35 Spectacular Ways You Described Yourself When Signing Up For A-Camp

feature image by molly adams, taken at a-camp 7.0

A-Camp 7.5: Midwest Takeover is less than a month away and we are SO FREAKING EXCITED. Like, A-Camp 1.0 excited. If you’re joining us, we can’t wait to meet you. If you’re not, you should! We know there used to be a waitlist and that was probably a huge bummer but spots have opened up since then so there is still hope to turn it all around. You can sign up right here, right now.

Reading through your descriptions of yourselves was absolutely thrilling. We’ve got a super-diverse group this time, including a solid chunk of newly-out folks whose heads are about to explode! I can’t wait to meet you weirdos.

1. I can’t see over the tops of fridges, and I’ve watched Mean Girls about a thousand times. Sometimes, I eat an embarrassing amount of shrimp at dinner parties.

2. Someone once told me that hanging out with me is “like all the good things about smoking pot,” which is by far my favorite compliment I’ve ever received!

3. My dream celebrity girl squad would be: Sara Quin, Rihanna, Serena Williams, Michelle Obama, and Rachel Maddow.

4. Heavily influenced by Rachel Maddow and Hermione Granger.

5. Will be best friends with anyone who will let me show them pictures of my dog

6. Queer black nerd who loves cats, whiskey and trashy tv and aspires to be a kitchen witch.

7. I’m very cat-like I think!

8. Butch with boobs

9. A delightful combination of glam and lumberjack.

10. My L Word character would be Bette with a big dose of Dana awkwardness.

11. I’m living independently in NYC. Autocorrect tried to make that “indecently.” That would have been an entirely different About Me.

12. I’m a cartoonist and illustrator living in Chicago making art about mermaids, the ocean, crushing loneliness, people in the woods, and sex.

13. I aspire to open a queer worker-co-op country bar.

14. I love my dog more than anything. I also love snacks and sharing those snacks with my dog. If I am not slingin’ makeup I’m probably in bed with my dog.

15. Slightly prissy femme stoner.

16. My favorite part of the day is when my workfriend and I water our garden of misfit office plants together — I find their will to live really inspiring.

17. I’m on day 8 of Whole30 + would kick a puppy for a doughnut.

18. Yes, you can eat my dead body if we’re in a Donner Party situation.

19. I’m an absurd Latinx coconut that thinks everything is a joke especially life.

20. I hate injustice, and also lightning, because of this one time I got struck in the face by lightning.

21. Hufflepuff primary. Hufflepuff secondary.

22. Always the one who wanted to stay up talking later at sleepovers (don’t know if bc crush on straight friends, or bc I’m trash for late night philosophizing. Either way, relevant)

23. I like hiking, Wisconsin, and self-identified weirdos.

24. I don’t like ketchup.

25. My deepest secret is that I want the contestants on the Bachelor and Bachelorette to find true love.

26. I am a girl who likes girls (bisexual, lesbian, idk) and loves to laugh, be goofy and make super corny jokes that no-one thinks are funny.

27. Hey! I love guacamole.

28. I love a good talk about how Kim K is a boss.

29. Perpetually single (not by choice), with a
 deep love for anything to do with comics and anime. I’d like to think the two aren’t related.

30. I’m a big friendly giant.

31. I like to think I’m more punk rock than I probably am.

32. fangirl of Kristin Russo tbh.

33. Once I got to feed a dolphin and I cried tears of joy

34. I both look and act like Pearl from Steven Universe.

35. Autostraddle was a big part of coming out to myself, never thought I’d be attending a camp myself. DREAMS DO COME TRUE.

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Riese is the 41-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3228 articles for us.


  1. I’m so happy for number 35!
    And also would be friends with number 5. I bet your dog is adorable.

    • I am number 5 and she is adorable! You can see my profile picture for proof ;) though she looks like the biggest dork ever in that picture…probably because I forced her to wear bunny ears

      • she definitely doesn’t look like she approves of the bunny ears! haa but JUST LOOK AT THAT SWEET FACE!

  2. So does that mean that we are getting the recamps of last camp before A-camp Midwest edition starts?

  3. Best of luck to number 6 on their journey to kitchen witchery. (9 times out of 10 if you want to be a kitchen witch u already are one.)

    Also small moment of admiration for the honesty of number 24.

  4. So excited to be friends with all of you, but definitely need to see #5’s entire dog slideshow while #26 tells me corny jokes; thanks in advance.

    • #5 here, I’ll show you pictures of my dog if you promise to show me pictures of that beautiful donkey in your profile picture

  5. Wait, who is “I’m a cartoonist and illustrator living in Chicago making art about mermaids, the ocean, crushing loneliness, people in the woods, and sex.”?????

    Why are we not best friends already?? I am a comics journalist living in Chicago.

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