Well paint a map on my abs and call me In The Pink, we’re going to the races! Also, Bette’s planning a big dinner party, Paige and Shane are super into storytelling and green ice cream, Tina gets a boner for Kate Arden who by the way made a wonderful film called Pandora, Jodi wears a tiny vest over a big shirt and Papi wears a baggy vest over no shirt, Max takes a terrible rip back home for a funeral because this show simply has NO MERCY.
Carly: “We’re doing something that lesbians love to do in television and film, which is draw on each other’s torsos.”
Riese: “Did you notice Barbara Bush was still in there.”
Carly: “Yeah she was like LOOMING in the background. I was gonna say staring at us but she’s blindfolded, so. She’s just sort of hovering in a very uh, menacing and disturbing and distracting kind of way.”
Carly: “One thing I would like to point out is that Max’s sister is NOT played by Taryn Manning. Because if you’re like me, that scene started and you thought… “is that Taryn Manning?”
Riese: “I thought ‘is she wearing a wig?’ Because her hair was so specifically askew, it seemed like they were like “what do people outside of LA do their hair like? What do the country people do in the wilds of Illinois?”
Riese: Back in los angeles california, Paige is wearing a hat.
Carly: Paige is wearing a truly unfortunate hat. This hat should be illegal.
Riese: I think she found it on the set of The Parent Trap set in 1956.
Carly: We’re having ice cream breakfast. I thought it was gelato.
Riese: Shane put on a blazer.
Carly: Shane put on a blazer to go to breakfast. That’s…. sure. It looks like they’re in little gelato cups.
Riese: Yeah cuz, green apple gelato?
Max gets the charm bracelet
Riese: “Also is he growing out a beard or is he shaving? He needs to pick one. It’s gross enough that he’s just walking around.”
Carly: Papi is wearing a sweater vest without anything under it. Well maybe like a tank or something, like a cami.
Riese: Maybe a camisole.
Carly: I used to wear sweater vests when they were really popular, during this time, and once I wore one with a t-shirt under it and thought I was like, fucking edgy.”
Carly: Helena and Catherine have a suitcase with 100,000 of cash in it. Because they are in a different movie.
Carly: Tasha runs into a guy that she knows from the military and she gets super worried that he’s gonna know that she’s queer because she is with a bunch of obviously queer people who are all behaving ridiculously
Riese: Helena and Catherine walk by and are holding hands and they kiss
Riese: Tasha looks up and sees them having very public skybox sex and is like, oh my god, horrified.
Riese: And then she stuffs the seating chart up Bette’s hoo-ha.
Riese: It is the standard trope of the person standing away from the funeral who doesn’t feel like they can be at the funeral hiding behind a tree and even though the entire graveyard is empty except for the funeral party nobody ever notices.”
Carly: “Kate bought a very large amount of tequila”
Riese: What? They say you can tell gay girls vs straight girls because gay girls look at their nails basically palms up and fingers in, which isn’t true!
Riese: “It turns out that Jodi is wearing a tiny little vest AND A GIANT SHIRT!”
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Riese is the 40-year-old Co-Founder and CEO of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in California. Her work has appeared in nine books including "The Bigger the Better The Tighter The Sweater: 21 Funny Women on Beauty, Body Image & Other Hazards Of Being Female," magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. Follow her on twitter and instagram.
Riese has written 3036 articles for us.
Yaaay, you’re back!!!!!!!! 🌈
I also thought that was Taryn Manning
Also, I grew up wanting a horse and I’m a lesbian
Three things, in order of silliest to most serious:
1) If Jenny did have a monkey in the cold open, it would truly be a BANANAS scene.
2. I, like Carly, wanted a dog, moose and penguin as pets more than either a horse or a monkey.
3. All throughout Max’s mother’s funeral storyline, I kept thinking about a similar scene in season 1 of Pose. In Pose, Blanca has her whole chosen family–her children–with her to help her through the painful encounters she has with some of her family of origin. And in the end, Blanca does get an inheritance that is significant not only to her, but to her future generations.
If Max had his friends around him, if he was actually able to be at the grave site, and if what he got from his mother became a part of his new life, I think some of the horrible family stuff would have been easier to bear.
In other words, if The L Word had even a bit of the love and compassion Pose has for Blanca (and MJ Rodriguez herself) then his more difficult storylines would feel more like character development and less like weird tacit punishment.
To be fair, I am a cis person who is close to her family of origin, so I can’t speak to what this experience would actually be like! This was just how I’ve felt as a viewer of both shows.
yes!!! pose for sure showed how that kind of thing can be done RIGHT
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