Hey there, hi there, ho there queermos! Welcome to this week’s Friday Open Thread, in which we discuss contemporary art and its masters. JK! It’s our weekly space for dog photos, first-date jitters, coming out stories, and more. In fact, we have a Friday Open Thread every week just because we love you and wanna know your life. Also because I love dog photos. Here’s my dog on a blanket at the beach last weekend. Also, me, in a sunhat.
I haven’t been lucky enough to host y’all in this big, bad Internet party since Independence Day weekend, so I’m glad to be back in the saddle again holding the reins to your heart. Since then, I both took off to Ocean City for a Straddler-Owned and Operated trip to #Puppateague National Park and returned to my life at home post-Canada. What this means is, I’ve basically been thinking about how much I like Canada for like two entire weeks and drinking hard cider with some tiny grains of sand in it mostly as a coping mechanism. I’m okay with that.
I’ve also returned to my daily grind, meaning I’ve once again discovered how much I love my morning paper on the Metro. Lately, my new goal is to get all the way to the end before the journey ends, both because of the trashy celebrity gossip and because of the horoscopes. As my life at work has shifted and changed, these daily guides from the stars have been shedding some serious insight on my life.
I’ve been really into astrology since I was a kid, when I asked my mom if I could bring my astrology kit to church. (I couldn’t. That’s blasphemy or something.) It wasn’t hard for me to get into it once I learned I was a Leo: Everytime I picked up a book or read a column about my sign, it basically told me I’d be awesome at sex, dominate the social scene, and learn to love myself fiercely in my adult age. Um, yes. All of that, please. It didn’t help that the personality analysis always sounded so spot-on, or that I came with age to realize the self-fulfilling prophecies of going through exactly what my very first horoscope book told me I’d go through as a young adult. Plus, I’ve always been into fortune cookies and trying to see God and stuff, so why not be into living my life by the planets and stars? I’ve seen enough shit go wrong when Mercury is in retrograde to know that you don’t fuck with the pseudo-science of the truth.
So, the end of this long-winded story of how much I love myself is mostly that I really wanna know what sign you are! I’m not one of those people who will refuse friendship with a Saggitarius or preach social strategies to a Cancer — I’m just curious. Plus, I’m hoping to find at least 50-100 other weirdos who rely on an arbitrary constellation assignment to guide their daily lives. (Don’t know your sign yet or why it matters in your life at all but totally on board to get weird with me? Check out Kade’s flawless guide to the stars right here on Autostraddle.)
Not into astrology? Judging me for my lack of rational thought right meow? That’s okay, too — I’d also like to know about what you made for dinner this week, how your pets are doing (PICS OR IT NEVER HAPPENED), who you’re in love with, whether or not you’re playing the Kim Kardashian app, and how you’re doing at summer school. And if you’re tempted or dying to share something I haven’t touched on yet, go for it! I’m so deeply interested in everything you’ve got going on, you know? I’m just that in love with you.
I’ll respond to pet photos with my own pet photos, and I’ll respond to everyone else with good ol’ warmth and kindness. Plus, you could win a huge block of cheese by commenting on someone else’s post in the comment thread tonight instead of just commenting to me! Not really, but isn’t good conversation it’s own reward? Well, whatever. Now it is.
Okay, huckabees! Get stargazing. This Leo is ready to roar with you.
How To Post a Photo In The Comments:
1. Find a photo! This is the easy part. Find a photo on the web, right click (on a Mac, control+click), hit “Copy Image URL,” and then…
2. Code it in to your comment! Use the following code, and use a DIRECT LINK to the image. Your image link should end in .JPG or .GIF or .PNG or .CallMeWhateverYouWant even. I don’t care, but it should be an image suffix!
How To Post a Video In The Comments, Too:
1. Find a video on YouTube or Vimeo or WHATEVER and click “embed.” Copy that code, but first make sure it’s for 640px wide or less. If your player is too large, it will not display properly.
2. Copy the code and paste it directly into your comment.
3. Go forth and jam.