A+ Roundtable: Our Orgasm Thoughts

Feature image by CSA images / Vetta Collection via Getty Images

It’s actually not infrequently that we receive an A+ Advice Box question about orgasms. They are a hot topic, a topic of contention and confusion, sometimes joy and sometimes anguish! Folks feel all kinds of obligations to have them, to “give” them, to be able to orgasm in certain ways. There is even the phrase “achieve orgasm” which is really giving a lot of undue pressure here. Who said we had to hand out trophies? Worse, there's also the implication that we might not get a trophy. On the complete opposite end of the effort spectrum is “la petite mort.” Personally, I think that sounds like a nap. Anyway, words mean a lot! They can set expectations, but here, we’re all about taking those apart, taking deep breaths, and just letting ourselves be our beautiful queer selves, okay? As we at Autostraddle often say in one way or another in the sex advice we give — everyone’s experience is ultra personal and there really is n...

You've Reached A+ Content!

Autostraddle cannot survive without reader support. That's why we have our A+ Member program, where readers like you keep Autostraddle here for our whole community.

A+ members keep this site majority free-to-read, so sometimes we have bonus content for members as thanks! A+ membership starts at just $4/month or $30/year. If you can, will you join? You get access to bonus content like this post, insider information, behind-the-scenes laughs, and the singular satisfaction of knowing you’re helping to pay it forward for other readers and that you're keeping this bastion of queerness on the internet here for everyone.

99% of our readers do not support. That means that less than 1% of our readers are keeping this site running. Will YOU be one of the people who helps to keep this indie queer media site here for everyone?

We don't need one person to do it all, we need many people each doing a part. Every member makes a difference!

Join A+ Today!

Already a member? Sign in


We keep Autostraddle majority free-to-read, but it isn't free to create! We need YOU to sign up for A+ to help keep this indie queer media site funded. A+ membership starts at just $4/month or $30/year. If you can, will you join?

Join A+

the team

auto has written 648 articles for us.