Remember when we thought Angel Haze and Ireland Baldwin seemed especially cute and cuddly lately? As per usual, Autostraddle’s professional levels of gaydar are at Olympic levels of accuracy, because your favorite pansexual rapper confirmed to The Independent that yes, the two are together, the feelings are strong, and it is on like Donkey Kong.
“There are still certain limitations for women. If we were two guys, it’d be insane, negatively insane with the attention. With us, it’s all being very positive. The media are like, ‘Oh they’re so cute, they’re best friends’. An interracial gay couple, I mean that’s just weird for America right now. We f**k and friends don’t f**k.”
For all you naysayers who would like to point out that a sexual relationship isn’t indicative of an emotional relationship, Haze also spoke to the Telegraph at Glastonbury Festival, where she and Ireland were very openly smoochy.
“It’s when we felt comfortable enough to share it with people,” she (Haze) explains. “You have to have a foundation in your relationship, where you can say, ‘yeah I want to be with you.’ Then you can put it out there for the world to criticize and judge. I feel like if we can control what people see, it doesn’t really matter. I’m so overly affectionate with her publicly; it’s like why hide it? I love you, you love me. People can say what they want. It doesn’t matter anymore.”
Think about every time your main smooch was referred to by a waiter or your mother or a well-meaning liquor store employee as “your friend”. Think about how many times it took before your family stopped introducing your partner as “her roommate.” It’s a testament to female sexuality (and its reputation as invalid so long as a man is not involved in some way) that Angel Haze and Ireland Baldwin’s fairly obvious relationship was referred to in gossip rags and fashion blogs as “best friends” up until yesterday. There is a photo of the two holding hands after exiting a club where they were very publicly affectionate, and multiple celebrity news outlets titled the photo “BFFs Angel Haze and Ireland Baldwin”.
I’m not saying that on occasions both regretful and not completely terrible we don’t sometimes do sexual things with our best friends, but these two are so clearly not in that category. It makes me think about the fact that a pair of women could be participating in a graphic sexual act in public and people might still walk by and say “Oh, they must be friends!”
So, just in case your Pride wasn’t exciting and messy enough, make sure you raise a glass and do a tequila shot or two in honor of these crazy smitten kittens. And take a moment to absorb the fact that this tweet is a real thing that happened:
ugh i’ve never been so happy to watch two people i don’t know make out all over the goddamn internet. bless them.
i mean, i bet they make each other epic friendship bracelets, all i’m saying.
Ugh, so friendly
omg. just great.
can i have a friendship like that? :p
(but seriously, THANK YOU to Angel for calling that shiz out. Vair annoying.)
They are seriously cute. Also check out Phoebe Dahl and Ruby Rose. It’s a great time for lesbian couples. Makes me happy!
this is beautiful
Is the fact that the media kept calling them BFFs really because they don’t acknowledge female sexuality or because they’re still so reluctant to out people that they refuse to report on the obvious? They did the same thing with Zachary Quinto and Jonathan Groff when they were constantly getting photographed together and it was obvious they were dating but ZQ had never made a public statement.
I think the broader discussion is whether the media needs to quit doing a song and dance routine to go out of their way to avoid reporting the obvious unless someone makes an official statement.
the thing is that we can walk into any grocery store check out aisle and see at least five different magazine covers speculating whether or not heterosexual celebrity #1 and #2 are together because they were SPOTTED EATING SALAD WITHIN THE SAME BLOCK! or ROBERT AND KRISTEN WALKING IN THE SAME DIRECTION, THEY MUST BE HAVING SEX AGAIN!! or KHLOE SEEN IN SAME VIP LOUNGE WITH RAPPER, THEY ARE DEFINITELY PUTTING THEIR INTIMATE PARTS TOGETHER!!!
two women holding hands? BESTIES! ellen page going out in public with another girl prior to coming out in media? ELLEN PAGE HAS SO MANY FEMALE FRIENDS, WE LOVE HER FRIENDSHIPS! GIRLCRUSH OF THE WEEK! TOMBOY INSPO! but ellen page in same general vicinity as, say, one of her inception co-stars? ELLEN PAGE MOST CERTAINLY HAVING INTERCOURSE WITH JOSPEH GORDON LEVITT, MUST READ!!!!
That’s not about female sexuality though, it’s about the media being unwilling to speculate about relationships involving people who aren’t officially out. They do this “so and so with her bestie” routine because they don’t want to be accused of outing people.
Heck, magazines were running photographs of Matt Bomer with his husband, who he was legally married to, and still not acknowledging that they were together because he hadn’t ever made a statement. And Anderson Cooper was constantly getting papped with his boyfriend that everyone knew was his boyfriend but the gossip press refused to say it because no announcement.
For that matter, yesterday everyone got all flustered because OH NOES! a CNBC anchor referred to Apple’s Tim Cook as a gay CEO of a major corporation. Doesn’t matter that everyone on the planet knows that Tim Cook is gay, someone on CNBC saying it prompted handwringing about whether CNBC outed him.
Until the media stops acting like people aren’t out unless they make a statement to the media or tweet something specific, you’re going to keep seeing the double standard.
That might be part of it, but we know that same-gender relationships – especially female ones – are not taken as seriously as heterosexual ones. I mean, right? So I’d be shocked if that was not influencing reporting in some big way. When we see female sexuality discounted in our culture, I don’t think it makes sense to declare that it’s totally unrelated when media outlets consistently declare this a “friendship.” It is (and has been for a while) the most blatantly non-friendship-romantic-and-sexy-times relationship ever. Maybe worries about “outing” played some role, but personally I agree that this was mostly about discounting female sexuality.
Media outlets are definitely more shy about outing people nowadays, but in this case, with this amount of public face-sucking going on, I think labeling it “friendship” is more about erasing female sexuality than avoiding censure.
I would love to see two famous men kissing publicly being referred to as “BFFs” by the press.
All I know is the current issue of Seventeen magazine has Ireland Baldwin still dating her ex-boyfriend in one of their articles this month so I’m not buying the “They just don’t want to out them” in Ireland and Angel’s case. Neither one are exactly in the closet about their relationship. As has been said. They make out all over social media. They also make out and hold hands in public and are still getting the “best friends” label. They do the same thing with Michelle and Cara.
could someone please explain the orange is the new black reference
Your “Poussey” (pussy) is so “Taystee”.
And in the one Kryst created-
Your “Poussey” is “Soso” “Taystee”
Team Two Women Literally Having Sex: 1; Team Gal Pals: 0
I haven’t like Angel Haze’s color struck azz since she dissed Azealia Banks for her skin color when she is clearly dark-skinned herself. I’m not shocked her self-hating behind is going out with a blond haired, blue eyed white woman. :Eyeroll: Oh well.
YES! I almost forgot that happened. I knew there wasn’t a reason I didn’t love Angel Haze. Thank you for the necessary reminder. It definitely puts her relationship with Ireland Baldwin into a certain perspective, no?
Yes it does, lol. I date interracially and I have nothing against it, but I *DO* give black people (and Asians and non-white Latinos)the side eye if they NEVER EVER EVER stop to think critically about whether or not they date white people because they are suffering from internalized racism and self hatred or if they are genuinely attracted to the people they are dating. This goes DOUBLE if they EXCLUSIVELY date interracially and would NEVER EVER EVER date someone non-white. Many of black people are *FULLY* aware that some black people out here are suffering from Stockholm syndrome and that THOSE black people are the ones that the average white person seems to “like” the most. Stockholm syndrome, as you know, is when hostages sympathize, love, and identify with their kidnappers and abusers. Well imagine being hostages in a country for 400 years in racially-based caste society where European colonists assign you the lowest racial caste status that you can NEVER transcend and systematically use it to expose you to all manner of physical, psychological, and emotional abuse while simultaneously assigning themselves a permanently superior caste status. Then imagine THE WORLD adopting that racial hierarchy. Then imagine that fuckery continuing on a global scale TODAY.
The psychological warfare of racism…well, not every black person is strong enough to fight internalizing the continuous and consistent CONSCIOUS and SUBCONSCIOUS negative messages. I empathize with kids going through internalized oppression and as an intelligent and rational black person who knows my history I try with ALL my MIGHT to try to sympathize with adults like this too. And it generally works…until I’m ACTUALLY confronted with a self-hating black person, lol. It disgusts me when self hating black people are clearly using “colorblindness” to make up for being a literate grown ass adult with internet connection and Google access that chooses to: A)remain willfully ignorant and B)make comments that support centuries old, debunked, and racist anti-black stereotypes. Even when worse is when a casually racist asshole actually DOES have a Black Friend ™ (which is rare)and this brainwashed person takes it upon themselves to enter a conversation JUST to DEFEND or MINIMIZE racism. Nope..I just can’t with Angel Haze and this blonde girl. Side-eye all damn day long.
Wow I didn’t know she did that. That’s not cool. I identify as African American myself and of mixed race (Creole) so my skin is fair. As much as I don’t like my fair skin, I am proud of who I am but I would NEVER diss my fully black beautiful sistahs and brothas. That’s just wrong. I know her and Azalea Banks were beefing so maybe that had something to do with the comment. I know when musicians beef they always find something to diss on the other about, whether it’s relevant or not. But I am not sure what Azalea Banks said to her. But their beef is squashed and Angel even apologized and said “I didn’t like what happened”. But I can definitely understand the issue presented because that’s not cool to diss anyone about their skin. That’s a huge problem in our community. We have racism amongst ourselves with “light skin” and “dark skin”, and it’s sad and needs to end. But I tend to only date women of color to be honest. Do you think it is wrong of me not to date white girls? I am seriously asking :)
Oh dear Shesus do I love Angel’s comments of “We fuck” and that usually you don’t fuck your friends. On one hand we got a celeb lady clearly announcing “yeah we have sex, no duh” about another woman and she’s aware of complexities/layers of shit as to why their relationship gets written of as platonic and some of the tiny tiny sorta privilege gay “straight looking” women have over gay men.
On the other hand some us queer ladies are giggling at “you don’t have sex with your friends” because “lesbian circle of doom”.
Before I get jumped on I want to explain the tiny tiny sorta privilege gay “straight looking” women thing. With my older brother and his wife I never got the benefit of doubt as to my sexuality and my identity.
To them I was obviously a butch lesbian yet to step out the closet, the most mock worthy type of gay, because I fit their antiquated stereotype.
Handy with tools, wears items from the men’s department (cause using said tools gets messy), uncomfortable exposing my body, worked out doing push-ups, lifting weights rather do ladylike work outs, wore work boots (they were combat boots) and so any girl my age I they saw me with I was obviously munching her carpet.
Now that they have 3 kids they spend less time thinking about who I fuck, how I do it and when I’m going to give up my pathetic attempts at femininity. Still it’s damn twisted how they wanted me out of a closet and into a role they’d still mock me for. Thank fuck they live far away, but I still worry about my nieces getting gender policed and the shit my brother will teach my nephew about how to treat women.
I’m so sorry that happened to you – that is pretty twisted. I just want to highlight though that “looking straight” (by which we often mean presenting as femme) is a double-edged sword. It’s true, on one hand they are given a pass in some ways because they aren’t overtly gender-non-conforming. It is certainly helpful to be able to go stealth when needed, too. However, there have been lots of great things written on Autostraddle about femme invisibility, which is a crappy thing that invalidates femme queer women and can make them feel alienated from queer community, among other unpleasant things. Others here have probably said this better than I can articulate it right now.
So, I agree with you, but there’s just a quick additional thought about that tiny privilege!
I have read some of those pieces on femme invisbilty here on autostraddle and elsewhere, wanted to incorporate some of that into my comment but I’m poor writer. :P
Sometimes I feel like the some of the invalidation shit femmes get thrown at them from fellow queer women is backlash from failing at or pushing away “traditional womanhood” aesthetically and otherwise. Crudely I could say it’s like when little girls decide they’re big girls and destroy their barbies. Something feels so fucked up about that statement but it kinda fits. Um I never destroyed my barbies just put electrical tape on them…..hmmm.
I can relate to this. I’m a very high femme whom no one believes is gay…even some of my friends don’t believe me and still think “I’ll go back to men” even though I’m literally a fucking gold star. :Eyeroll: While I DO have to deal with constant erasure by myself, I’ve ONLY ever experienced hostile homophobic aggression when I was with a more masculine lesbian. I feel privileged in the sense that thanks to my highly feminine gender presentation, I fit our culture’s gender norms and I don’t have to contend with the forms of discrimination folks with more liminal gender expressions do. I completely and totally admire bois, studs, and butches for being themselves in a world that’s immediately hostile to anyone who has a transgressive gender presentation.
This is (one of the many reasons) why I love Autostraddle: vapid fluff (with photos!) presented with a serious, thoughtful, and much-needed discussion of queer relationships and visibility in the media. Thank you!
Yay, bout damn time. Good for them!
Throwing this out there: isn’t there a flip side to this? Like when Lorde was asked about her friendship with Taylor Swift, and she was offended that people were taking her being affectionate as sexual.
Now, on one hand, it’s totally easy to distinguish between the BFF pda of Swift/Lorde and the ‘oh come ON’ pda of Baldwin/Haze. On the other hand, it’s not always that obvious, right? Where do you draw the line on speculating about same sex friendships/relationships?
Putting my head into the space of the asshole gaze Lorde is odd and wore something that looked like menswear while performing at an music awards show. Oh and her boyfriend is Asian which according to one of my brothers that is the same thing as a woman.
So I guess my conclusion is the media draws its line is where they think 2 women are too normal or appealing to possibly be romantically involved. I don’t speculate unless I’m seeing Level III PDA and some cutesy talk happening.
Ok so I just have to say I’m done with people being offended when folks speculate. Because we (community we) spend half our lives with people assuming we are straight because that is preferable and palatable to society. I’ve now lost respect for Lorde due to this (amongst other things). Just like I lost respect for Kate Winslet in the 90s when she was quoted as saying kissing a girl for her job was gross.
People shouldn’t have to “Admit” they’re gay, it’s not a crime. And people shouldn’t be offended if people think they’re gay…its not offensive. If the media and society could wrap their heads round this it would be great…and pigs may fly.
i was curious as to which Lorde interview you are referring to? Earlier this year some radio host was being and idiot and asked if she and swift where “together”, but he stupidly clarified by saying “not together as in lesbians or ellen together” to which Lorde replied,”is there something wrong with lesbians”.
Am I the only one that thought her method of making their relationship clear was a rather crude? I mean all the things she could have said, she made it sound like it was all sex. And maybe it is but still, not my business. Maybe I’m being a prude, cause I am a prude, but I just thought it was tasteless.
On the other hand, it seemed pretty obvious that they were dating and I wonder if the media’s ignorance with regard to it had more to do with them being interracial than it did with them being two women.
Can we talk about this?http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2739199/Hailee-Steinfeld-Game-Of-Thrones-actress-Sophie-Turner-step-hand-hand-ice-cream-treat-Malibu.html