Sometimes you wake up and open Slack, thinking it’s gonna be a pretty normal day of normal business, but find instead that Valerie Anne has posted a TikTok of Aubrey Plaza in a full and entire witch costume, signing books, and saying there’s gonna be a Happiest Season 2 ’cause “Riley needs love” also.
NO IM SO EXCITED I CANT (from @ electrop0p on ig)
To be quite honest, nothing makes more sense to me than this prophecy of Happiest Season 2. First of all, Aubrey Plaza was hands down the fan favorite of the original, to the point that most lesbians watching this HOLIDAY ROM-COM wanted to see Mackenzie Davis’ Harper get mowed down by a snow plow so Riley and Kristen Stewart’s Abby could live happily ever after. And second of all, thanks to the huge success of Happiest Season on Hulu, there’s about ten new queer Christmas movies this year. Feels like an insta-Holiday Classic to me! Or should I say… AutoClassic.
Now, according to holiday movie lore, what needs to happen here is that Riley needs to meet someone who is full of optimism and Christmas spirit, to the point that it makes her absolutely bonkers, being a misanthrope and all, but for some reason — maybe the reason of: body heat to stay alive??? — this happy hopeful queer wins Riley over. Riley’s like “Ugh fine, I’ll go to the stupid tree farm!” And “Ugh gross but sure I’ll drink this hot cocoa under the stars with you while the sound of children caroling fills the air.” Next thing you know, there’s SMOOCHING. And happily ever afters.
Clea, call me! And ho ho ho, homos!