Nevermind your feelings about pumpkin spice everything. It is, indeed, decorative gourd season, and those of us with digestive issues are feeling trés left out. All you normies out there with your guts of steel may not notice that all of the gluten free baked goods on the shelves are conspicuously stuffed with butter and cheese, and if it’s dairy free, it’s made of all variety of gluten. The madness never ends, especially if you have a soy allergy (thankfully I do not). NO FEAR! I have developed a Frankenstein pumpkin pie, free of dairy, gluten and soy that you could actually feed to your families on Thanksgiving and nobody would be the wiser.
One of my favorite activities is taking a plain-old recipe off the web and re-inventing it in my laboratory (pronounced lah-bohr-ah-to-ree, like on Dexter’s Lab). I take even more pleasure in my work when I get to butcher a recipe like this one by Paula Deen. I like to imagine her tossing and turning in a cold sweat with night terrors while I extract all of the butter, eggs, heavy cream and cream cheese from her heart-attack pie, only to be replaced with everything coconut: oil, cream, flour, you name it.
First Things First
You need a crust. If you want to make it from scratch you can use one of these recipes, but ain’t nobody got time for that, so I used Bob’s Red Mill Biscuit & Baking Mix. One very important step I found has changed my gluten-free pie-baking experience is to make sure you roll your dough out on a piece of plastic wrap. GF dough has a tendency to fall apart during the transfer, so instead of bringing your dough to the pie dish, invert your pie dish on top of the dough (which is on top of the plastic wrap), pull together the sides of the plastic wrap and flip your dish over. Ta-da! With any luck, your crust will remain intact. Adjust any imperfections with your fingers. Do NOT forget to grease the dish like I do. every. single. time.
Second Things Second
Here is the recipe I modified from our most tolerated racist grandmother, Paula Deen:
8 oz. package cream cheese8oz. coconut cream(not milk), with the oil drained off
- 2 cups canned pumpkin, mashed
- 1 cup sugar
- 1/4 teaspoon salt
1 egg plus 2 egg yolks, slightly beaten1/4 cup cornstarch, liquefied (mixed with water and stirred until completely liquid) 1 cup half-and-halfew, no thank you 1/4 cup melted butter1/4 cup warm coconut oil
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
- 1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
- 1/4 teaspoon ground cloves
- 1 piece
pre-madegluten free pie dough Whipped cream, for toppingcoconut cream, for whipping (optional)
Place 1 piece of pre-made pie dough down into a (9-inch) pie pan and press down along the bottom and all sides. Pinch and crimp the edges together to make a pretty pattern.
Fit a piece of aluminum foil to cover the inside of the shell completely. Fill the shell up to the edges with pie weights or dried beans (about 2 pounds) and place it in the oven. Bake for 10 minutes, remove the foil and pie weights and bake for another 10 minutes or until the crust is dried out and beginning to color.
For the filling, in a large mixing bowl, beat the
cream cheesecoconut cream with a mixer. Add the pumpkin and beat until combined.
Add the sugar and salt, and beat until combined. Add the
eggs mixed with the yolks, half-and-half, and melted butterliquefied cornstarch and warm coconut oil, and beat until combined. Finally, add the vanilla, cinnamon, ginger and cloves,beat until incorporated. Do not forget to lick the spatula. 1) because you’re a grown-up and can do whatever you want, and 2) because it’s vegan and 100% salmonella-free!
Pour the filling into the warm prepared pie crust and bake for 50 minutes, or until the center is set. Place the pie on a wire rack and cool to room temperature.
Third Things Last
The Whipped Coconut Cream
- 1 can coconut cream (or whole canned coconut milk), chilled overnight
- 3 teaspoons confectioner’s sugar (or sweetener of your preference)
- ½ teaspoon vanilla extract
I didn’t have any cans of coconut cream left over, so I put a can of whole coconut milk in the fridge overnight to separate.
Right before you’re about to whip, put your mixing bowl in the freezer for a few minutes.
Flip your can of coconut cream/milk over, open it from the bottom and drain off the liquid. I’m sure you can use this liquid for something, but I never have. It feels like a waste until you’ve got a bunch of dairy free whipped cream and then everything feels all right.
Using a hand or stationary mixer, with the whipping attachment, begin whipping your coconut cream. Add sweetener and vanilla. Continue whipping until your cream has stiff peaks.
Put that shit on your pumpkin pie and eat it! Welcome to the wonderful world of autumnal baked goods!
WOWOWOW Thank you for this!!!
Also, I thoroughly appreciate your crossing out the original stuff, but still leaving it read-able, because that means I can pick and choose which things I want to exclude for myself. Good work.
Yes! I totally agree! I just sent this to a straight guy friend [a nerdy, awkward engineer straight guy friend…] of mine who has A) Celiac disease and other food intolerance issues and B) awful luck with women (even just as friends) and C) Awful luck with men and non-binary people as friends too. So I basically told him “make people yummy gluten free pie to share with you- you’ll make lots of new friends.” =D
He actually taught me something cool in *his* kitchen- To make allergen friendly flavored coffee, when brewing regular coffee put powdered cinnamon in with your coffee grounds. We found that three hearty shakes of your cinnamon shaker per cup of coffee that you’re making works well. [Alternatively for the gourmets out there- grind cinnamon stick pieces in your coffee maker then grind the coffee beans in with it (because powdered “cinnamon” in the United States is actually powdered cassia bark, not “true” cinnamon)]. Once the cinnamon’s in with the coffee grounds, stir the grounds and cinnamon together then brew the coffee like normal. [Putting it in with the grounds works much better than trying to stir it in after the coffee’s already made]. For people who can’t have soy, I’ve never personally used any coconut products in my coffee, but almond milk tastes great as a replacement for cream or soy milk in coffee [and I’m saying that as a meat eater with no food intolerances]. Pour the coffee into your most awesome mugs, make extra whipped coconut cream from the recipe above, and top your delicious cinnamon coffee with it. If you want to get fancy, add a dash of cinnamon on top of the whipped cream. To impress her even more, garnish the coffee by putting a cinnamon stick in it. Serve alongside the pie. Bonus: making cinnamon coffee makes your apartment smell heavenly- it’s like a free cinnamon/coffee/pumpkin/awesomeness of fall air freshener <3
Unf. Drooling. I can’t wait to try this out I’ve been searching for food-allergy friendly recipes for the fall months for agggesss. Thanks so much!!!!
Ugh yes! You are the best. Definitely going to make this today!
I saw the name and thought “The pie is down to f*ck? Good to know.” That’s not what dtf means in this case, right? I’m fine either way, just asking.
Do you have a preferred coconut milk? I’ve been using Trader Joe’s coconut cream which is amazing but they’ve discontinued it while they “reformulate” aka I’m crying because I’m addicted to coconut whipped cream now. All other brands I’ve tried won’t separate.
This recipe is beautiful though.
Yeah! I used Native Valley organic coconut cream. It comes in teeny tiny cans and I bought it at Whole Foods. Hope this helps :)
I was so excited to make this when you talked about it originally, but I have a nasty skin allergy to corn starch that means I probably shouldn’t. There’s no reason I can’t force Camille to make it for me while I’m frightfully avoiding the kitchen, however…
Kaitlyn! You can use lots of things to substitute for eggs! Though I feel like cornstarch is your best bet for a nice, thick pie filling, you can use silken tofu as long as you don’t have a soy allergy!
Arrowroot starch/powder (same thing) is a great sub for corn starch! I can’t tolerate corn in any form and always use it in recipes calling for corn starch.
Y’all are true heroes
Uh . . . being dairy, gluten AND Soy free SUCKS!!!! Thank you for giving me hope for pie this season.
(Yes I left this comment wide open for euphemism based jokes)
Thanks for this! I am gluten free and my sister’s allergic to eggs and dairy so I was hoping to find a good pumpkin pie recipe for Thanksgiving. Can’t wait to try it!