Quiz: What Gay Party Bus Are You Boarding?

Hello, and welcome to the Sunday Quiz!! Autostraddle is currently fundraising, which means everyone on senior staff is working longer hours than usual, so while every quiz I personally write tends to be un petit deranged, if you feel as if this particular quiz is even more weird and specific than usual — you’re probably correct! The quiz is inspired by the Sarah Paulson x Tig Notaro Lesbian Party Bus moment in queer history from last week. And if you have no idea what I’m talking about, lucky for you, we have a detailed explainer all about the who, what, where of the Lesbian Party Bus. (Or, you know, if you don’t care about the Lesbian Party Bus and are just here for some mindless quiz-taking, that’s fine, too!)

What is your preferred form of transportation?(Required)
What is the sexiest form of transportation?(Required)
You have a long bus ride ahead of you; what are you doing to occupy yourself?(Required)
Choose a bus:(Required)
You and your friends have rented a party bus — where are you going?(Required)
What’s the playlist like on your party bus?(Required)
What is the number one ESSENTIAL for your party bus?(Required)
Pick a movie featuring a form of transportation in the title:(Required)
Choose your fighter, Lesbian Party Bus Edition:(Required)
Choose a still from the 1994 movie Speed:(Required)
Choose an Indigo Girls lyric:(Required)
What anthropomorphized form of transportation from a children’s show is the most TERRIFYING?(Required)

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Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya

Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya is the managing editor of Autostraddle and a lesbian writer of essays, short stories, and pop culture criticism living in Orlando. She is the assistant managing editor of TriQuarterly, and her short stories appear or are forthcoming in McSweeney's Quarterly Concern, Joyland, Catapult, The Offing, and more. Some of her pop culture writing can be found at The A.V. Club, Vulture, The Cut, and others. You can follow her on Twitter or Instagram and learn more about her work on her website.

Kayla has written 837 articles for us.


  1. I always think I’m going to get a surprising quiz result that reveals how cool and hot I am and I always get the equivalent of The High School Show Choir Competition Bus. I accept my fate.

  2. The High School Show Choir Competition Bus

    This tracks pretty well, despite me not being able to carry a tune in a bucket. I feel like studio arts gays are pretty close in spirit to theater gays. Plus, I was a Shark in my junior high school production of West Side Story.

  3. As someone who was in orchestra, wind ensemble, marching band, and jazz band, I feel specifically called out by getting the High School Show Choir Competition Bus. And having spent so much time on competition buses, I can confirm that they contain a bumper crop of horny, drama-filled chaos.

  4. “You’re boarding The Megabus From Ann Arbor to Chicago in 2011 To Meet a Tumblr Friend for the First Time While You’re Both Kind of Closeted (But You More Than Her)”

    How is this so accurate??? 😂 I met my wife on Tumblr in 2015, I was sort of out but she didn’t know she was queer yet.

  5. I do not know where I went wrong to end up on the high school show choir bus! My closest brush to theater gay was junior year of high school when I signed up for the theater crew (in hopes of painting and using power tools) and ended up the stage manager. We did go to state with that show, but I’m no performer!

  6. The Magic School Bus, but I can definitively say that not once did my report card say I was “a pleasure to have in class.”

    Nor was I the kid put in the corner for not drawing flowers in neat rows of green and red.

    I was the kid sent to the principal’s office for scribbling black crayon* all over a picture of a house during Fire Safety Awareness week.

    * It was smoke.

  7. High School Show Choir Competition Bus!

    I was Theatre Gay adjacent in college, and funnily enough the theatre kids didn’t know they were gay yet, but I sure was, and I sure did !

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