Hey squirrel friends! This week’s Tuesday Televisionary is chock full of awesome, so let’s get right into it, shall we? But first, news!
Hey, didja hear: McSteamy has a sex tape! Grey’s Anatomy‘s Dr. McSteamy (Eric Dane) and his wife Rebecca Gayheart are in a sex tape with some former beauty queen. LOLOMGWTFBBQ.
And speaking of Grey’s, watch an awesome interview with Jessica Capshaw (one half of CALIZONA!) at E! Online. Also go watch this new Glee clip (thanks, Nicole!), a behind-the-scenes look at the making of their cover of Kanye’s “Gold Digger.” Just a few more weeks and we can watch Glee every week! And then you might as well watch this new Gossip Girl promo too. Also you can [sneakily] watch the 13th unaired Dollhouse episode, “Epitaph One,” here, in HD! Ok I’m done.
The Autostraddle TV Awards For the Week Ending August 16, 2009
Nurse Jackie Episode 110: Ring Finger, by Carlytron
True Blood Episode 209: I Will Rise Up, by Laneia
America’s Best Dance Crew Episode 402: Beyonce Challenge, by Intern Vashti
Weeds Episode 510: Perro Insano, by Carlytron
Hot Girl of the Week Award, by Intern Lola
Better off Ted Episode 112: Jabberwocky & 113: Secrets and Lives, by Carlytron
My Life on the D-List finale, by Intern Jess
Mad Men Episode 301: Night on the Town, by Crystal
Drop Dead Diva Episode 106: Second Chances, by Intern Lily
Toddlers & Tiaras, by Laneia
Intervention: Sebastian and Marcel, by Tinkerbell
The Glorious Downward Spiral Award: Nurse Jackie
(Episode 110: Ring Finger)
I’m gonna just get this out of the way right now: oh. em. gee.
Great, moving on. This episode was INSANE. Nurse Jackie and O’Hara kiss and make up in a totally awesome BFF realistic way that I totally get. Then a guy drops dead in a post office from cardiac arrest, and the team is unable to revive him. Jackie does some really sweet things for the recently deceased patient that almost make you forget about how Nurse Jackie spends the rest of the episode, which involves getting mega high, having O’Hara saw off her wedding ring with like a bonesaw or something (it was stuck), giving Coop the biggest mindfuck of all time (she doesn’t freak when he grabs her boob and then KISSES HIM on the MOUTH), and finally smashing her finger with a hammer to help explain why the ring is broken. Wow. Just… wow. I have never experienced anything like this show, for real-reals. Also Zoe walks in on a post-coital Eddie and Jackie which is hiiii-larious.
And I know I’ve said this before, but to really appreciate the complexities of a show like this (and True Blood as well) you should be reading Jacob’s incredible recaps over at Television Without Pity. Here’s a particularly hilarious excerpt from the scene where Jackie talks to Coop in Eddie’s pharmacy, right at the beginning of the scene:
“There is always going to be tension between us,” Jackie says, and the truly alien geometry of what she’s about to do becomes clear. Oh, girl! I love you! That is some Xena Warrior Princess shit right there. Not to mention proof positive from the creative team that lesbians know exactly what they’re doing when they scare the shit out of you, which I’ve always wondered about.
The Number One Feeling Award: True Blood
(Episode 209: I Will Rise Up)
“She was clumsy, stupid and mean, but i wouldn’t wish that kind of death on a possum.” -Arlene
Highlights of Episode 9, I Will Rise Up, include but are not limited to:
1. Sookie sucking Eric’s blood, inadvertently linking them together forevs and evs. This was really hilarious at first, when I hadn’t connected the dots regarding Eric’s intentions.
TANGENT: In the book, Sookie has this great dry sense of humor, with a good mix of self-deprecation and smugness. Either the writers/directors don’t give Paquin the chance to show this side of Sookie, or they do but she’s terrible at it. This scene kind of redeems her. Or, you know, maybe I’m reading too much into it.
2. Eric begging Godric to stay. I’m gonna show my cards here and tell you that I absolutely loved the relationship between Eric and Godric. Not because it had some sort of gay undertone — I don’t think it did, really — but because it was so pure and real. This scene broke my wee little heart, you guys. [“Come on, it was a little queer, right?” – Carlytron]
“Are you very scared? -Sookie
3. Jessica meeting Hoyt’s Mama! This awesome scene was set up by an equally awesome scene involving Hoyt telling Mama what a hateful, prejudiced bitch she is. He didn’t call her a bitch — I did. Later on, at Merlotte’s, Jessica tries harder than anyone should to impress and befriend Mama, which of course doesn’t work. Hoyt stands by his woman and sort of grows up right before our very eyes. Oh, hey, have I mentioned how much I love Hoyt and Jessica? [“They are still very much my number one feeling this week.” – Carlytron]
4. Jason and Sookie dealing with life, together and such. Here’s another touching moment that really touched me. I was touched. That’s what she said.
5. Anna Paquin was topless! Sookie dreamed a little dream about Eric. This took at least 20 minutes, I think. I like Eric better when he’s an a-hole.
6. WHERE’S MY CORN??! Self-explanatory.
7. Lafayette and Lettie Mae save Tara from black contact lenses/Maryann. Lafayette is so amazing! I may have said “wooo!” I definitely said, “You know what’s sad? This happens all the time. Your mama and your cousin have to come and drag you out of someone’s house, drunk, kicking and screaming. And your boyfriend gets beaten up. Happens all the fucking time, ya know?” And then Cheryl said, “Mmm hmmm. Write that down.”
“I don’t know what you is, but I’m feelin’ you, and you a soulless bitch.” -Lafayette, obvs
So what did I miss? There are only 3 episodes left!
Next: Vogue Evolution does Beyonce, Weeds, and the Hot Girl of the Week Award!