Welcome back to Boob(s On Your) Tube, your twice-weekly round-up of all the queer lady things happening on your teevee! This week’s columns are back to their regularly scheduled days (Tuesday and Friday). Thank you for being patient and allowing me to smush last Friday’s column into today’s column. Like I mentioned last Tuesday, my grandma came New York City to visit me and meet my girlfriend for the first time, and it was wonderful to have a few days off to spend with her.
An exciting announcement: I would like to introduce you to Autostraddle dot com’s two new interns, Karly and Sadie! They will be tag-teaming with me to make Autostraddle’s teevee coverage better and better. I am so excited to start working with them and so excited for you to meet them. They’re both super smart and super invested in queer and trans representation on television. You’ll be reading their words and seeing their screencaps in the coming weeks. Please say hi to them in the comments!
And now: The queer TV!
Chasing Life
Mondays on ABC Family at 9:00 p.m.
![chasinglife2](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/chasinglife2.png?resize=640%2C360)
Hey girl, wanna read some Sparia fan fiction and listen to Endless Love by candlelight?
![chasinglife1](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/chasinglife1.png?resize=640%2C360)
FUCK YES
Last week Chasing Life sent me on an emotional roller coaster that skidded off a cliff and into the sea! I actually wasn’t caught up because it looked like Brenna was going to be dating Finn for the rest of the season, and I’m all for bisexual characters exploring their bisexuality, but, like, Famke Janssen and Viola Davis were making out on my DVR, so my eyeballs were needed elsewhere. Okay, but then my friend Valerie, she told me that Greer had Apparated onto the scene for the season finale, so I rushed to catch up. And there she was! Greer! Standing in Brenna’s doorway smiling like the sun after a hard day’s rain talking about how she was moving back to town, and the hint of course was that they could be gal pals again. That’s how the finale ended!
But then ABC Family pulled the plug and now there will be no more Chasing Life forever.
Brenna was a rare unicorn. She was one of the few TV characters who actually labeled herself as bisexual and said the word out loud repeatedly. The writers never tripped over any terrible bi stereotypes or leaned on any damaging bi tropes. She liked guys and she liked gals and she had meaningful relationships with both of them. I will miss her (and what she could have had with Greer!) very much.
Grandfathered
Tuesdays on Fox at 8:00 p.m.
![grandfathered2](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/grandfathered2.png?resize=640%2C360)
Wanna come inside and watch the Lifetime Full House movie?
![grandfathered1](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/grandfathered1.png?resize=640%2C360)
I thought you’d never ask.
Well, here’s a surprise: I kind of liked Grandfathered? I hate the premise and I hate that this show and Grinder are exactly the same thing, airing back-to-back, and starring two white dudes — instead of The Mindy Project and New Girl, which Fox had slated in this block for three years. But the show kind of worked for me. It features a pretty huge supporting cast for a sitcom, and two of the three main female characters are women of color. (The third is Paget Brewster, who elevates every scene she’s in on every show always.)
Like I mentioned last week, the show is about selfish rich bachelor John Stamos finding out he’s got a grown-up son and also a granddaughter. He owns a really successful L.A. restaurant and the manager is Annelise, a gay lady who reveals her sexuality when John Stamos goes to confront Paget Brewster about how come she never told him they have a kid together. Paget Brewster says he would have been a horrible dad because of how he was a horrible boyfriend, then she leans out the door where Annelise is standing and:
Paget Brewster: Speaking of which … girlfriend?
Annelise: Employee. Lesbian.
Paget Brewster: Smart.”
Annelise: Job requirement.
Paget Brewster: I like you!
Annelise: Let’s be friends!
Later when John Stamos tries to complain about Paget Brewster to Annelise, she says, “Yeah, I’m on her side. She’s awesome.”
So the story of course is that John Stamos has to learn to balance his work life with her personal life and ultimately will rekindle his romance with Paget Brewster and move to Vermont to make homemade organic baby food.
Scream Queens
![screamqueens1](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/screamqueens1.png?resize=640%2C360)
They took the midnight train going to death’s door.
Tuesdays on Fox at 9:00 p.m.
Sam the Predatory Lez is still alive on Scream Queens, but she hasn’t done anything notable or spoken more than five words together. She basically just follows the Chanels around and does what they say and cleans up the blood every time someone else gets murdered in the KKT house. Nick Jonas, who plays gay Boone, faked his death in episode two and revealed that he’s in league with the Red Devil, and now I’m wondering if it’s Sam? Wouldn’t it be so Ryan Murphy to take the lesbian and the gay dude and turn them into evil mass murdering psychos like some kind of commentary on Glee fandom? (Yes. Yes, it would.)
Empire
Wednesdays on Fox at 9:00 p.m.
Written by Carolyn Wysinger
![empire5](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/empire5.png?resize=640%2C360)
It’s true. I look good in literally anything.
Empire really took a step backwards this week and showed that it still has some growing to do if it’s going to live up to its name. One fan said she wished that she had DVR’d it so she could finish watching Judge Judy. That’s pretty damn bad. But how could it have been that bad? Was it lacking its usual drama?
The drama was there from the beginning as Cookie, Andre and Hakeem walked out on Empire to start their own company. Andre isn’t too sure but Hakeem is still looking for ways to get away from answering to Jamal as head of the company. Cookie doesn’t want Boo Boo Kitty Anika to be part of the company but Hakeem sneaks her into the deal.
Meanwhile Lucious has his weekly meds withheld for unknown reasons. He has also cultivated a little following of fans that encourage him to freestyle with them. This is where the episode starts to take a turn for the worst. Message to the producers of Empire: please STOP with the Hustle & Flow nostalgia. We get it, the show is like a natural continuation of the movie. We love the movie too. Please just leave it there. What comes next is one of the worst rap performances I have seen since Vanilla Ice performed on Arsenio Hall. Please never ever let Terrance Howard rap again.
Anyway, after the impromptu freestyle session a correctional officer played my Ludacris aggressively breaks up the group bringing about more Hustle & Flow memories (remember Howard’s character DJ went to prison for beating down Ludacris’ character, Skinny Black?)
While on a visit with Jamal, Lucious meets a new lawyer who promises to get him a bail hearing. He is a little fishy with his degree from the University of Guam but Lucious likes him and asks Jamal to set up a meeting with him. With the help of one of the prison officers, the lawyer, Thursty, helps sneak a producer and equipment into prison so that Lucious can record his God awful prison rap. His session is broken up by CO Ludacris and his band in blue who confiscate the recording. Thursty later pays some guys to beat Luda up in a parking lot and retrieve the music.
Cookie and the new dark stone faced Jamal go back and forth trying to influence Hakeem on whether he should return to Empire or stick with the new company that they name Lyons Dynasty. I will be happy when they are through trying to make Jamal cold; it doesn’t really fit him. Hakeem leaks his album online to spite Jamal and show that he has control of his own career, which pushes Andre over the edge and he tries to return to Lucious. Lucious sits somberly as Andre talks passionately about how much he loves Empire and how sorry he is for taking part of the hostile takeover. But Lucious is a cold piece; he asks Andre if he is still going to church (remember his almost affair with Jennifer Hudson?) When Andre says yes, Lucious tells him he better pray to God to forgive because he won’t. Andre asks Lucious why he hates him so much which prompts a flashback to his own mother (played by Kelly Rowland) who seems to have had mental health issues similar to the ones Andre struggles with.
Thursty succeeds in getting Lucious a bail hearing which he almost misses but rushes in with new “evidence,” which turns out to be dirty pictures of the judge. Needless to say, Lucious is immediately released on bail.
My hope is that all of this is just building the foundation for drama down the line for the Lyons clan. This episode was super bland and I would hate to think the show has already peaked when I still have so many more pearls to clutch.
Rosewood
![rosewood](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/rosewood.png?resize=640%2C360)
To report the Bury Your Gays trope, press one. To report criminal underuse of gay characters, press two.
Wednesdays on Fox at 10:00 p.m.
I hate to say it, but I don’t think Rosewood is going to make it a full season, y’all. Not even with the lead-in audience it’s getting from Empire. (Did I mention that Fox did a thing I HATE SO MUCH during the season two premiere of Empire? They recorded Rosewood onto my DVR by tricking it into thinking Empire was still on. That shit infuriates me.) Look, this was a smart play by Fox: Use the Bones formula but make the lead dude a black man and the lead lady a Latina woman and the supporting cast an interracial lesbian couple. Tried-and-true procedural meets DIVERSITY. But the critics kind of hate it. I’m not into procedurals at all, really, but I’m sticking with this one for Pippy and Tara, who spend this episode chained to their lab stations, working around the clock, but enjoying one quick snuggle on a couch and one quick karaoke duet (while being chained to their lab stations). Rosewood could get better! However, procedurals usually start really strong and fizzle out; not the opposite thing.
Grey’s Anatomy
Thursdays on ABC at 8:00 p.m.
![greys12-2-3](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/greys12-2-3.png?resize=640%2C359)
I’m FINE. I’m just going to throw up into this trash bin and smash my face into a wall, but I’m FINE.
Bailey’s first day as Chief doesn’t go exactly as planned. First, she kind of ruins her surprise party by assuming it’s a meeting and shutting it down because she wants to save lives instead of talking about saving lives. Then, she gives her team four hours to figure out a way to solve a pituitary problem that is making this one woman grow like one foot taller every year. (The woman almost dies, but then she doesn’t.) And then, everyone talks about how she’s a Bond villain and stuff, but affectionately. Bailey gets a nice pep talk from Richard and is going to be the best Chief ever, thank you very much, she just needed to find her footing and her balance. I’m glad she’s like season one badadd levels again, though. I love Bailey v. 1.0.
In other health-related news, Callie’s got a new lady in her life that’s making her heart flutter and her eyeballs bug out of her head because she just wants to stare at her for hours and hours without blinking. Arizona overhears her talking about it and changes the subject real quick to hospital business — for example, April has some kind of plague and is quarantined in a bubble — but later in the day she decides that she and Callie can do this. They can talk to each other about the new women in their lives. They can be grown-ups about it. They can be happy for each other. So when they’re trading off Sofia’s books, Arizona asks about Callie’s blossoming love.
![GREYS12-1](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/GREYS12-1.png?resize=640%2C359)
You watched all five seasons of Person of Interest on ONE weekend?
![greys12-2-2](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/greys12-2-2.png?resize=640%2C359)
Root and Shaw, man. What are you gonna do?
It takes about three seconds of Callie gushing about how Arizona would like this woman so much, and she and Callie finishes each other’s thoughts and also each other’s sandwiches, before Arizona shuts it down and affectionately tells Callie to learn to read the room.
Oh, these two! I’m happy they’re not trying to murder each other, but my heart does still ache for them!
How to Get Away With Murder
Thursdays on ABC at 10:00 p.m.
![htgawm-202-8](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/htgawm-202-8.png?resize=640%2C360)
Can you believe two actresses of our caliber are playing gay on broadcast network TV?
![htgawm-202-5](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/htgawm-202-5.png?resize=640%2C360)
No.
It wasn’t a dream! Annalise Keating really is bisexual!
Eve has taken Nate’s case, at Annalise’s behest, but things get real awkward real fast in the Grand Jury hearing when Nate refuses to lie like Eve and Annalise want him to. They want him to say he got into a scuffle with Sam the night of his murder, as a way to explain his fingerprints on Sam’s ring. But since he won’t do it, Eve goes with a whole other tactic: She lays out this really aggressive case to convince the Grand Jurors that Annalise is actually responsible for Sam’s death. It’s so convincing that they decide not to indict Nate after all, and so he is free to go.
But it’s not all champagne and caviar back at Annalise’s house. Her feelings are hardcore hurt at the way Eve went after her. It was so cold that it was obviously personal. And duh, of course it was. The thing is that Eve’s been telling herself she’s over Annalise all these years, telling herself she’s fine with the fact that Annalise left her for Sam, watching Faking It every week and crying into some Fruit Loops and then hurling her TV into the sun. Totally FINE. But that turned out to be a lie she was telling herself, and now that Annalise is standing in front of her and kissing her on the mouth, she’s having to admit that she’s still in love with her ex-girlfriend.
Annalise says, “It was good with you — and real. Too real. So I got scared and I left. But you’re the most beautiful thing that ever happened to me.”
And then they scissor! Eve thinks about pushing Annalise away, but that only lasts a nanosecond, and then they’re smashing their tongues into each other’s mouths and ordering Gal Pal t-shirts from Autostraddle dot com’s merch store.
![htgawm-202-4](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/htgawm-202-4.png?resize=640%2C360)
Bette with a dictionary on the balcony.
![htgawm-202-3](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/htgawm-202-3.png?resize=640%2C360)
Alice with a giant purse beside the pool.
![htgawm-202-2](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/htgawm-202-2.png?resize=640%2C360)
I love playing Who Killed Jenny Schecter with you. Come back soon!
After their night of rekindled passion, Eve basically proposes marriage to Annalise, asks her to move to New York and get a job at Columbia and they’ll be together forever and always, just real casual-like. Annalise says she’ll think about it. They smooch. And Nate sees the whole thing in his rearview mirror ’cause he’s stalking her.
Did I mention this year’s flash-forward is Annalise dying? It better not be Jean Grey who did it!
Carmilla
Tuesdays and Thursdays on YouTube
Written by Karly
![carm 36.4](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/carm-36.4.jpg?resize=640%2C326)
Anyone who prefers new Tumblr is a monster!
Wow! What a crazy, amazing, long finale. I just want to jump right into episode 36, but I’d be missing a big thing. So in episode 35, it’s Big Battle time and Kirsch is injured. As Laura and Danny bring him in the apartment, Laura laments that she thought Carmilla would help them. Danny fights back the hordes saying they don’t need that lazy vampire anyway!
Then Danny turns her back on an open door in the midst of a huge battle. I cannot stress these things enough: do not wear your last horcrux around your neck and do not turn your back on your enemies. Life lessons. As soon as Danny turns her back on the door, that bro Theo stabs her. Theo says Vordenberg gave him an offer he couldn’t refuse, blah blah blah. Sharon Belle gives her best performance all season delivering Danny’s last words. “I’m not scared, I’m not scared, I’m not…” Chills.
![carm 36.3](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/carm-36.3.jpg?resize=640%2C323)
These Pretty Little Liars spoilers are bumming me the fuck out, y’all.
Finale time! With Danny gone, the battle is over (I guess? She was really the best fighter of all?). Vordenberg swiftly enters and says he’s going to kill Carmilla. And he means right now. He pulls her in the room and she’s chained head to toe. Laura is mad that she didn’t come to help them, Carmilla is like ‘Hello, I am in chains.” We know this is all Perry’s fault. Perry gives the charter to Laura to kill Vordenberg (his horcrux).
Vordie says that if she kills him, the power of the board goes to the Corvae Corps, the shady black ops organization that was involved with the dean. Also it wouldn’t be very heroic to kill an old man, would it, Laura? But when he draws his sword, Laura cracks the charter over her knee. Vordenberg leaves the room to die gracefully and Perry follows.
That scary siren goes off and the Corvae Corps immediately take over the campus. JP goes to find Perry while LaFontaine, Laura, and Carmilla head to the library.
![carm 36](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/carm-36.jpg?resize=640%2C329)
It’s okay, sweetheart. PLL gave us five really good seasons.
In the library, LaF is upset because they think Perry and JP are dead. Carmilla and Laura comfort them. Yes that’s right, Carmilla comforts them too. What has happened? Several hours later, Laura and Carmilla are alone in a cupboard. Laura is in shock that she ruined everything, that she killed a man, and that in that moment, she didn’t care she killed a man because she wanted to save Carmilla.
Carmilla is the best girlfriend in the world. She wraps Laura in a blanket, hugs her, and holds her cheek while telling her you did what she could, and you can’t stop trying, and don’t let these mistakes turn you into me. This conversation is a 180 from let’s run away and sleep in hotels every night. I’ll probably watch this scene 30 more times.
Then they finally start to piece together that the dean got everything she wanted and how weird ‘cause she’s totally dead right? Right?
No, she’s in Perry’s body, and she is back in the apartment speaking directly to the webcam like it’s been her show all along. She’s been the dean since the battle in the pit. (Even during the Christmas special? Is nothing sacred!)
The Dean needs help so Kirsch brings Danny’s body in.. She resurrects Danny with some Latin(?) and Danny rises, but she’s completely silent. Kirsch is beside himself, and Danny gives him a huge kiss. There has to be one kiss every season finale, you see. It’s not bad. It’s weird, but not bad. Then Vampire?Danny eats Kirsch.
The Dean is in charge now, and maybe we should see her side of the story. “The first gate is open,” Dean says. “Only six more to go.” The last, last scene of the finale is pitch black. We hear the Dean saying that spell again and MATTIE WAKES UP. Oh hell yes. Forget what I said: you can wear your final horcrux and turn your back on your enemies, and then just be resurrected.
![carm 36.2](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/carm-36.2.jpg?resize=640%2C326)
I’m back, bitches, and I know EVERYTHING.
For the shortest hiatus ever, Carmilla just announced a season 0, a prequel to season 1, starting October 22. And I’m sure the announcement for season three is just around the corner.
Lost Girl
Sundays on (Canada’s) Showcase at 9:00 p.m.
Um. Tamsin is pregnant with Bo’s half-brother or sister after Bo’s dad pretended to be her and raped Tamsin in the last episode. That is what happened this week on Lost Girl. Y’all, what is HAPPENING to this show in the final episopdes?
Survivor’s Remorse
Saturdays on Starz at 9:30 p.m.
On this week’s Survivor’s Remorse, M-Chuck and Cassie are invited to sing the national anthem at an Atlanta college, so they hire a vocal coach name Christopher who legit says the words “the performance is nigh!” to them at one point. M-Chuck doesn’t think the Star Spangled Banner makes sense, to be honest, and she’s even more sure about it when Reggie convinces her “ramparts” means “ram parts” like the parts of a ram you grill eat like kebabs. M-Chuck wants to be the lead with her mom singing backup, but Cassie amazingly goes, “Not a chance, Sparkle!” and shuts the whole thing down. Ultimately, Julias sings the national anthem solo and crushes it.
Only one episode left of season one!
Team TV coverage you may have missed
+ Faking It Episode 216 Recap: Let’s Be Lesbians… Again!
+ 12 Couples Halloween Costumes For You and Your Taller or Shorter Gal Pal
SO MUCH TV. SO MANY FEELINGS.
Empire: I really, really don’t like Evil!Jamal. Also, it’s getting boring how these characters say they’re going to do something in one scene, and then the next scene, it just like, happens. No effort, no work, no buildup. One scene, Hakeem is going to put together a girl group. Next scene, he’s got one. One scene, Lucious is going to release a joint from the joint, next scene, it’s on the radio, NBD. One scene, they’re going to start a rival company, next scene, boom, they’ve got one. Why is everything so easy for this family?
Grey’s: Maybe I read that wrong, but my money is on Callie’s new lady being her vibrator. Just the way she gushed to Arizona about how much AZ would LOOOOVE her. Callie’s not that oblivious.
HTGAWM: Oh man, I didn’t think they go there again but they SO DID! Though kissing on the front porch in broad daylight was the stupidest thing either of these smart women have ever done. I defs thought it was going to be the ADA who saw them, not Nate. Or that Wes would catch them. Still waiting for that shoe to drop.
Lost Girl: I predicted Tamsin’s pregnancy last week, because that is what happens when gods disguise themselves in order to rape people. That is what Hades did to Aoife to make Bo. Wonder what kind of hellspawn comes from mixing Hades with a valkyrie?
– Why didn’t Perry destroy the charter herself, or have LaF do it? Did she need Laura to do it?
– I just love that Dean!Perry still wants to keep the blankets clean.
– Vamp!Danny. Danny’s not dead.
– Does this mean that Sharon Belle was just trolling us on her Twitter, or is she still leaving?
– Danny turns Kirsch into a Brotein Shake.
– I need a scene where Laura and Carmilla find out that Perry is the dean. They confront her, and Cat!Carmilla tries to capture her. Then a giant wolf comes out and smacks down Cat!Carmilla. The wolf changes into Vamp!Danny, and that’s how Laura finds out that Danny is still alive…ish.
– Speaking of horcruxes, here’s a theory for you: What if the Dean’s power is in her children like Vordie’s power was in the charter? In order to destroy the Dean you would have to kill Mattie, JP, Danny, and Mircalla. This would create a great sense of conflict. Destroying Mattie wouldn’t be that bad. She’s a narcissistic, hedonistic, psychopath. JP would probably willingly give up his life. Destroying Danny would be tough psychologically, emotionally, and most definitely physically. And then Carmilla…
Interesting theory but I don’t think it works because Perry!Dean actively hurt Mattie and seemed to hold her in contempt. My interpretation of the final scene (which omigod made me so much happier than Danny’s resurrection) was that Mattie was accidentally revived as a result of Dean resurrecting Danny. It seemed like The Dean really didn’t like Mattie or saw her as someone who was thwarting her takeover of the campus, so I’m skeptical that she’d treat one of her horcruxes this way.
– Was it the Dean who was doing that, or Perry, or a combination of the two? It’s difficult to tell with that sort of situation.
– While Mattie was carrying out the Dean’s final wishes, that’s not what got her killed. It was acting like Mattie that got her killed.
I read a theory on Tumblr that the incantation the Dean used on Danny ALSO revived Mattie and it wasn’t intentional. So that would also be an interesting conflict. Mattie was just trying to do the dean’s will, right? and that’s why she was killed. So Mattie might be a little pissed.
I think that the Dean uses everyone as pawns and she wouldn’t mind sacrificing some of them to reach her means. I don’t think she sees Carmilla, Laura, Danny etc. as threats to her plans so she let them live. Or you might be right and she needs them.
I assume she made Laura destroy the charter because she WANTED Laura to be put in a position to challenge her ethics. She knew it would damage her emotionally.
I’m surprised that Mattie’s accidental resurrection is considered a theory since it seemed so obvious to me that it was unintentional :/
I think Dean!Perry’s spell resurrected Mattie in Danny’s body–the show has been very clear that Danny isn’t attracted to Kirsch, so her kissing and vamp-eating him in a suggestive way is supposed to show that she isn’t Danny anymore. Plus the actress playing Danny uses Mattie’s body language & intonations after she revives.
Which would mean that the last image of Mattie waking up may show Danny waking up in Mattie’s body as a side effect.
Also I agree with PaperOFlowers that the latter has to be unintentional.
I just caught up entirely with Scream Queens and while I’ve never really watched Glee or AHS I feel like I understand so much better how Ryan Murphy has made so many tv-watchers lives’ difficult over the past few years. also i truly had no idea boone was nick jonas, so i’m grateful for the heads up.
Hi new interns :)
Carmilla was truly amazing and remarkable. Withholding the Perry!Dean reveal was genius. I honestly thought it was endgame. The trailer/teaser for 0 was great too. Can’t wait.
Other than that I’m over here on the other side of the ocean, (where we are at least a couple of months behind on the shows we get), rewatching PLL, (from the beginning – Christmas Ep), and pretending I didn’t read the last part of the Faking it recap because it actually made my brain hurt. Why can’t we have nice things? I had read that Lindsey Shaw was going to be in Scream Queens but it’s since disappeared from IMDb upcoming projects so thats a blessing.
Jean Grey. So hot.
“With Danny gone, the battle is over (I guess? She was really the best fighter of all?).”
Well they didn’t call her Xena for nothing.
Also I don’t think Perry was the dean the whole time. I think she gradually became possessed over the course of the season, like Ginny Weasley. There were times she’d have black out memories.
Or she only became possessed when she woke up with Latin carved into her abs.
When Dean!Perry yelled at Kirsch about the carpet and when she said she took her body after the Pit, I took that as “Oh she’s been pretending to be Perry this whole time.” But now looking back (and after reading some info on Tumblr), it *was* like a process. Which is interesting. But I’m glad she’s Full-Dean now because I think that is infinitely more juicy. I cannot wait for Annie Briggs to bring the house down as the dean.
Thanks for this!! I have lots of TV to catch up on….
Quick comment about Lost Girl: I used to love the show but gave up after the season 4 finale, where I was totally baffled. Sigh ;(
The Dean’s incantation is in Akkadian. The exact line is from the 7th-century BCE legend of the goddess Ishtar’s descent to the underworld (line 19): https://www.soas.ac.uk/baplar/recordings/itars-descent-to-the-netherworld-lines-1-125-read-by-martin-west.html It also appeared in the Epic of Gilgamesh (Tablet VI, line 99): http://www.soas.ac.uk/nme/research/gilgamesh/standard/file39594.pdf
Latin is too commonplace for an ancient vampire. :D
Whoa that’s cool. Thank you!
Hi new interns! Welcome!
– jean grey and viola Davis, oh my! That was great. Please come back Jean grey! And please don’t be the one to stab/shoot (not sure) viola Davis
– loved chief Bailey, loved that Meredith will be Bailey’s bailey. Still would prefer Calzona to be together though….
– my glee PTSD keeps me from seeing scream queens. Still upset about that horrible “I kissed a girl” episode and they treated fans afterwards (and the after Elton article about the writer, ugh)
HI SADIE!
HI CASEY!!!!
I love famke janssen and viola davis, they’re both beautiful, talented, incredible people. They have incredible chemistry, like so good I knew exactly what was happening before the reveal. But when they kiss, it looks like they’re aliens who don’t really know what kissing is, so they just kinda smash their faces together and hope for the best.
Also, I’m scared about the whole woman of color comes out on primetime, immediately dies thing that seems to be happening. I worship shonda for real, and u trust her, but I’ve been hurt so many times before, you know?
Also, scream queens has me which it weird because it offends me regularly. The humor is just so delightfully off beat and campy. I can’t wait to see what they do with Sam (she has to be there for a reason). I also think I like that character because I know someone exactly like her. Also, Lea Michele’s character calling all the characters mom cracks me up every time.
No way are they going to actual kill off Annalise. For starters, she’s the main character on the show – how would they all get away with murder if not for her? Number two, she just won an Emmy! You’d have to be really, really stupid to get rid of the only actor on your show to even be nominated for an award.
I totally understand your fear, especially since we see Annalise literally dying in the flashforwards, but remember, she’s dying, not dead like Sam was (or like the ADA is). My guess – she’s going to survive (either just because she’s a badass, or because the kids save her life, or because Frank rescues her) and the second half of season two, or season three, is going to be her solving the case of who attempted to murder her, and then murdering them. Which I am REALLY looking forward to :)
Yeah. I mean, logically I know like that’s most likely true. But also I kinda feel like they’re setting up for wes to sorta take over for her and make a schism with the students Frank and Bonnie.
Oh god, I really hope not. Her and Wes getting so close is disturbing, for sure, but it seems to me he’s more likely going to replace Frank. Like, when Annalise finds out Frank killed Lila, I can see her firing (or murdering) him and hiring Wes full-time.
Well, there’s also the whole thing with Bonnie, I really want to know what happened. I’m guessing a scandal-esque saving from abuse thing. But the rift is totally set up with everyone’s loyalty split between Frank Bonnie and wes… Don’t know, I hope I’m wrong. Wes kinda annoys me honestly.
HOW TO GET AWAY WITH KISSIN LADIES
I hope we get to meet Callie’s new gal pal soon! And that this doesn’t become a weird love triangle that eventually pushes Callie and Arizona back together. As much as I adore Calzona because they were the first queer couple on a tv show that I watch religiously (well there was Hahn, but that didn’t really last enough for them to be a couple), the levels of jealousy and spite in that relationship from the very beginning always freaked me out. I still remember Arizona being like “if you ever sleep with anyone else again, I’ll kill you!” to Callie when they got back together post-Sloan baby. Jealousy bugs me in general, but that particular expression of it was kinda awful.
Oh man, I miss Hahn… Damn parking lot of no return
And I miss Cristina but I haven’t missed Derek so far
Agreed on all counts. I miss Derek negative amounts.
Ugh, unintentional rhyming.
We could rap about Greys Anatomy. I bet it will be better than Lucious in Empire.
Yes to Famke Janssen! No to the kissing like an alien part! Maybe I’ll fast-forward that part..
If we learned anything from that last episode of Carmilla is that nobody stays dead.