Results for: be the change
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When One of Us Transitioned, Our Relationship Changed for the Better
By the time the lockdown lifted, she (Lucy) had kicked a life-long nail biting habit, and I (Summer) had come out as transgender.
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When I Got COVID, My Wife and I Went Through It Together; How Will Things Change When She Returns to the Office?
“We probably won’t be together this much again until we’re both retired, and even though it has been, at times, harder than anything either of us could have imagined when the pandemic started, it’s also been some of our sweetest, most intimate, silliest, funnest times we’ve ever had as a couple.”
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You Need Help: I Moved Closer to My Girlfriend but She’s Too Busy for Me
The person who moved shouldn’t be the only person experiencing change.
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You Need Help: My Girlfriend Doesn’t Want To Have Sex
To me, both of these things are true: 1. People’s sex drives can change for any number of reasons, at any time and 2. If sex is important to you, that’s valid, too!
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You Need Help: You Should Divorce Your Transphobic Wife
Your wife fell in love with you and built a life with you and you’re a woman. You didn’t become a woman. You didn’t trick her into being queer — her own feelings did that.
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After 11 Years Together, My Partner Suddenly Wants To Call Off Our Engagement
“I feel like I’ve built a whole personality around accommodating her schedule: apologizing for her absences and filling in for what she doesn’t make time for (cooking, housework).”
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You Need Help: How Do I Make Myself Like My Girlfriend’s Cat?
You already did things right by talking about this before moving in together. Now it’s time to talk some more.
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You Need Help: My Partner and I Aren’t Having Sex — How Can I Still Foster Intimacy?
Sometimes in long-term relationships, our needs shift and/or our capacity to fulfill someone’s needs shift.
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Forget New Relationship Energy, Embrace Stable Relationship Energy
Rather than striving for New Relationship Energy within a relationship that isn’t new, why don’t we embrace Stable Relationship Energy?
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After a Crash Course in Cohabitation, My Pandemic Relationship Will Have to Weather Outside Socialization
“I usually have an anxious attachment style, and it has moved toward becoming more secure during the pandemic, but that could shift again as we start to spend more time apart. I’m anticipating having to check in with myself about those things. I’m anticipating change in general, but after a year that included a lot of monotony, I’m not scared of change. Bring it on tbh.”
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Is Monogamy Cool Again?
Is the era of polyamory over? Are more queer people returning to monogamy? Or is it just a shift in the cultural conversation?
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7 Signs It’s Time for Couples Therapy, According to a Queer Relationship Therapist
You don’t have to wait for an extreme problem to seek out couples therapy.
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You Need Help: My Partner and I Have Different Sex Drives
You can’t change your partner, or her sex drive. All you can change is the situation you’re in.
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My Chronic Yeast Infections Wouldn’t Go Away — Until I Left My Toxic Relationship
I wish my doctor had mentioned the relationship between stress and chronic yeast infections.
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You Need Help: What To Do With This Meaningless, Single Life?
I want to try to hold space here for both: for your (and my, really) pain and for the possibility that you may not feel this way forever.
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You Need Help: I Want to Work on Myself, How Do I Do That?
I have behaviors I notice that spill into my relationship that stem from personal issues. I want to be a better person to myself, and my partner. I want to feel like my cup is full as I am, and then be able to use that to help fill our cup.
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I’m Not a Cat Lesbian but I Fell in Love With One
I never wanted to live with a cat. Of course, the universe had other plans.
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Trans Love in Pandemic Times
Love without a blueprint leaves room for unknown possibilities. I spoke to seven trans people about how the pandemic has changed their relationships and how trans love has changed their lives.
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You Need Help: You Fat-Shamed Your Beautiful Girlfriend
If your girlfriend wrote into this column with this story, I would tell her she should break up with you.
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You Need Help: My Partner Keeps Saying We’re Going to Break Up!
The fact that you feel affected by what your partner tells you, even when they’re not their best self, is not inappropriate or bad. It’s human.