On your marks, quiz fans, because the race is on to discover which is the Olympic event for you!
Don’t worry, this is not an actual race (wow, how stressful would a timed quiz be?!) and unlike real sports you get unlimited do-overs. It really is the taking part that counts!
Note: this quiz will just be covering events from the summer games, so before all you Tonya Harding fans start waving your crowbars around, rest assured that we will be back with a winter version next year!
What's Your Summer Olympics Event?
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Sally lives in the UK. Her work has been featured in a Korean magazine about queer people and their pets, and a book about haunted prisons. She never intended for any of this to happen.
Sally has written 75 articles for us.
This is good, as it allows me to go to the beach, and even a little into the water, without actually being deep in the water.
(I have severe Thalassophobia.)
I am pleased for this outcome for you! Gentle ocean splashes only!
Sculpture! I love it, I learned something, apt
Me too! And I actually used to be a sculptor!
Sometimes I am scared by the accuracy of these quizzes
Me too Sally, me too!
And excellent Louise Bourgeoise reference!
Real Tonya Harding stans know she’s not defined by the actions of the shitty men in her life! Also it wasn’t a crow bar. Also I got beach volleyball.
Just for you I’ll be sure to include a “Pick a telescopic baton” question in the Winter Olympics quiz!!
I appreciate that! 🙏⛸❄️
i’m a gymnast! by the by i am still waiting for some female gymnast to show up with visible tattoos (the men have a TON)
Vanessa Ferrari has the Olympic rings on the back of her neck! It’s visible when her hair’s up.
Actually, Rebeca Andrade has two small tattoos, one really cute flower behind her ear, and another one on the back of her neck. I am admittedly thirst-watching this Olympics and checking out everyone’s tattoos.
Gymnastics, it’s so funny to me because as a kid I as so obsessed with women’s gymnastics and I look at it now and I’m like, yeah I was gay!
Soccer! Considering that I willingly woke up at 4am this morning to watch the semifinals, that’s accurate. Love me some soccer gays.
Fencing! En garde!
I wasn’t sure if the boob-touching cake would throw the results off but I couldn’t not pick it
I am v glad you went with your boob-touching instincts but still got your desired pointy stick outcome!
Come on now, ain’t no stereotype just the truth. Where is the softball?
I deliberated for a while because it’s such a gay sport, but it’s been so in and out of the games I opted for some old stalwarts instead!
Fair enough. And it’ll be out again in 2024. No rationale. Let the queer women play!
I feel so seen as a no-sports-person. I am not an artist myself but I do love me a nice sculpture at a weirdly specific modern arts exhibition at a first date where I am going to completely alienate the girl with unnecessary knowledge
… and Bratislava is the capital of Slovakia
I was just going to write that. The capital of Slovenia is Ljubljana.
Doh, it was meant to be Slovakia all along – fixed now!
ha! got archery. am archer and also very pleased with this result and also this quiz (are all the photos in the best athlete question serena williams?)
Greatest Athlete of All Time 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Boxing. Ha! no. Still fun, though! Olympic breast exam cake, whut?
Basketball! I’m the least athletic person in the world but I guess the quiz knew how tall I am?
Also I would love to know what the search terms were to find the cake pictures (“gay sports cakes”?) and how hilarious the runner-up cakes that did not make it into the quiz were.
This is an excellent question!! Initially I wanted the cakes to all be cake disasters because it would be less obvious what the sports were, but other than a very amusing horse doing the splits and a couple of others, these were pretty tricky to find!
The mutual-boob-touching cake is genius, bras off to whoever made it
Sculpture! My mom is an artist, so I can always try and see if I’m a chip off the ol’ block, and if that chip can be aesthetically pleasing enough to win gold. Or at the very least win gold leaf.
I filled this out on the way to football (soccer) practice and got gymnastics.
Not much of a leotard fan but maybe I will use this as an excuse to work on my overhead kicks haha.
An enjoyable quiz once again, thank you
Equestrian and irl horse girl. And I was so excited about the Catherine Dufour shoutout!
I wanted Archery or Boxing (which I actually do). I got Weightlifting and I ain’t mad.
My Olympic event is sculpture. I am not surprised. I would actually start watching the Olympics if that was still a thing.
And I really want Renée Sintenis’ haircut.
The GOAT question really nailed it.
I’m sorry no one shared their signature move ! Mine is The Bonobo Grip.
The Bonobo Grip is a sly move that has my opponent in any floormat competition banging on the mat yelling Yes ! Yes ! YES !
Oh and I want all of the cakes.