What We Love and Hate About Dating Geminis

For those who believe in it, astrology can be a powerful tool for introspection and self-knowledge — or you can use it to talk shit about your ex and obsess over your crush. Journey with us as we do both, and then head to the comments to live your truth.

Vanessa Friedman, Community Editor

Geminis are like clouds. Make of that what you will.

Archie Bongiovanni, Cartoonist

Lots of direct eye contact (is that a positive? a negative? you decide).

Drew Burnett Gregory, Senior Editor

I love Geminis, to be honest. It’s less that the stereotypes towards them are false and more that I’ve found Geminis’ specific brand of confusing, drive-my-Capricorn-ass-crazy behavior to be more honest. Let’s face it. Most people are a bit two-faced. Geminis are actually upfront about their two-facedness and I appreciate it!

Ari , Writer

As a Gemini, every time I’ve dated a Gemini I realize why people hate us.

Stef Schwartz, Vapid Fluff Editor

HARD NO. A majority of my major heartbreaks have been caused by Geminis, to the point where I will literally walk out on a first date if someone cops to being a goddamn Gemini. As a Scorpio, I am very obsessively focused and intense; I need to know exactly where I stand with my partner and I will let them know constantly. A flaky, mercurial air sign is exactly the perfect recipe to drive a Scorpio nuts. I have a lot of friends who are Geminis and are perfectly acceptable human beings, but I would never date them in a million years. NEVER AGAIN.

Ryan Yates, Writer

Some of my favourite exes are Geminis.

Rachel Kincaid, Former Managing Editor

Well, full disclosure I divorced one somewhat recently, so my impressions are not the most positive. I have dated in varying levels of seriousness and commitment two Geminis, and both of them were charming, creative, very fun, great to party with, and also completely chaotic and inconsistent. Geminis are like if an Irish goodbye was a person. In my experience they were totally unreliable as partners — not in the way where they were deliberately flaky, but because they truly didn’t know themselves what they wanted or could commit to, or would change their mind about it 10 minutes later. My thing is always that I can make anything work as long as you’re honest and clear about it, and god bless those Geminis’ hearts, they are truly incapable of doing that!

I still find Geminis very fun and cool as friends — y’all are very smart and you’re a great time! — but will be taking a pass on dating them.

Positive: will come up with the coolest and most random shit to do, super fun and creative, very good at a party, sex can be pretty fun.

Negative: literally need a diagram to explain a very simple point, they get caught up on everything and nothing at the same time and expect you to follow through that process? They’re so unclear in their communication you cannot trust anything they say at the end of the day because they will inevitably not be accountable for anything they said and take you on another road to avoid the first point, which makes it so difficult to communicate.

Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya, Managing Editor

As a Gemini, any time I have gotten involved with a Gemini, it just doesn’t really work out. That’s just a lotta chaotic energy bouncing off each other all at once.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

the team

auto has written 730 articles for us.


  1. The only gemini I know is my mother. I love her to bits but I couldn’t handle another let alone date one. Oh, and I had to google Irish goodbye … turns out it’s the equivalent to a Polish or French exit in German.

  2. Can’t stop at just gemini, gotta get the info on those rising signs. But I get avoidance because of previous experience. That’s why I run from women named Kate (in real life, Batwoman doesn’t count).

  3. Hello, happy to report that my wife is a Gemini and she is the most committed, upfront, reliable person ever.

    From the information I’ve gathered here I have come to the conclusion that I, a Pisces, might in fact be the cliché Gemini in our relationship.

    • That’s funny that you say that, because I’m currently married to a Taurus woman (I am a Gemini myself) and my Taurus is much more Gemini-like than myself! I’m more down to earth and the homebody in the relationship while she’s the one who can change her mood and feelings every 10 minutes. She also gets restless and bored really easy. So idk how true all this astrology stuff is anyways, just my two cents.

    • ….. I just realized I do this often enough that I should feel called out, but am strangely okay with that.

  4. Proud Gemini here. We invented parties and the double-ended dildo so keep sipping that Hatorade

  5. Same, my girlfriend is a Gemini and straight up and “💯” about everything. I’m a Taurus and probably ruining her life because of how unsure I am, I’m probably the “cliche Gemini” in this relationship as well ><

    • Same! I am a Gemini married to a Taurus who first off aren’t even technically a “good” match. Which I completely disagree with. Anyways, she’s way more the life of the party and the “cliche Gemini” in my relationship as well.

  6. Alternatively,

    Pros: Never boring, will make you do a million cool new things you’d never try on your own, can talk about anything, multi-faceted, multi-talented, the most bisexual sign, makes you feel less bad about flaking if you also need to do it!

    xoxo #1 gemini defender

  7. I dated a Gemini once who didn’t actually want to date me, his Mom just liked me a lot.

    I’ll be honest, there was more than one problem with that scenario.

  8. One of my very best friends is a Gemini and they have done a ton of work on themself and are literally the most dependable and steady person in my life. Almost every other Gemini I have met so far is sadly quite flaky and chaotic. I have a Gemini moon so I understand. No matter what the sign, what tends to matter more is if someone is a good person at the core and has done a lot of therapy (or other more accessible self-awareness-building things).

  9. Geminis I know have been very considerate and thoughtful.

    Full of thoughts and they will consider everything, and then consider it some more.

  10. I’m a gemini, but don’t really believe in astrology.

    > “literally need a diagram to explain a very simple point, they get caught up on everything and nothing at the same time and expect you to follow through that process?”

    As someone with ADHD I however still feel called out…

  11. love my gemini girlfriend but to be fair i am a sagittarius and i’m probably chaotic enough for the both of us

  12. “In my experience they were totally unreliable as partners — not in the way where they were deliberately flaky, but because they truly didn’t know themselves what they wanted or could commit to, or would change their mind about it 10 minutes later.”

    I mean, I WANT to be offended, but it would kind of be like being offended by someone saying, “Oh, I see you’re wearing a grey hat today.” It’s just facts.

  13. aw sad, i think i’m a lovely gemini to date. but here i am with a taurus moon and aries venus, so maybe that’s what balances it all out ;)

  14. If I’m flakey it’s more to do with my adhd (and cfs) than being a Gemini. Tho my internalized biphobia is telling me it’s because I’m bisexual. What’s the difference? I’ve spent a lifetime of folk being biphobic, and a lifetime being part of the most hated star sign (including a childhood spent reading my Nan’s horoscope books where the author hated Gemini’s with a vicious passion) and the two feel very similar to me. As an introvert I’m not even that good at parties and conversation. Yours, undatable Gemini.

  15. I may be the personification of an Irish goodbye but it’s just because I really did consider all of my options re:actual goodbyes and decided that the people who would care didn’t matter that much, and the people who matter wouldn’t care.

    We can be really good communicators! Sometimes you just need to ASK us what we’re thinking because we spend so much time analyzing that we forget we never said it out loud.

    -Bisexual, INTJ, Gemini

  16. Such a shame people misunderstand the Gemini !! We are the communicators of the zodiac ( the intelligent sign ) To us life is not all about stigma and tradition …..few can keep up with our energy! We are very loyal …taken for granted for our kindness too often and not appreciated for our minds ! We don’t care about how intense sex is or how to cook a good meal to impress everyone ….we care about people …the world ….and the bigger picture ….we are the the string that holds the matrix together !! We also love deep and with hard …so if you are too shallow to take time to understand us !! Try again 💜

Comments are closed.