20 Getting-To-Know You Questions for Riding In Cars With Girls

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Soon, queer women around the country will begin piling in cars together to make their pilgrimage to The Mountain for A-Camp. Many of these queer women will never have met before. Getting to know someone in-person, without the luxury of a backspace button and time to think about how to answer a question in the chillest possible way, can be daunting — but don’t worry! We’re here to help! Below are 20 icebreaker questions to help you get to know your soon-to-be dear friends.


1. Which Hogwarts house are you in?

2. Would you rather read a paper book or a book on a Kindle?

3. Can you change a tire? Can anyone in this car change a tire?

4. Do you usually prefer to go out at night or stay in?

5. Where would you like to travel that you’ve never been?

6. What do you think schools should be required to teach that they’re not currently required to teach?

7. What’s the best taco you’ve ever had?

8. Would you rather be twice as smart or twice as happy?

9. Who do you think is the most dateable fictional character?

10. What story do your friends tell about you that you wish they’d forget?

11. What’s your dream Jeopardy category?

12. Would you rather have the ability to fly or be a mind-reader?

13. If you had to be in your pajamas all day or a suit/fancy dress all day, which would you choose?

14. What’s your desert island album?

15. Do you believe in “The One”?

16. Have you ever stopped reading a book in the middle and never picked it back up again?

17. What’s one of your major deal-breakers?

18. What is the greatest cereal ever created?

19. Which website do you spend the most time on?

20. What’s the last video you watched on YouTube? (Tell the truth!)

Heather Hogan is an Autostraddle managing editor who lives in New York City with her partner, Stacy, and their cackle of rescued pets. She's a member of the Television Critics Association, the Gay and Lesbian Entertainment Critics Association, and a Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer critic. You can also find her on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

Heather has written 872 articles for us.

42 Comments

  1. These should be part of a survey I love them. Plus, I’m curious as to how many of us are in the same house and/or agree on cereal. I have no idea why I feel like this could be important lol.

    • Wow I had never thought of this possibility, but now that I read it, it’s totally what would happen to me to!

      I’d probably pick Ravenclaw because being smart is rated higher in society and at 11 I’d still be influenced by that, even though I’m pretty sure I’d get halfway through my Hogwarts education and regret my decision because really the traits I most like about my self are my loyalty and hard work and all the other Hufflepuff qualities…

      I now say Hufflepuff when people ask though 🙂

  2. Also want to add that last year I had 2 people in my car I didnt know going and coming from camp. They also didnt know each other. It was one of the greatest things I couldve done before camp. It was nice to know I knew at least 2 people already because it was my first camp and because Tory had been to every single camp before we didnt get lost yay!!

  3. These are such a great collection of questions! I have a stack of get-to-know-you question flashcards for new friends or long trips — going to add these questions to my stack now!

  4. The questions where I must pick ONE TO RULE THEM ALL kill me. I’m a lifelong can’t-choose-don’t-make-me-choose-er. ONE album? I can pick three, maybe, but just one? Cruel.

    There needs to be a sex toy Jeopardy category. Or an entire game of many sex toy categories.

    And masturbation should be taught. They should talk about the clitoris, too.

  5. y’all, I already compiled 271 questions (and counting) to get to know the humans I am riding with/future cabinmates/anyone willing to answer them! glad that we are ONCE AGAIN in sync, straddleverse

  6. Omg I love all of these and I want to print them all out for my next road trip.

    P.S. My Jeopardy subject would be “lesbians in popular media” OBVIOUSLY.

    P.P.S. Changing a tire is so much harder than it looks on TV.

  7. okay this is a gr8 list which I really appreciate because I am hosting a queer mixer soon (in L.A., the Sunday immediately post-camp, which any mountain stragglers still in town should attend, it’s called Rainbow Fish and we have choose-your-pronoun name tags AHEM) and I always struggle so much with the questions for the speed mingling so THANK YOU FOR THIS POST and know that its gay half-life extends far beyond A-Camp <3

  8. Oh but you totally missed out asking their sign! That’s one of the first things I ask when I meet people. And then after an acceptable length of time, their exact date/time/place of birth so I can look at their birth chart. Just to see if we’d make good friends. That’s normal, right?

  9. The only answers I am universally interested in are to the following questions: “what is your beauty regimen?” and “when was the last time you were in a fight?”. I imagine it’s what I would ask all my subjects if my job was to interview people.

  10. Never ask a Ravenclaw what new subjects schools should be required to teach unless you want them to spend the rest of the car ride explaining how to completely reinvent the American education system, complete with supporting research and source citations.

    • 1) Pottermore says Gryffindor
      2) Paper book
      3) Theoretically
      4) Stay in
      5) Let me get back to you on that one
      6) Evolution. They should be REQUIRED to teach evolution
      7) er….
      8) If I was twice I as smart, I’d be very smart. If I was twice as happy, I wouldn’t be very happy.
      9) If I wasn’t 38 I would say Hermione
      10) It’s been a long time since I’ve had friends
      11) The Cthulhu Mythos
      12) Fly
      13) Pajamas
      14) Helloween – Keeper of the Seven Keys part II
      15) Yes, but I haven’t been able to find her…yet.
      16) Yep. First book in the “Sword of Truth” series
      17) People with nails chewed down to the nub. I can’t stand that
      18) Cocoa Pebbles
      19) TheMarySue.com
      20) Grasscut – The Lights

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