. You are the lemming army. Maybe you are experiencing microagressions of self-loathing through your day, and it is pushing you over the edge. Your brain is processing those emotions for you. That’s why I write it down – taking notes ;)

    In other news, I’m back to school and lovin’ it. Pride was a shit show, but in the best way possible. I’ve been very humbled by events of this week. Two cute girls asked me out, and I didn’t know what to do, because I have been really busy with this gang of lemmings I know.

  37. Aghh! I missed such an awesome open thread. Dream interpretation is super fun.
    I’m trying to think of any recent weird dreams I’ve had… Well, I’ve been dreaming about an unofficial ex of mine a lot. (We’re friends now) She’ll usually kiss me or something and I would kiss her back or otherwise enjoy it. WHICH IS WEIRD BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO GET BACK WITH HER ANYWAYS (I did the “breaking up”).

    But here’s a more obscure dream I had about a couple months ago. Sorry I can’t think of anything more recent! Anyways, me and my dad were at a museum, and we were in a section that featured Native Mexican sculptures from a couple thousand years ago. There was one that vaguely resembled this . In my dream it was made out of geometric sections of marble, mostly white, but there was some red marble sections too. I had the strangest inclination to chip away at the statue, and that’s what I did. In the center of the statue there was an opening, and I found a burning flame on a very long wick. The flame had been burning inside for hundreds of years, but it sadly died after being exposed to the air. It was a pretty cool dream!

    On another note, I just got back after a week-long trip in Yosemite. It’s my favorite place in the world, and I feel mentally refreshed. Now it’s time for me to finally get 100% focused on packing for college.

  38. Last night I had a dream where my housemates decided to rent out my closet.
    But apparently I know how to play cool in Dream Land. I told them the new closet bedroom could serve as a sex chamber.
    And then I woke up and realized that didn’t make any sense.

  39. Duh, I got your Raffi reference. Love Raffi!

    I don’t remember any dreams lately. Probably because I haven’t slept much in the past week. The show I’m producing (Beth Malone: So Far) is on Monday, and between that, my 2 jobs, and my new play, I haven’t found much time to sleep. My new play is called May/December, and it’s about the relationship of a 45 year-old woman and a 25 year-old woman. The play takes place in a therapy session and the memories the women recall in therapy. I’m having a table read tomorrow, so hopefully after that, I’ll be able to continue to develop it.

  40. I have a friend who thinks that talking about dreams, her own or other people’s, is the most boring thing ever. I love her, but she is so wrong.

    I dreamed last night that a bunch of nice middle-aged ladies kidnapped me and took me to their knitting store/commune where they were really nice to me and told me all about their business plans. Yeah.

  41. I have the most boring dreams ever. Like seriously, the other week I dreamed that I got up on Sunday morning and cleaned my room and the kitchen and the bathroom. Then I woke up, and it was Sunday morning, and I actually had to clean the bathroom in real life. Or I’ll dream that I went to work and everything was normal, or that I went shopping and I was driving around the parking lot looking for a place to park.

    I did have one really cool dream recently though! I was flying or gliding through the air somehow, over an ocean or lake or bay or something, and it was really fun. That dream was right before I went on vacation, so that’s maybe where that came from.

  42. I keep having dreams about my crush girl and ugh my god, it’s plunging me in too deep and I can’t remember what messages she’s sent are real and what aren’t when it’s early in the morning.

    I dreamed last night she was the child of people from a faraway country and her parents threatened to take her back to the country due to ‘not concentrating on her schoolwork’ but really because she was with me, and we were kissing and stuff. Through a long process of making her ceramics projects amazing Grecian urns and cooking food for her parents we managed to let her stay but it was weird. I’m friendly with her parents as we are both still studying in English college and they are nothing like that in physical or mental respects

    one time I had a long dream that I was wearing links clothing and I astral projected into a deeper dream level where I was training to become a master of dreams, and I could shape things, inception-style, and fly for shortish lengths of time.
    Crush girl was an alive dreamer who was coming into the realm nightly. I fought a giant who came into a ship with her and we started seeing each other more often, but I changed my appearance a lot so she didn’t always know it was me. So every so often, when she was in trouble, I’d swoop in and save her , then turn into basically myself with blue hair and talk to her, and go hang out. Then her stepfather, who was evil (her parents are married) managed to find a way in one day, and was abusive and tried to assault her violently. in attempting to stop him he gained a lot of power and was going to trap her under the ocean, malachite-style. In stopping him, I sacrificed my physical body, and thus my projections became weak and I drifted as a ghost. but at the end, all was well, and I saw her again.

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