B&B Stands for Bigoted & Bitchy When the Owner Hates Gay People

Summer holidays are upon us. The sun is shining and the grass looks greener anywhere besides your front yard. Last year LGBT vacationers dumped $65 billion into the American economy so we could relax, put our feet up and escape the stress of everyday life. However, we’ve been getting a bit more on our pillows than a foil-wrapped chocolate mint. You know what else is stale and leaves your mouth dry? Unsolicited bigotry!

Nowadays you don’t even need to check in to partake in the complimentary homophobia. Sometimes you merely walk by a B&B and they’ll spew their hate in a poorly kerned sign.

CH/CK FILA APPRECIATION DAY AUG \ WEDNESDAY 871-9555 MARRIAGE ONE MAN ONE WOMAN ONE GOD via Joe My God

This was the lovely sign Joianne Fraschilla saw when she walked by the Whitebriar Bed and Breakfast in Beverly, NJ. Given that this is not, “like visiting Grand Mom,” Fraschilla went to their Facebook page to let the B&B know that her family was disappointed by their support of Chick-Fil-A. Instead of receiving an explanation, an apology or even semi-intelligent reply, she got this from owner Carole Lokan-Moore.

Isn’t it wonderful Joanne Fraschilla, that you and your son can enjoy the animals here because I have a traditional marriage with a husband who works with me 90 hours a week to take care of these animals, and the summer camp….we’re 66-68 years old….there were no gays or queers in our time…..if two old ladies chose to live together..so be it, let them deal with God when they get there…but to have the “face sucking” thrown in my face of two gay lesbians who are totally destroying the “normal balance in a child’s life” as you claim your son…where is the role model that your son needs to know how to act like a man? or will he only see the “one sided selfishness” of a “single parent”…and end up an out cast in society by being “gay” himself because he didn’t have a father as a role model. I’ll pray for you….remember what the bible says: “Lay down with dogs, get up with fleas”…..guess that’s why God invented aids…. THIS LOCAL BUSINESS WILL BE ONE MAN ONE WOMAN ONE GOD MAKES MARRIAGE….AND PROUD TO DO SO….YOU SHOULD BE SO LUCKY TO OWN YOUR OWN BUSINESS

Several media outlets have already covered how ridiculous her statements are. Franschilla is organizing a petition to ask the B&B to apologize, but it may be for nought. Lokan-Moore is a proud small business owner, proud Christian and proud bigot. In her own words, “a whole lot of criticism isn’t going to change my mind.”

Unfortunately the arrogant bigot-trinity (privately run establishments, religion and discrimination) comes up quite often. It seems like hatemongers think they aren’t accountable for their discriminatory practices as long as they are The Boss with a thick book in the bedside table drawer. Faith-based discrimination comes up in B&Bs more often since guests are staying in the proprietor’s private house, where the owners do have the right to their own religious freedom. However, converting a private residence into lodging causes it to become a public accomodation which is subject to laws protecting individuals from discrimination. Sexual orientation-based discrimination is tricky in the U.S. since protection is still on a state-by-state basis, but we’ll wait for the day these rights are granted to all Americans.

Luckily, more individuals are winning the fight against bigots and their businesses. In 2009, a gay couple was barred from a bed and breakfast in Grand Forks, BC. Brian Thomas and Shaun Eadie had booked a stay at Susan and Les Molnar’s Riverbend Bed and Breakfast, but had the reservation cancelled once the Molnars realized the men were gay. The men were rightly angered and took the Molnars to court. At the recent hearing the Molnars’ lawyer defended their actions because “the Molnars could not allow activities in their home that would offend what they believe is their God and their church.” The BC Human Rights Tribunal separated church from state because although the B&B operated out of the Molnar’s home it was still “a commercial activity, subject to laws preventing discrimination based on sexual orientation.” The couple was awarded $3000 for the ordeal. It’s a financially small win, but it’s a reminder that we have the right to travel just like everyone else.

Times are a-changing and sometimes two ladies need a queen sized mattress, not two twin beds bolted three meters apart. If you are lucky enough to travel, take the opportunity let your money speak and support small businesses that support you. The more we’re out there, the more the hospitality industry will realize that they need to cater to us as well. If you do end up vacationing in an unfriendly place and don’t have a pick of accommodations, fly under the radar (if you can) strictly for self-preservation or stick with a chain that has a great track record. Luckily, there are more and more options aimed at queers so you don’t need to constantly rely on Choice Hotels (unless you want to).

Sometimes a B&B will seem utterly perfect, but you don’t know whether they’ll turn on you if you reveal that you’re gay. If you have other housing backups, be openly queer when you book. Let the person know that you’re planning a trip with your girlfriend/wife/partner, not your sister/best friend/tennis coach. If they react badly or it just feels off, politely let them know that there’s a reason you’re paying to stay elsewhere. No amount of “antique furnishings, collectibles and oriental rugs [will] make you feel at home” when the proprietor is a homophobic asshole.

Don’t feel too dismayed if you can’t stay at that one beautiful inn. When it comes down to it, you wouldn’t want to stay in a hateful place, and you definitely wouldn’t want to give them money. You’d rather get the discrimination out of the way by phone before your safety, shelter and deposit are at risk when you check in. Just be sure to warn other travelers of establishments with bigoted policies. If something truly heinous occurred let your case be known on a larger scale. Perhaps bigoted business owners will see the error of their ways when they see the void in their cash registers that could have been filled with a share of 65 billion rainbow dollars.

Hailing from Vancouver, Kristen's still trying to figure out how to survive Montreal's Real Legitimate Canadian Winter. So far she's discovered that warm socks, giant toques and Tabby kittens all play a role in her survival. Her ultimate goal is to rank higher than KStew in the "Kristen + Autostraddle" Google Search competition.

Kristen has written 140 articles for us.

25 Comments

  1. i think a few gay couples should book a reservation and if they are discriminated against by this self righteous bible thumper, sue the living daylights out her. the petition probably WON’T change her mind. some people refuse to get it until they face ecomonic consequences.

  2. We have to remember that gay people being allowed to use B&Bs without harrassment would lead to gay cootie epidemics, earthquakes, tsunamis, people wearing Birkenstocks with socks, cats and dogs living together outside of holy matrimony, etc. Really, attitudes like Lokan-Moore’s are the only thing holding back a raging torrent of ungodliness and, worse, disrespectability.

  3. I kind of love when this sort of story comes up, and it’s got fairly direct parallels to how black people in the past had to have guides posted for black friendly establishments, and entire travel guides and books and lists of where it was safe for them to go to (It was called the ‘Green Guide’, NYT had an article about it not too long ago which is where I heard of it)…

    Gay rights are not a civil rights issue my happy gay arce. >.<

    And the simple logic of 'It's a business, and thusly has laws regarding its operation' seems so beyond the homophobic…no, you don't run a private men's club or golf course, you run a public business, you have laws you have to follow, jerk. Sigh.

  4. This kind of thing just drives me crazy. My parents own a BnB here in CO, and another BnB in town pulled a similar stunt. A couple showed up to their inn to check in, and upon finding out the couple was gay, they promptly told them they were not welcome and to leave. So they came to our place instead. They were shocked at the bigotry and frankly so were we.

    Luckily, some innkeeping organizations are speaking out, such as this one: http://www.innkeeping.org/news/99186/Innkeeping-Association-Condemns-Innkeepers-Facebook-Rant.htm

  5. i feel like things have reverted back a few years since all of this Chick-fil-a hoopla! i know they have always been there but i think a lot of people may have lost confidence that took them a long time to find in themselves. i worry about all off the LGBT teens and younger who are out there looking at the pics from Aug. 1 online. i worry for them to actually see all the people out there that don’t support them . i fought about Chick-fil-a for days with family and “friends” online and off….i realized how much it was bringing me down and giving power to stuff that CFA stands for. i think we need to ignore it…i want to stop giving it power….i’m really afraid that it’s gotten so much momentum it’s just going to get bigger and bigger. forgive my bad writing skills and grammar, LOL! but i hope anyone who agrees with me will pass along the message, let’s start putting focus toward the positive again!!

  6. please understand, i wasn’t referring to this wonderful and informative article when i say we need to ignore and stop giving power…!! much love to Autostraddle!! 🙂 the B&B bigots just got me thinking about the WHOLE problem and things going on in the LGBT world in the past weeks.

    • No offense taken! I think it’s important to hear what y’all are thinking.

      When it comes to LGBT news my google reader is bittersweet. Half of my feeds are telling me we’re making progress outside of the Americas (Vietnam and Tasmania!), people are celebrating at their pride parades and LGBT individuals are starting up cool conferences that let people celebrate all aspects of their lives.

      But unfortunately we’re no where close to equality right now. So I’m getting a lot of stories about people getting discriminated against and treated like less than second class citizens. I want to let readers know that HOLY SHIT the world sucks sometimes… but we aren’t powerless. We have the strength of numbers and money to show the assholes that we have a right to be here.

      So if I am writing about CFA or something equally upsetting… I’ll also tell readers how they can take the power back.

      • that’s why i love autostraddle!! full of smarty pants who know what to say and when to say it!! i guess i should have specified, i’m mostly talking about random posts on places like facebook that start holy wars! every few days you’d see some type of equality post on my FB with not much of a response…..but as soon as i started posting about the Chick!! Woooooo! it really knocked me for a loop. i felt safe in my own little bubble, in my small town…not realizing the hate the was hiding in my own family and acquaintances. so thanks for all the great info! and thank you for believing that we’re not powerless yet….i haven’t been too sure in the past week. 🙂

  7. I don’t think the owner should have to apologize for supporting Chick-Fil-hAte, or for the sign in front of her property, or for her rude response on facebook. Ultimately the sign just helps those who care know not to give her their business, and the fact that she was outright rude in a public forum only serves to make her look worse.

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