Hey Pisces, how you doing? I hope the recent solar eclipse in your sign treated you well. Sorry I’ve been sleeping on you, it’s just that during Pisces season things tend to get famously fuzzy for some of us. This is a feeling you’re probably familiar with. Being ruled by Neptune gives you a reputation for being kindred to altered, dream-like states of reality. I hope you’re living your life like a sweet, magical joy ride instead of a hazy house of mirrors. Be gentle with the rest of us though, because woof, does Pisces energy sure kill me something softly. Did you know that 99.9% of people who have wrecked my heart (and also given me the most magical experiences of my life) are Pisces? But hey, it’s okay, I’ve come to peace with it. It’s not like I based all these looks on my exes for self-therapy or anything, haha, why would I do that? I’m not a Scorpio, I’m a super chill and normal Sagittarius. I’m not even a little sweaty because so many Pisces are reading this right now, haha, what? How you doing? Have I asked that already?
Sorry. I’m back. This is about you, not me.
From a more professional perspective, I’ve found that Pisces is the sign that people least identify with. They’re like: “who is this dreamy space cadet you’re describing? Not me, I say!” And I hear you. It’s true, Pisces always seem more like their Moon or Rising Sign. So what exactly is the je ne sais quoi that you all share? Well, as an expert on all things “why do Pisces keep ruining me on accident,” I’ve done a lot of google searches on the subject and I’m happy to tell you that I’ve figured it out. Here’s the thing: you’re an actual star walking on this earth. In fact, if ever you’ve heard a non-Pisces make the claim that we’re all “made of stardust,” you might be entitled to compensation. Because no other sign can do what you do.
Do you know that you have some kind of magical ability, but zero idea how any of it works? For example, have you ever walked into a room and elevated the good vibes of everyone in the space, like adjusting the temperature on a psychic thermostat? Or do you know for a fact that someone else’s best memories happened because of your secret ability to orchestrate magical situations? Or when you look at stars, do you sometimes speak to them as equals, like: “this place is so wild y’all, I’ll give you all the gossip when I get back.” If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may understand why people are so attracted to you. It’s not your fault that people are trying to commune with the stars. But it’s okay if you break some hearts in the process, because being stardust doesn’t come with a manual. However, if any of you happen to write that manual, I for one would pre-order the shit out of it.
Also, standard disclaimer: I did my best to create a balanced presentation for different genders, but if you’re personally sad with the representation of your gender identity, I encourage you to choose one item from any of the collages and pair it with the fashion that’s already in your closet.
The thing about being a Pisces is that no matter what you’re wearing, you’re always draped in an invisible cloak that reflects back the stars. Your magnetism has nothing to do with what you wear. You know it, I know it, and I assure you that a Leo somewhere is seething with jealous rage about it. You can pull off a burlap sack like it’s a hand-tailored Chanel suit. But despite this, most of you are, very, very good with clothes. Your magic trick is minimalism. It’s like you wake up and say: “how can I wear a maximum of three comfortable items today, and still look very, very good?” And honestly, bravo. I don’t know how you do it, but it’s truly a gift.
You can also style shapeshift better than anyone. Most people can manage to curate one solid look, but you have the freedom to pull off a new style every day. This look is called “Pisces pretends to be a Leo,” and tbh you’re going to get away with it. Your tinder date will guess you’re a Leo, and somewhere an actual lion will angrily swat a fly away from his mane. You know, synchronicity. You get it.
Something that reminds me of Pisces is the way that different textures evoke different feelings. Not to get all Kanye Season 5 on you, but seriously: have you ever thought about wearing something just because of how it feels? I think pairing your inner emotional state with how an item of clothing physically feels would amplify your magic somehow. And look at all of these textures to choose from – denim, velvet, silk. Isn’t that neat, your collection is complete.
Some of you downplay your magic with your clothing, like “nothing to see here, I’m not an alien, just a casual human in a tank top.” But some of you are full-on, “I dropped from the sky and bitch I might come in peace.” Godspeed to the mortals who encounter you, because Heaven hath no fury like a Pisces dressed like a femme dream. For your next opportunity to dress fancy, it might be worth it to play with the drop-dead devastating combination of tulle and off-the-shoulder sleeves. Ask yourself: “if I wear this, will it cause people to evaporate?” And don’t wait to answer yourself, because the answer is yes.