Also.Also.Also: 49ers Lose Super Bowl, but Lesbian Coach Katie Sowers Is Still a Winner, Baby!

Feature Image via Katie Sowers’ Instagram

Welcome to Monday! I hope your tea this morning was strong, your email backlog is brief, and may your evening tonight be peaceful with a side of chocolate.

Queer as in F*ck You

Introducing: The Tenderqueer, the Softboi of the Queer Community (The subheading on this piece reads “Sure, you’ve heard of the straight softboi. But queer, non-binary and trans folk will recognise a similar aesthetic ‘type’ too.” and our entire team called bullshit. Who’s ever heard of a STRAIGHT softboi?)

Al(aina) included this in yesterday’s Sunday Funday, but I loved it so much, I absolutely had to re-up it. Happy Black History Month ❤️🖤💚 everyone:

His name was William Dorsey Swann, but to his friends he was known as “the Queen.” Both of those names had been forgotten for nearly a century… Born in Maryland around 1858, Swann endured slavery, the Civil War, racism, police surveillance, torture behind bars, and many other injustices. But beginning in the 1880s, he not only became the first American activist to lead a queer resistance group; he also became, in the same decade, the first known person to dub himself a “queen of drag” — or, more familiarly, a drag queen.

The First Drag Queen Was a Former Slave, who fought for queer freedom a century before Stonewall.

Speaking of Black History Month, over at Black Women Radicals they are celebrating with the 2020 theme, #MakingBlackQueerHistory: Black LGBTQ+ Women and Non-Binary Student-Activism at Historically Black Colleges and Universities. Including, but not limited to:

What a Queer Lunar New Year Celebration Looks Like

Congratulations again to Katie Sowers, offensive assistant coach to the San Francisco 49ers. We’ve previously talked about how she’s the first woman and the first openly gay coach in a Super Bowl, but perhaps more impressively, she also had my favorite commercial last night:

And if you’re crushing as hard as I am right now, here’s five other interesting things to know about her.

As a part of her new cover interview for InStyle, Demi Lovato discussed what it was like to come out to her parents in 2017. (Demi also sang the National Anthem during last night’s game. She nailed it, of course.)

Saw This, Thought of You

The Millennial Jews Taking on ICE. I’ve been following this group for a while now (at least last summer, maybe earlier? What is time in a political hellscape?) and I have SUCH respect for them.

Making Facial Recognition Easier Might Make Stalking Easier, Too by our Rachel Charlene Lewis for Bitch Media

10 Latina Authors on the Books That Changed Their Lives

As Puerto Rico Struggles With Rising Femicides, an Art Series of Portraits Remembers Those Lost in 2019

Every Super Bowl Halftime Show Since 1993, Ranked

Plus, Jennifer Lopez and Shakira!! Excuse me for a moment:

How a KitchenAid mixer and Le Creuset stew pot became The New Trophies of Domesticity. Relatable content; it’s a long term dream of mine to one day own a KitchenAid for my Sunday baking projects. THAT SAID none of us should define our worth based on the material things we own. Just a loving reminder, from me to you!

Out Of Sexting Ideas? Try These

Political Snacks

The Iowa Caucus is happening today, and here’s a sweet lil thing in honor of that. A profile of tween girls that’s full of nostalgic, intimately familiar middle school angst: Iowa 8th-Graders Held Their Own Caucus. Their Results Look Nothing Like the Polls.

And in case you were wondering, here’s How the Iowa Caucuses Actually Work, including live action animation from The New York Times.

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Carmen Phillips

Carmen Phillips is Autostraddle's former editor in chief. She began at Autostraddle in 2017 as a freelance team writer and worked her way up through the company, eventually becoming the EIC from 2021-2024. A Black Puerto Rican feminist writer with a PhD in American Studies from New York University, Carmen specializes in writing about Blackness, race, queerness, politics, culture, and the many ways we find community and connection with each other.  During her time at Autostraddle, Carmen focused on pop culture, TV and film reviews, criticism, interviews, and news analysis. She claims many past homes, but left the largest parts of her heart in Detroit, Brooklyn, and Buffalo, NY. And there were several years in her early 20s when she earnestly slept with a copy of James Baldwin’s “Fire Next Time” under her pillow. To reach out, you can find Carmen on Twitter, Instagram, or her website.

Carmen has written 716 articles for us.


  1. growing up in texas, my first political memory was being the only kid in my second grade class to vote Kerry over Bush in our mock election; go lil iowa babies! civic participation!

  2. My chai tea was perfect this morning, I made hot chocolate this evening, and four of my girls are quietly in bed, so it’s all good.

    Also thanks for sharing the halftime show. People were talking about it at work and I now feel much more informed.

    I hope you are having a good evening, too!

  3. Thanks for the great roundup as always! Some other important Super Bowl content:
    Christine Sun Kim, a Deaf artist and activist, was selected to perform the national anthem alongside Demi Lovato. She nailed it,but they only telivized a short portion! Even the extended version online cut away from her at crucial moments.
    She wrote an excellent Op-Ed about the experience in the NYT:
    And the N.A.D. did post a full video of her performance:

  4. Not really that excited about a white woman coaching in the NFL. Because I don’t forget what they did to Colin Kaepernick. Adding more white people to a white supremacist structure does not make that structure any less white supremacist just because that person is gay and/or a woman. I just have a hard time celebrating this given EVERYTHING the NFL did and continues to do to erase Colin (not to mention being a mouthpiece for imperialism and nationalism).

    Unrelated, thanks for the article about Never Again Action (“Millenial Jews Taking On ICE”), they are amazing and I’m so grateful for them!

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