If you’re caught in a bad pattern, or can’t shake heartbreak or anxiety, ask yourself: what else might be true right now that I can’t see?

After April’s gentle lessons to release and surrender, May is here to get us into trouble.

A pile of gigantic, fiery-hearted monsters sleeping sweetly together is a good metaphor for this month. Even the gruffest, most cynical, and most wounded amongst us should be able to find some kind of sweet solace this month. But that doesn’t mean all our problems will disappear.

This month, we’re looking at your coming year in queer love: how you’ll be able to grow, where you’ll be able to heal, and where you can hold the faith and keep the dream alive. Here’s your roadmap to how to love yourself better this year, and show up for the ones you love — whether that’s your committed life partner or your an international network of queer communities.

“What a strange way to end the year. How strange to talk of personal love, right now, as though we can separate it out from love for everyone who is suffering and endangered. But queer love can and must encompass that—what are we here for if not to create new ways of loving, new communities of care, and a world with less repression and hatred?”

This month is all about love as a learning process. We begin the month with Sun and Venus (our sense of self, and how we attract love) in Gemini–sign of curiosity, humor, and investigation.

Tap into that Capricorn energy to be patient and realistic about whatever comes up, and honor your inner wise old crone this month as you navigate all your loves and likes and lusts: picture yourself in ten, twenty, or thirty years and think about the life you’d like to build.