My life was changed forever when, as a little girl, I saw Prince Charming slip that perfect-fitting shoe on that beautiful bare foot. I am of course talking about Marty McFly’s self-lacing Nike MAG’s in Back to the Future II. Maybe you had a similar experience where a real shoe on a fictional foot shaped your entire sense of self and fashion. Or maybe you just like quizzes. Either way, here’s one for you.
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Heather Hogan is an Autostraddle senior editor who lives in New York City with her wife, Stacy, and their cackle of rescued pets. She's a member of the Television Critics Association, GALECA: The Society of LGBTQ Entertainment Critics, and a Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer critic. You can also find her on Twitter and Instagram.
Heather has written 1718 articles for us.
1. How are we supposed to choose only one kind of potato???
2. I’m not sure if it was a glitch or intentional, but Mulan was listed twice in the Disney question.
Great quiz!!!
Also I got Barbarella’s boots which is deeply unexpected but not unwelcome!
Mr. Rogers’ comfy sneakers. I wear mostly sneakers so this is spot on!
Ooh! Nakia’s Skull Smashers. Definitely got the stubborn right.
Yes thank you for including Robin Hood as one of the options for favorite Disney Princess, AND including Vienetta, which I am still waiting to see in my local grocery store. I am seen.
Robin Hood was also my favourite Disney “princess” as a child! I wanted to be like him. Strange that I turned out to be queer.
Yass! Laura Dern’s Jurassic Park boots. “Dinosaurs eat man. Woman inherits the earth. :)” I care not for fashion, but love quizzes and this answer!
Big same
Rawr! Anne Lister’s boots!
I felt very seen by this quiz, thank you Heather.
Also, there are two photos of the same bridge! In my head I mentally switched one of them to the Middlesbrough Transporter Bridge and picked that one.
Oh, I meant there was a duplicate sunset, but obviously I am fixated on bridges!
actual best potatoes: the ones from crawfish boils, all spicy on the outside and starchy on the inside
Downright *thrilled* to get Barbarella’s boots.
I got J Lo’s “Hustlers” gold wedge sneakers, which the quiz says means I am always in control which is… not wrong.
Anne Lister’s Boots !
That from now on is my new exclamation.
Anne-Lister’s-Boots, this is a fabulous quiz !
I got Baby’s Keds. Nobody puts you — or your pristine classic sneaks — in a corner.
My Keds are not exactly pristine, but I do love them.
Same here – my keds are actually very close to falling apart due to overuse. But I still feel veeery seen. Thank you for a truly excellent quiz Heather!
I picked “Carol” but the actual best (Christmas) holiday movie is “Tokyo Godfathers.”
Jennifer Beale’s Flashdance Legwarmers/Slippers – *YES* this is 100% accurate, good quiz.
Dwayne Wayne’s Jordans Collection sounds ideal to me.
Laura Dern‘s Jurassic Park boots…yeah pretty much my daily footwear.
It was a true honor to get Mia Thermopolis’ Doc Martens.
British me: I don’t recognise any of these ice crea- VIENETTA!!!
Also I was literally just talking about the DMs I had as a teen so this is v accurate.
I had the same thing with the ice cream! The dinosaur one did look very intriguing.
Without having taken the test yet, I just know I’m a Doc Martens.
Turns out I’m actually Anne Lister’s boots and I couldn’t be more honored.
I got Barbarella’s Boots (“A good many dramatic situations begin with screaming.”)
Which, given that I’ve literally done a Barbarella-inspired burlesque routine (set to “Space Girl” by the Imagined Village), is completely accurate.
Whoa, the phrase “iced potatoes” gave me a sudden sensory memory of some kind of dessert recipe that my mom used to make when I was a kid involving potatoes and icing sugar. That’s all I can remember of it. What even are iced potatoes anyway?
I got Barbarella’s Boots, which seem like big shoes to fill
LOL yes, potatoes and icing sugar, lots and lots (and lots) of icing sugar.
Why in all of the gods names would you do that to those poor potatoes?
Apparently potato candy is a thing!
I took it twice and got Mr. Rogers’s sneakers and Anne Lister’s boots, which is the best (most aspirational) compliment I’ve ever gotten.
I got Mr. Rogers because the best princess/prince is Peach. She’s great in Smash Brothers & powerful.
these options actually killed me and i spent way too long googling where the hell i can buy dinosaur egg ice cream and how to make a vibranium milkshake??
(and laura dern’s jurassic park boots do accurately describe half of my shoe collection btw)
Laura Dern’s Jurassic park boots! I mean I’ve been debating getting brown/tan boots I instead of my standard black next time I have to replace my boots. So this feels spot on.
“Dinosaurs eat man. Woman inherits the earth. :)” XD XD XD
I got Laura Dern’s Jurassic Park boots… and that is strangely accurate. I saw Jurassic Park when I was around 12 and it was A experience…I have always felt this pull to Laura Dern on a screen, and I had similar boots when I was 14-15, boots I treasured for a long time. Boots that should have been a clue in retrospective.
Anyway, I’m proud!
When I first saw this quiz I thought “well this is silly and oddly specific.” However, I’m apparently JLo’s gold wedge sneaker in Hustlers and I’m really blown away by the accuracy, HEATHER HOW DID YOU KNOW I’M HARD FEMME