Nuggets, Milkshakes, Nosebleeds: Love After Heartbreak

feature image via Roya DelSol

J​uly brings on nosebleeds each day and I feel embarrassed that I can’t seem to predict or easily stop them. I grew up with nosebleeds, but it’s been a few years since I had any. These come at unexpected times. Walking to the train station, trying to hold it together for work. Waking up from a night where the temperature is manageable, blood filtering to the back of my throat. Sometimes I see the blood drip before I feel it; while I’m remembering to brush my teeth, shower or pee. I have no control over it, and I don’t see it coming. If I’m not having nosebleeds, I’m taking bathroom breaks at work just to breathe, cry, pinch my skin.

My mother drives around my hometown, letting me sit in the passenger seat staring ahead, not really looking at the road, but not really looking at anything in particular. Sometimes we talk, other times we drive, both silent, listening to a rundown of the top 40 or an underground garage station.

My mum finds a drive-thr...

You've Reached A+ Content!

A+ is a chosen family of thousands of queer-as-all-get-out, amazing, altruistic, friends who support Autostraddle. They're the reason we're here, and you can be, too. 81% of Autostraddle’s funding comes from readers like you. And in a time where companies are shuttering left and right, Autostraddle, and this haven for queer women, and trans and non-binary people only exists because people like you support. YOU, our community, are the reason we are even here right now. If you can, and especially, if you want to enjoy this A+ post, please consider supporting Autostraddle by joining A+ so that we can keep going — for everyone.

**Join A+!**

Did you know Cobalt Membership starts at just $1 a week? Every dollar matters when it comes to helping Autostraddle thrive, build queer community, and be here for the next person who needs us.

Join A+ Today!

Already a member? Sign in

Bailey is a non-binary UK-based dabbler in activism, media and policy change. Love languages include quality time, physical touch, rollercoasters, karaoke and pineapple on pizza. They are often found doing too many things at once and avoiding the indecisive traits listed in their birth chart.

Bailey has written 4 articles for us.