We’ve got some breakups and breakdowns and questionable drunken decisions and a THRIVING new throuple and a school play with a very small cast and also Quiara’s still in town and she’s got a big surprise for Shane!

This episode has everything: pool sex, Olivia Thirlby, fun poppy lesbians, Jamie Clayton, the flu, Jillian Mercado, divorce papers, a gift card, an engagement party and a traditional lesbian building furniture with her bare hands!

It’s that time ladies. Queue everyone’s head exploding. That’s right: Tina and Bette are back in love/made out. Also Alice is the perfect housewife and Jenny is the perfect roommate.

It’s almost Valentine’s Day and Riese is sending out all her love. Luckily there’s lots to love in this episode with everyone looking very Shane today, the lesbian phone tree, Tasha being generally adorable, and of course: Angela Robinson.

Despite the fact that angus is a lying low-down nanny-fucking motherfucker, GIRLS ACTUALLY HAVE SEX THIS EPISODE. Even Kit and Papi. Ew, we know.

Of all foods: french fries. Of all underthings: boybriefs. . Of all girls: Shane. Of all cheekbones: Tasha’s. Of all L Word writers: Angela Robinson. Of all cities: New York City. Of all songs: “Just Like Heaven,” by the Cure. It’s just … such a perfect song, and the last song I ever expected to hear during an L Word sex scene!