30 Days of Carol: Day 27 – The Plot of Every Carol Character’s Movie Based on Their Poster

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Isn’t it incredible that we found out the real story behind Carol is that time travel exists and lesbians are at the helm? Cinema: I love it. How one small detail can take a movie from romance to science fiction – that’s the magic of the screen.

The breakthrough reminded me of how different Carol could have been if it was based on this alternate poster featuring Therese in a shadowy expanse. Whenever I’ve seen it, I’ve imagined this Carol to be a movie about a scorned mistress who eventually breaks into an office to collect receipts. Then yesterday I came across a chart from Electric Literature that generates elevator pitches for you, and when I plugged ol’ Carol in there, I got:

A lyrical thriller about a refugee mistress’s endeavor to re-awaken her political apathy.

If I wasn’t dead tf on. I didn’t specify what she was collecting receipts for, and now I know it’s about voter fraud. I wondered what else this chart knew, so I put it to work for every character.



A psycho-sexual tragedy about an agoraphobic ghost’s dream to confront her sexless marriage.


An edge-of-your-seat meditation about a wealthy murder detective’s strategy to explore her privilege.


A heartrending thriller about a dissatisfied student’s dream to re-awaken his political apathy.


A profound thriller about an unlucky child’s failure to explore his toxic friendships.


An inspiring noir about a quixotic ghost’s dream to transcend her traumatic childhood.


An inspiring trilogy about an agoraphobic mother’s pains to re-awaken her father’s murder.


A razor-sharp war epic about a precocious adolescent’s plan to pursue a sexless marriage.


A darkly comic thriller about a doomed divorcee’s expedition to reawaken his Oedipal complex.


A darkly comic war epic about a depressed child’s effort to expose her social media addiction.


A darkly comic war epic about an unlucky child’s failure to accept her (parent’s) sexless marriage.


A riveting story about a doomed widow’s adventure to circumvent her mother’s death.


A riveting story about an unlucky mother’s battle to reawaken her political apathy.


A riveting autobiographical novel about a wealthy adolescent’s vacation to expose her fear of spiders.


A psycho-sexual autobiographical novel about a precocious extended family’s promise to expose their spiritual evolution.

Los Angeles based writer. Let's keep it clean out there!

Erin has written 207 articles for us.

19 Comments

  1. “The 100” and “Supergirl”,
    “The 100” and “Supergirl”,
    I’d rather have “Carol” than “The 100” and “Supergirl”,
    The way they treat their gays,
    Is gonna make me hurl,
    I’d rather have “Carol” than “The 100” and “Supergirl”

    Don’t give me subtext,
    Which fanfic has to fill,
    Or kill the lesbians,
    To give the straights a thrill,
    But just give me a savior,
    As beautiful as a pearl,
    I’d rather have “Carol” than “The 100” and “Supergirl”

  2. I tried a reverse lookup with the pitch chart — describe the plot and see what you can spell — but all I got was gibberish like:
    RGBIJUV “Riveting romance about a wealthy woman’s inability to give up her secret second family.”
    My second try was better:
    QIIIMYW “Unforgettable story about a young woman’s not-so-secret desire to embrace her sexual awakening.” I very nearly spelled QUIM (with an extra I), but tragicomedy just didn’t fit.
    If nothing else, my experiment resulted in a kick-ass password generator.

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