Editor’s note: This quiz originally ran in March, but it was broken! It’s fixed now. Enjoy your gender!
Gender is more than identity words and pronouns — it’s objects! More specifically, gender is a series of exactly seven extremely niche inanimate objects. You probably didn’t learn this in your Gender Studies class, and that’s because I made it up. Answer these questions to determine, once and for all, which object best fits your vibe.
Which Inanimate Object Is Actually Your Gender?
Gender is a spectrum ... of inanimate objects.
Yesss, I got the void! It’s so me.
I also got The Void and I’m so happy about it!
Guess we’re all in the void!
That bucket hat looks suspiciously like a bucket hat that I definitely wore all. the. time. as a ~five year old. Love it!
I came here to write almost this exact same set of words regarding a bucket hat and my childhood!
I slept in it. And bathed in it. For three years.
It was denim and had flowers glued to the brim by my grandmother, who knew what was what
It is true I am baby.
Wow, that was unexpectedly intense! I got the Void first, and was like huh, really? But then I took it again and got Roadside Doll Head, and decided nope nope nope, I am the Void, I hope I’m at least related to Janet’s Void, and thus my gender is limitless.
Roadside doll head is 100% accurate this quiz can replace years of therapy* and also explains my obsession with collections old broken dolls from roadside** locations
*do not try this at home
**ebay
It took a second to realize that I had clicked the ad at the bottom and not the submit button. I thought a 2021 Honda Accord from Autotrader was a VERY specific answer to this quiz!
But no, I’m arugula
My partner and I both got a tiny piece of arugula stuck in Tilda Swinton’s teeth. True love, lol.
Apparently both me and my partner are tiny pieces of arugula stuck between Tilda Swinton’s teeth. It feels so right.
I got Tildys Teeth! and I agree.
This quiz was hilarious! I’m a photograph of a stranger’s baby. I somehow find that strangely flattering, lol.
I did not expect the results of this to actually be accurate??? but yes some people like me a LOT and some do not like me and I do enjoy being the center of attention
The Arugula in Tilda’s Teeth description I received is eerily accurate.
10/10 would recommend this quiz as a replacement for all gender-gatekeeping activities, medical, community-based, and otherwise. Looking forward to participating in arugula-only support groups.
The last test I took on this site revealed I am Anne Lister’s boots. Now my gender is “a tiny piece of arugula stuck between Tilda Swinton’s teeth”. I can see where this is coming from but I am starting to feel slightly concerned.
I was kind of grossed out to get arugula stuck in Tulsa Swinton’s teeth but the description is pretty spot on.
“Lucky you! You’re well-situated and elusive. You don’t always let your true self shine, but when you do, strangers can’t help but notice.”
I took it twice, giving a bit different answers each time, and got “void” and “bucket hat”. Frankly I’m not sure either sounds right.
Roadside doll head. Intriguing.
Huh. I took it twice with different answers and got a piece of arugula stuck in Tilda’s teeth both times. I guess I should accept that this is who I am.
I got the Void, which is honestly the most seen I have felt in years sooooo this is accurate!
I positively CACKLED. Buffy season six 4eva!!!
I am the void, the void is me
Roadside Doll Head and I felt an instant cosmic connection in the preview photo. I am at peace.
“A photograph of a stranger’s baby”
Can it be a baby Labrador? OK then.
I was lucky enough to take this back in March when it was posted and just took it again – both times got Bucket Hat. I’m lucky to say that even if my gender expression is ever-shifting, I’m still a constant. (The only constant thing in life is change anyways)
This quiz has scried the mirrored pool of my soul and revealed the dark truth – my gender is Pizza Party Kevin.