It took me years to settle into the idea that masculinity and topping were actually, authentically my identities.
How a a 28-year-old white genderfluid bisexual in recovery from an eating disorder/anxiety/depression does polyamory.
Somehow, self-identifying as a submissive makes some potential doms think I am their sub.
“Smashing the patriarchy and organizing for a rape crisis center on our college campus while also taking a gender studies class. Also I was a data point in her thesis. It was about gender neutral housing.”
You don’t have to hide under your pillows or hide from your partners this month, but expect a few potholes in the otherwise smooth pavement of your relational rapport.
You just have to be honest about what you’re looking for, and keep going after it.
“Desperately pining for the cute queer Hot Topic employee who complimented my yellow doc martens the other day”
Here’s how a 28-year-old Arab-American queer demisexual cis woman living in the urban Midwest does ethical non-monogamy.
“I guess I had a lot of opinions that night because you told me that I was especially chatty. I told you it was because you weren’t giving me anything to keep my mouth busy.”
“We met on the first day of high school. I was drawn to her for some reason. She was reading; that might have been it. She had glasses; that could have been it, too.”
Sometimes, being in kinky subspace opens old wounds from an abusive relationship — but sometimes, it can give you the power to close them.
I want to break things — holes, walls, people. I want to feel the begging in my pelvis and let it ignite the fire under me to burn bright up my spine and light up all my colors.
People often describe fate by saying “the stars aligned,” and that’s true. Our planets collaborated through the alchemy of our bodies that night. Our bodies aligned, the stars aligned.
Chocolate might give a temporary sugar rush, but this DIY weed lube will keep your vagina high all night long.
The leather Ramona strap-on harness feels extremely sexy in a way that nylon and spandex harnesses never do.
“Boats have also been incredibly healing for me and have really helped me create better relationships in all parts of my life. They make me work harder to maintain my friendships, be better at communication, and generally just better at existing around all different kinds of people.”
I imagine being a collared submissive as a physical manifestation of my and my dominant’s commitment, a symbol around kinky folks and a public secret around vanilla ones.
What do you get your hot new girlfriend, your best friend, your ex, the barista you’re secretly in love with, the couple you want to sleep with, and more for Valentine’s day? These sex toys.
“Eclipses are times when our ordinary lives are interrupted, when we’re asked to reckon with hidden desires and motivations, secrets long buried, and unexpected breakthroughs and revelations.”
“He’d asked me about it before, saying it was something he’d always wanted. And now, he was quivering on the floor, looking up at me, handing me an open knife with both hands.”