The 100 Gayest Places You’ve Had Sex

On our massive Lesbian Sex Survey (open to all women who have sex with other women) we asked you “what is the weirdest place you’ve had sex?” and nearly 7,000 of you gave us the details on your experiences in dressing rooms, bathrooms, parking lots and wooded areas all over the universe!

While putting together a listling of the weirdest places you’ve had sex and compiling numbers about where you’ve had sex for a post devoted to that topic, I gradually realized another listling opportunity was right there in my open fists — the queerest, gayest, most yes homo, most yes queen, most super-special-snowflake places you’ve gotten it on. Shall we?

The 100 Gayest Places You’ve Had Sex

1. In the crowd at a Pride Festival

2. The back of a Jeep next to a beaver pond. That’s right. Beaver. Pond. A pond with an entire family of beavers in it.

3. The back of a U-Haul. It was not in motion.

4. In front of the Smith College Library in a hurricane

5. My ex-boyfriend’s house with my new girlfriend

6. A nunnery tower

7. The can yard at a recycling plant

8. The office of LGBT Affairs

9. On a table filled with crafts….at A-Camp

10. An open field during a folk festival

11. In an upstairs room at the SPCA after looking at puppies with my girlfriend

12. A busy supermarket parking lot near our donor’s house — the fresher the sperm the better right?

13. The shed of our community garden

14. In my ex-girlfriend’s bed, but not with her…

15. The back of a Prius on Mt. Feelings

16. Home Depot

17. The Hampshire College Senior Project Platform Treehouse

18. Army Boot Camp female showers in Afghanistan

19. Finney Chapel, Oberlin College

20. An alcove of an apartment building on Castro Street in San Francisco

21. On the floor of a rave while doing tantric yoga

22. In the bush

23. My college’s Gay-Straight Alliance office

24. In my sorority house. With my sorority sister. During initiation.

25. Girlfriend’s parents’ closet (and we were both in the closet at the time so that’s why it was weird)

26. In a stairwell of a co-op house

27. In the middle of a rugby pitch at night

28. Under an apple tree next to a carpark full of nuns

29. At a Miley Cyrus concert

30. In a jail cell while visiting my girlfriend (she’s a cop)

31. The Mount Holyoke Amphitheater and several places in the library

32. IKEA

33. During The Rocky Horror Picture Show (“Toucha Toucha Touch Me”)

34. The Catholic liturgy section (surprisingly unintentional) of Neilson Library at Smith College.

35. On the ferry to Fire Island

36. In the pit at an Otep show

37. On the conference table of The Seattle Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce with a girl I’d just met.

38. When we were on our way to Brighton she pulled up in a car park which had “dyke” in the name. It had to be done.

39. Pitchers mound on a baseball diamond at a softball tournament

40. The basement of a bike shop

41. Underneath a table (the pulpit) in a chapel. Specifically, the chapel belonging to my former All-Girls Catholic middle school.

42. Against a fence outside of the Wildrose in Seattle

43. In a cob house built on a queer farm with a straight girl

44. On a bus surrounded by people on the way to a protest

45. Burning Man strap-on-a-thon

46. While riding a power sander at a job site

47. Her boyfriend’s house

48. Bathroom stall at a 90’s prom after asking her into the stall “to borrow a tampon”

49. The back of a Suburu Forester

50. Girl Scout Camp on the grounds of a Catholic Church

51. The bathroom of a homophobic cult/restaurant

52. Klub Deer

53. In the bed of her ex’s truck

54. In a memorial garden under a statue of the Virgin Mary. If I wasn’t already on the way to hell…

55. In the bathroom at Stonewall Inn

56. My front garden (that’s not an euphemism btw)

57. Dolly Parton concert, while sitting in the audience

58. A gender-neutral bathroom in my college’s science building

59. The bathroom at the Lex? Jk everyone has sex there

60. Second-hand bookstore, amongst a collection of vintage women’s weekly magazines

61. In the front row of a Broadway show

62. On my Women’s Studies professor’s desk (not with her)

63. In a dressing room while prom dress shopping with my girlfriend at the time

64. In a bookstore in downtown Montreal

65. The bathroom of a lesbian-friendly Strip Club

66. At a Pagan shrine in Ireland

67. In a very small very messy bathroom with a cat nearby and parents in the other room with no lock on the door

68. Walk-in cooler at a vegan restaurant

69. A tent at Coachella

70. Dolores Park

71. On a ranch, in the homophobic ranch owners shower

72. UCLA’s botanical gardens

73. Library of Congress subclass HQ, 4th floor, Mudd Library, Oberlin College. Ohio is a pretty weird place in general to have sex.

74. The breastfeeding room at the mall

75. In a yurt tent in the French Haut-Savoie

76. Rodeo bathroom stall

77. On route 17 driving from Santa Cruz back to SF. She was driving with one hand down my cutoff shorts. SO DANGEROUS and SO HOT. And completely successful might I add.

78. The photo booth at a gay bar

79. Back seat of my car in the parking lot of a sports bar during a Denver Broncos game

80. On a charter bus full of Rollergirls

81. I’ve had so much sex in the woods/outdoors that I no longer consider it a weird way to have sex….. shout out to A-Camp, yo.

82. In the office of the LGBT group I belonged to in college

83. Club bathroom at The Crib in San Francisco! Oh, to be wasted, underage, and unapologetic.

84. On top of a climbing tower, wearing harnesses

85. On the sidewalk in Palm Springs, in the middle of the day. Sober.

86. The Women’s Resource Center

87. On a yoga mat, outside

88. Standing up against the back wall of a small unlit stage in the middle of the playa during Burning Man… while someone apparently circled around on a bike

89. In/on a tractor…yeehaw y’all!

90. In the backseat of a mini-van at Lilith Fair

91. On a moving motorcycle, while dressed as Buzz Lightyear (gogo boots, green and purple tutus, and blow up wings), being fingered alternately by the driver and another who kept pace beside us on our way home from a strip club in Key West.

92. On a golf course

93. Dont laugh: a fishmonger.

94. The YWCA Parking Lot

95. In the stands of a racetrack while a horse race was happening

96. In a closet (We barely got through it, we were laughing too damn hard)

97. On a public sidewalk during a punk rock block party all day festival

98. Inside a confessional at St. Patrick’s Cathedral

99. In a classroom at UC Berkeley

100. In the car at a drive in. At a Harry Potter movie. The shame.

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Riese is the 41-year-old Co-Founder of as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

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  1. 102. At Bad Feelings Camp, with a porn director, to drown out the people outside our tent having a conversation about why/why not the festival’s policy was a good thing. (She’s written about it, I figure it’s time to go public.)


    seriously I can’t stop thinking about how they accomplished this

      • Highway 17 between Santa Cruz and Los Gatos is a steep and very curvy mountain road, with the added bonus of heavy traffic and large trucks, for anyone who hasn’t had the pleasure. Though I did once eat a burrito with extra guacamole while driving home over 17 (NOTE this is dangerous and very stupid, don’t do this, even without the extra guac), so I’m not surprised to hear someone had sex while navigating it, either.

    • auuuugh, I’m afraid I know who wrote this one. . .because I’ve done that, too.

      pardon me while I cross myself and hope I’m wrong.

  3. Some of these sound like the plot those cheese porn sites marketed to straight dudes. Specifically #24, which I am pretty sure is a plot to almost every porn featuring a sorority and lesbians in it.

    I’m curious to know more about #45 though.

  4. I once had a lesbian fivesome in the mens bathroom of a gay bar…it was a night.

    • One must not pun on Harry Potter, therefore I shall not comment on any goblets being on fire in the given context of this post.
      Also, a Chamber of Secrets joke would be entirely uncalled for and shall thus not be entertained.

  5. 1. Driving back to my mom’s/in the driveway of my mom’s after friday night of Dinah 2008.(she lives near Palm Springs)
    2. Day off camping as a staff member of a GS camp.
    3. On a side street about a block away from Toucan’s (gay bar) in Palm Springs.

    • GS Camp=GAY SEX CAMP?!

      I had my queer awakening there, and two of the women I worked with are about to marry each other, so clearly there’s something in the cookies…

    • Girl Scout camp=gay sex camp.

      There’s something in the cookies, absolutely.

      I went to camp thinking I was straight, and now I am a 10 year staff member and commenting on autostraddle.

      • Of course, there is something in those cookies. How else to explain why we keep buying them? I have been trying to tell people they have been putting crack in that shit for years now. No, I don’t need half a dozen boxes of Tagalongs but I’m going to buy them anyway because crack. That’s why.

      • Aw, this Gay Scout camp thread cracks me up. I had my gay awakening at GS camp. The following summer I “awakened” the lifeguard. ;)

        I now work full time at a GS Council and am dating the camp director. Recent comments include:

        “Shit I think I hired too many queer girls this year. There’s gonna be dramaaa!”

        “I wonder who her fling is gonna be this year. It can’t be the same girl as last year, she’s her supervisor heh heh heh”


        • In my past job, there would be about 10ish queer girls every summer. Last summer I moved to a new camp where I was the only one. Everyone got along, no one hooked up, there was zero drama. I was beside myself-the camp was great, but time off was SO BORING.

          • Working at Camp, even GS day camp, played a HUGE role in me recognizing and coming to terms with my gayness. First Pride (SF) was with co-counselors. First kiss-lakeside with one of the Camp America staff from Oz. It was the best of times.

  6. yeahhhhh Five Colleges! Four mentions out of 100 isn’t half bad. And Smith wins with 2 alone ;-) (wins…ties with Oberlin…guess it’s fitting).

    • Also there was a Mount Holyoke one in there somewhere but I’m not sure where it went in the journey from surveymonkey to text-edit document to wordpress. I’m sorry Mount Holyoke person, I bet your sex was really gay!

  7. #61 Front row at a Broadway show

    I need to know what show this was to properly decide if I am appalled or impressed.

    • This was going to be my comment.

      Come on #61 we need this.

      I’ve seen some pretty clandestine sex in my time so I can imagine it being pulled off in many situations.

      If it happens to have been during ‘For Good’ in Wicked I might cry and consider it equally offensive and so beautiful.

      I’m gonna guess it was Book of Mormon, Cabaret or Hedwig…hopefully not Matilda or anything Disney lol. Oh god.

      There’s not enough Broadway talk among queers that aren’t gay male identified. Well, not enough for me at least. Heather mentioned Sutton FOster in a recent tv related article regarding Younger and it made me very happy just to see her name on autostraddle :)

      • I honestly can’t imagine anything but Wicked.
        My bet would be on “Defying Gravity”, though.
        On second thought The Phantom of the Opera, was pretty, uh, atmospheric as well.
        Maybe OKCupid should use that as a matching question:
        “What song from which musical could you imagine yourself having sex to in the front row?”
        Then they could advise against the train wreck bound to happen when “Point of No Return” meets “Hakuna Matata”.

        • The last bit of defying gravity is so lit up though, it lights up the orchestra pit even, first row, first few, are gonna be pretty extra visible. Plus how are you not gonna be distracted. On the OTHER hand, that song builds, and builds and builds AND BUILDS AND BUILDS and then gigantic crescendo. Lights out, quickly house lights up. I dunno, seems like a a difficult number for it to happen – though for those into extra risk, I suppose the perfect number. But again, how would you not be distracted. Esp with all the stops during the first 3/4 of the number. As long as you’re mine def seems like the most likely candidate if one were to go with contextually sexy.

          • Well, it builds, it’s pretty long, there is an inbuilt climax, perfect for Flying Off the Handle and there’s a long and very loud round of applause!
            Also, it’s emotionally riveting. I mean no seat neighbors will tear their eyes from the stage, something that could totally happen during Dancing Through Life (which is also super long).
            P.S.:With some strategically placed winter coats visibility ought’n to be such an issue.
            Elphaba has the lights in her face and everyone else on stage is facing away from the audience.

            I’m wondering if the front rowers went to the stage door after the show.That would be an entirely new level of awkward.

    • my money’s on Spring Awakening

      but maybe I’m just thinking that because when I saw it, we were in the front row and my friend who came with me had slept with one of the cast members and she was really rapt with attention throughout

      • If you were so inclined I would look forward to the very detailed article you would write about that experience. I’m enjoying the fact that you were aware of how rapt she was, obviously you were hyper aware of her rapt it was so strong…you know. Like when someone is maybe being quiet and not really doing anything that external, but you can just feel their intensity.

        There’s so many queer women in musical theatre, esp in NYC, granted more commonly identified as bi/queer/fluid among fewer ‘out’ lesbian identified folk. It’s just not as talked about/noticed as the whole “if you’re a man in musical theatre and you’re NOT gay you’re lying to yourself” hahaha /s ,ugh. (hate that). Still though, theatre is life and watching a woman (or man/otherwise if you’re into whatever) sing and act their goddamned heart out from a few feet away is just…unf. So overpowering I don’t even know who would need sex at a time like that.

    • snaap. the theatre nerd in me is offended that people would rather have sex than watch the show but if it’s like phantom or something, sex is way more interesting. if it’s wicked, i’ll cry. (can we please have a musical theatre discussion open thread or something? i wanna see fun home!)

      • YES!! I wanna see Fun Home sooo bad. Something Rotten though is my number one must see asap! I’m avoiding all the press about it as much as I can but the little blurbs I get here and there are all convincing me it’s going to be a long runner which is amaze! It sounds so great. I def find theatre so stimulating and satisfying myself that I can’t even imagine anything but being glued to whatever show I’m at but different strokes I suppose :)

      • COME TO THE FUN HOME indeed! I saw it in previews at the Public, and y’all, as a lady who is DEDICATING her life to theatre (so I don’t say the following lightly), no show has rocked my world/changed my life more. Representation matters. Fun Home is such an important piece of the musical theatre canon and I’m so glad that it’s moved uptown. I cannot wait to see it on Broadway this summer!

        Also, seconding the idea of a theatre discussion. Specifically, can we talk more about queer women in theatre? I’m the only gay lady in my Midwestern BFA program in Musical Theatre, and sometimes it’s…an experience trying to get people to understand what it’s like being “othered” in an art form that claims to be so inclusive.

    • Same. I work on Broadway and I’m quite impressed.

      Also I was sitting on the front row at a favorite show of mine, and the actress who I happen to have the biggest of boners for just happened to lay down on the stage and play with my hair and caress my face. I’m not saying it was sex, but…goddamn.

  8. Can I just say? I found the crafts table sliiiiiightly too tall for that, y’all are some daring athletes

  9. Just have to add this one: at a cabin on Beaver Creek in Sappho, Washington. I’m not kidding. It’s real.

  10. This list is so good. Not just because there’s a lot of content, but also because I deeply understood why everything mentioned was gay in context.

  11. When I saw the title, I wondered if mine made the list. It did. Fantastic, glad to have contributed to this fabulous and very gay list.

      • No, although I’m curious about that one too. I was the prom dress shopping one. A baby gay discovering one of the many perks of lady-loving.

  12. I go to Oberlin and I really appreciate that there are two direct mentions of Oberlin in here (19 and 73, woo!) and both of them are places that I plan on having sex in at some point. Also 26 and 27 could both be Oberlin as well since co-op houses and gay ruggers are both pretty big commodities here.

    • I still question why her character always pulled me in so much above many others. Maybe it’s the more femme thing I don’t know. So many unanswered questions and lingering feelings :( Was it because I was raised upper middle class? Is that really what I want for my life? Is Helena seduces rich young and middle aged women at horse races going to be IFC’s attempt to compete with OITB? I dunno.

      I just did an AS archive search for IFC and it made me sad :( Though I will say if they ever do bring back The (actual) L , there’s no way Jenny won’t do a mystery tv surprise that didn’t really happen thing. Don’t know what do do with all these feelings right now. I will always remember the basketball game in season 4 as very confusing yet stimulating. Who do you think Helena would’ve gotten it on with if this were real life and not Catherine and not an extra in the season with a million new characters?

      I paused this comment to go back and read your recap of that episode from 2009. Transported me back to the very room i read it it which was the same room i’d just finished watching it in. Queer time travel. Anyway, i’m gonna finish this ramble of a comment with one of many gems from that because i’m lacking any kind of context here really: “Jenny and Catherine two would be PERFECT together. They could totally just manipulate and fuck the shit out of each other until they both went crazy (again).”

  13. Does anyone else see this as some massive game of lesbian sex bingo that they need to play..?

    • Yep, but due to the lack of an American college education,queer office space,or a car for that matter, I feel it wiser to abstain.
      I’ll play when it’s time for the much less glorious “Awkward Moments While Having Sex” Bingo.

  14. IKEA?!?
    Now I’m wondering where. I mean, people even look into the closets,all the time, and it’s usually super crowded.
    And how did #91 (and her partners) not end up falling off the 7 mile bridge??
    Curioser and curioser.

  15. Would the graphic novel/alternative section under the Starbucks of the Barnes & Nobles have made the list or is that too mainstream….

  16. “84. On top of a climbing tower, wearing harnesses”

    I pictured it with THOSE harnesses.

    • me too, then i realized what they were talking about, and then i decided it was still gay

    • Frankly I was just so impressed that they worked around the harnesses…I sold those for years and I can’t imagine the trouser fangling that had to happen to even…just damn…*round of applause* queer climbers!

  17. This the thing I like best about being a lesbian…you can have sex literally anywhere.

  18. I remember reading a Cosmo article at camp with my cabin when we were like 14 about how to have sex on the beach without anyone noticing (“wear a long skirt” is all I remember). At the time it seemed like proof that Cosmo was not a good source for info about reality but now I see we should not have doubted. And I need the gay version. Autostraddle, I would like a how-to guide follow-up article, please.

    • Top Ten Things Needed to Have Sex in Weird (Gay) Places

      1) No fear (naturally or induced by chemicals, your choice)
      2) The ability to climax with out yelling (unless you’re into exhibitionism then shout away my friend!)
      3) Stark terror so massive you just sort of pass on by and through it. (Adrenaline is hot, y’all)
      4) Extremely hot partner(s)
      5) The ability to run away from cops with your trousers/underwear round your ankles
      6) Realizing that most people are really unobservant and even if they do kinda notice they probably will just walk away really fast and pretend they didn’t hear anything.
      7) A willingness to Break and Enter
      8) Nimble fingers and either general flexibility or willingness to ignore twinges and/or rough surfaces against your skin.
      9) A profoundly enlarged sense of the absurd and ironic (punning a strong secondary indicator)
      10) Cruise Control

      3 or more of those ought do it for ya.

  19. Was going through the surveys like playing snap? “Oh look, I have a matching pair (or threesome, or whatever)!”

    You could create the ultimate lesbian hookup chart!! You have SO MUCH POWER AT YOUR FINGERTIPS!

  20. Waffle house at 3:30am with a drunk woman we met earlier at the club. She was under the table between my legs and trying to jerking off my bff next to me as our food was being put on the table. The night ended with rainbow vomit(she had rainbow shots and eggs) in the bathroom and trans woman cum on the floor under our table. So gay!

  21. Oh and another time at Fleetwood Mac concert. It was before they got on stage, the though of Stevie Nicks got both of us hot and we did it in a porta-pod.

  22. Now I’m a little disappointed that I’m not a sex-having person because, yo, I attend a paddle festival that is named “Beaverfest” and that would def make it on this this of gayest places to have sex.

  23. Well apparently the queer side of Ohio has been extremely successful in hiding itself from me for the 20-ish total years I’ve lived here.

    Other than that, I am impressed and appalled and even more impressed

  24. My girlfriend and I go to school together, so bathroom sex isn’t all that uncommon, but we once did it in a Chain Reaction bathroom stall during a Frank Iero concert while simultaneously getting high second hand because the other stall was taken by a bunch of stoners.

  25. In the barracks at Camp Buehring, Kuwait while a soldier on night shift was sleeping.

  26. The high quantity of nuns and Catholicism on this list are why I feel at home on this site.

  27. I really appreciate that not only was Smith College mentioned twice in this list, but that both Smith hookups happened at the library. <3

  28. Girlfriend’s parents’ closet (and we were both in the closet at the time so that’s why it was weird)

    Wait, wait. The *latter* part is what made it weird? lolol

    This was all amazing and so so gay, i love it.

  29. “On a table filled with crafts….at A-Camp”
    I think my cabin mates and I interrupted you guys. Ooops

  30. My friend had sex at a christian camp (that her parents sent her to because she’s gay). With the pastor’s daughter.

    • Does anyone else think that that just screams justice was done? Beware, pastors, if you preach pray away the gay, we’ll seduce your daughters!

  31. Oberlin, represent!!! Two inclusions here make me an extra-proud alumna, though extra sad that I was semi-closeted (and hung up on my straight best friend) while attending, thus missing out on the fabulous queer sexiness all around me.

  32. Hmm let’s see: a confessional in Coimbra Portugal. Driving down the NJ Turnpike. Ah to be young and in love!

  33. The bed of “thee team lesbian” (her words) from my schools volleyball team when I still considered my self to be straight

  34. Today I added: unisex bathroom in granola factory, in Vermont. While wearing my scissoring sweater from the Autostraddle shop.

  35. I keep coming back to this article because seeing that somebody else has also done the crowd at Pride means so much to me

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