Rejoice, Rejoice! Kristen Stewart Will Star in the Lesbian Christmas Rom-Com of Your Wildest Holigay Dreams!

But baby it’s cold outside.

This evening I was snug in my bed like so many Christmas poems, snoozing away under the influence of the sedative my doctor gave me for the small outpatient procedure I had earlier in the day, when lo! An angel of the Lord appeared! And her name was Natalie and she said unto me, “Fear not! For, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. Kristen Stewart will star in Clea DuVall’s lesbian Christmas rom-com.” I startled awake, thinking it was just a holy dream, but upon checking Autostraddle Slack I saw the real-live link that Natalie had pasted right there the TV Team channel.

According to The Hollywood Reporter:

Kristen Stewart is in talks to star in Temple Hill Entertainment and TriStar Pictures’ Happiest Season, a same-sex romantic comedy from director Clea DuVall and writing partner Mary Holland, The Hollywood Reporter has confirmed. Happiest Season portrays a young woman whose plan to propose to her girlfriend while at her family’s annual holiday party is upended when she discovers her partner hasn’t yet come out to her conservative parents.

There are no real details on Happiest Season yet. Variety reported that TriStar had acquired the rights to it back in April when DuVall told them: “Mary [Holland] and I are beyond thrilled… Happiest Season is extremely important to us, and we could not ask for a better team to collaborate with to bring it to the screen.” And Holland said, “Teaming up with Clea to write Happiest Season has been a highlight of my life!”

THIS IS REAL. THIS IS A REAL THING. A REAL LESBIAN CHRISTMAS THING! Oh, how we have suffered endlessly in these cold winter months as Hallmark tells story after story of successful women who reluctantly return home for Christmas and bump into some Will Schuester prick of a lumberjack who convinces them a woman’s ambition is the the enemy of Christmas magic. Well, ho ho ho! Not anymore!

So sip your secular Starbucks peppermint latte, jingle your bells, and make room beside Carol on your DVD shelf: KStew Claus is comin’ to town!

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Heather Hogan

Heather Hogan is an Autostraddle senior editor who lives in New York City with her wife, Stacy, and their cackle of rescued pets. She's a member of the Television Critics Association, GALECA: The Society of LGBTQ Entertainment Critics, and a Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer critic. You can also find her on Twitter and Instagram.

Heather has written 1718 articles for us.

30 Comments

  1. Cate Blanchett: “I dare anyone to make the Yuletide more gay than I did”
    Kristen Stewart: “Hold my beer and my Vans”

  2. Oh, Kristen Stewart, Oh, Kristen Stewart,
    You’re bringing us our queer Christmas rom-com

    You’re starring in our own “While You Were Sleeping”,
    And happy tears, we’ll be weeping

    Oh, Kristen Stewart, Oh, Kristen Stewart,
    You’re bringing us our queer Christmas rom-com

  3. Fuck, I have to find out how Clea DuVall found my personal stash of Kristen Stewart fanfiction.

    Can they please cast only queer people? Jodie Foster as the conservative mom? Or Queen Latifa???

    And maybe a split screen scene to show the different kinds of caroling (singing vs. Cate Blanchett/Rooney Mara action)…stop me now…

  4. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    (Clea DuVall! Making! A! Christmas! Film! Also, apparently it stars K-Stew? Eh.)

  5. When I saw this headline I assumed it must be a parody because this whole concept is just Too Gay To Be True.

    I am racking my brains and I really can’t think of any gayer cultural announcement than this.

  6. Isn’t this just a revamp of the plots of Jenny’s Wedding and Lez Bomb?

    It’s time to drop coming out and pregnancy as the only plot lines lesbians are allowed to have and give us lesbian movies that aren’t solely about the struggles of being gay.

    • You’re not wrong, but maybe it’ll break the genre and make people think they can’t do anything better so they’ll have to move on lol.

      But seriously, I think once younger filmmakers start putting out bigger films, we’ll definitely see a shift.

  7. Omg . Just had to bite my hand.

    dreaming of whatever the 2019 :pushes hair behind ear, sensually: move
    becomes.

  8. I was worried it wouldn’t be perfect until I saw Clea DuVall. I completely trust her with my lesbian holiday movie dreams.

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